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Even the ugliest person's cellulite is more attractive than the most beautiful supermodel's lower intestine.' I'd put that on a T-shirt but probably Mark Twain already said it.


Jenny Lawson

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JILL ALEXANDER ESSBAUM Mark Twain put it best when he said, 'Reports of my demise are greatly exaggerated,
BILL BRADLEY There is no beauty that is more beautiful than a kind heart for the ugliest are always the ugly hear...
ARES E. R. BAES Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
KINKY FRIEDMAN I agree with what Mark Twain said - we're all mad at night.
RUTH RENDELL When I think of the most beautiful women, they're not supermodels.
BECKI NEWTON The ugliest thing in the world is a beautiful woman without the brains or courage to know that [beau...
CHARLIE FLETCHER Integrity is not everything, but it is the only thing that matters.
JEFFREY FRY People wrote the most beautiful things during the ugliest times.
JOSHUA BELL The most beautiful rainbows are sometimes formed in the ugliest storms.
MATSHONA DHLIWAYO Mark Twain: A Life
RON POWERS Mark Twain.
FRIENDS The answer isn't more time but a greater awareness of the time we have.
CRAIG GROESCHEL Consider well the proportion of things. It is better to be a young June bug, than an old bird of par...
MARK TWAIN If it wasn't for the Mark Twain Masquers, I don't know where my life would have gone.
PETER FALK (The deputy) said it looks more scraggly and thinner than it did, ... That’s even more dangerous be...
BRIAN WALKER Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most [borrowed from Mark Twain]
GERARD WAY He (Holbrook) said he has one of the first Mark Twain costumes he wore on stage and was saving it un...
LEE WARREN I bought a book of Mark Twain quotes. That's about my speed. I'll read a couple quotes and p...
KID ROCK The mark of a wise person is being able to reach beyond the truth, to admit they can learn more than...
TERRY GOODKIND The world is a beautiful place
to be born into
if you don't mind happiness
not always...
LAWRENCE FERLINGHETTI (The deputy) said it looks more scraggly and thinner than it did, ... That’s even more dangerous b...
BRIAN WALKER Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
KINKY FRIEDMAN Mark Twain said, 'The right word is to the nearly right word as lightning is to the lightning bu...
ROBERT LITTELL Mark Twain cannot be defined.
HAL HOLBROOK Those who have heard me speak from time to time know that quite often I cite the observation of that...
J. D. HAYWORTH Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."

[Mark...
MARK TWAIN But that is the way we are made: we don't reason, where we feel; we just feel.
MARK TWAIN We will not put a lid on opinions. On the contrary, it is more important than ever that political de...
JENS STOLTENBERG To paraphrase Mark Twain, our demise is greatly exaggerated.
CHRIS DONLAY Jessica Rabbit! People wouldn't call her the most beautiful person in Hollywood, but I find her ...
TOM WESTON-JONES Mark Twain is as big as America. He really is.
VAL KILMER Stocks now become more attractive than bonds and companies will have easier and cheaper access to fu...
YAREK ARANOWICZ The finance ministers are not really going beyond statements that have already been put out, and unt...
LARRY BRICKMAN When you find that you are on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect." Mark Twain
STEVE J. LEATHERWOOD Everything is about cut. But worse than couture cuts. The dresses from far away, you think that it i...
KARL LAGERFELD Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you...
MARK TWAIN I read from Mark Twain's lips one or two of his good stories. He has his own way of thinking, saying...
HELEN KELLER His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the wh...
MARK TWAIN It is curious-curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so r...
MARK TWAIN One of the most attractive things about the flowers is their beautiful reserve.
HENRY DAVID THOREAU Mark Twain gave us an insight into the life on the Mississippi at the turn of the century.
BOB NEWHART If the trends continue, I think it is likely that game platforms will become a more attractive targe...
ED MOYLE Beauty is subjective: Bette Davis wasn't beautiful, but she was more than beautiful.
JACQUES AUDIARD I think a fragrance is more of a signature than even what you wear - something you'll remember m...
RYAN REYNOLDS A beautiful woman must expect to be more accountable for her steps, than one less attractive.
SAMUEL RICHARDSON Basically we call it caller ID on steroids. This is a great opportunity to leverage all of the techn...
ERIC DISHMAN Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll li...
DICK VAN DYKE Training- training is everything; training is all there is to a person. We speak of nature; it is fo...
MARK TWAIN It is said, that in Holland Interest is lower than in England.
DUDLEY NORTH I grew up reading Shakespeare and Mark Twain.
JACKSON BROWNE If anything, taxes for the lower and middle class and maybe even the upper middle class should even ...
WARREN BUFFETT Mark Twain and I are in the same position. We have put things in such a way as to make people, who w...
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW But for that, prices must fall lower to become attractive for the funds.
MARCOS BASAGLIA There is so much drama in most people’s lives that many persons, more often than not, do not even ...
ANUJ SOMANY I saw a transvestite wearing a T-shirt that said 'Guess'.
DEMETRI MARTIN Mark Twain had a way of telling stories that shifts your consciousness away from labels.
VAL KILMER Everything that's attractive, beautiful, shiny, bright... we put it on ourselves. It can be passed o...
HOWARD WILLIA Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'l...
DICK VAN DYKE Most of the art I have is more on the beautiful side than the violent or disturbing side.
AGNES GUND It is a lie.
ARTHUR MILLER It is already clear that the new slogan for the ID movement is going to be 'Teach the Controversy!' ...
EUGENIE SCOTT It's the relationships between people that are more important than the sort of far away fantasie...
MIRA SORVINO It's always nerve-racking to take off your clothes on film. But doing it with a woman felt safer...
NAOMI WATTS Conservatism is the blind and fear-filled worship of dead radicals.
MARK TWAIN Human beings can be awful cruel to one another.
MARK TWAIN The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, ...
MARK TWAIN Life devoid of jealousy, selfishness, craftiness and hypocrisy is the most beautiful and attractive ...
ANUJ SOMANY I live a dual life. On the red carpet, it's complete glam. But at home, I'm a jeans and T-sh...
ASHLEY GREENE Mark was trusted by Labor as a thinker, as a formidable parliamentarian, as a moving advocate of Lab...
JULIA GILLARD It is practically and sensibly impossible to make an indelible mark of good impression in other pers...
ANUJ SOMANY It's just my natural way - to be funny. I don't know why that is. But as I've said, humo...
T. C. BOYLE Id rather be told am beautiful than get a poem saying I look like sunshine
KIMBERLY SHILENJE I can't give more than I have. It doesn't matter if I am the most beautiful person in the ro...
OLIVIA THIRLBY Good nature is worth more than knowledge, more than money, more than honor, to the persons who posse...
HENRY WARD BEECHER Good nature is worth more than knowledge, more than money, more than honor, to the persons who posse...
HENRY WARD BEECHER An investment said to have an 80% chance of success sounds far more attractive than one with a 20% c...
DANIEL KAHNEMAN In fact, most notebook contract makers are now posting much lower profit margins than the 5 to 6 per...
ALBERT CHEN It sounds like something on a very trite T-shirt, but life is what happens.
NIGELLA LAWSON Where d'ye think he is now?" Jenny said suddenly. "Ian, I mean."
He glanced at the house, then ...
DIANA GABALDON I, Mark Twain being of sound mind, have spent everything
MARK TWAIN Mark Twain supposedly observed, 'Don't pick a fight with anyone who buys ink by the barrel and paper...
THOMAS F. CALCAGNI So you don't speak English, you have no ID, you can't tell where you're from... that'...
JOE ARPAIO Good sense is of all things in the world the most equally distributed, for everybody thinks he is so...
RENE DESCARTES His life seemed like a deck of cards, and in the midst of all those two’s and three’s someone ha...
TEKOA MANNING Everybody thinks himself so well supplied with common sense that even those most difficult to please...
RENE DESCARTES Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
MARK TWAIN A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies whic...
OSSIP GABRILOWITSCH Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS Honesty: The best of all the lost arts.
MARK TWAIN You can find in a text whatever you bring, if you will stand between it and the mirror of you imagin...
MARK TWAIN Papa! You painted my nose!"
"I certainly did," her father said.
"But why?" Belle tried to ...
WALT DISNEY COMPANY When we look and feel happy, it’s beautiful and more attractive than anything we could possibly im...
RON BARATONO But if you take the halo effect of all the free advertising and media exposure, put a dollar value o...
JOE PHILLIPPI Are you high? Why are you never wearing a shirt?"

"I sleep naked," Cole said. He put both...
MAGGIE STIEFVATER [March 25 -] Songs and Stories for Everybody ... the Mark Twain of contemporary kids' music.
BILL HARLEY Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. -T-Shirt
DARYNDA JONES I simply adore 'The Simpsons.' I go to bed in a 'Simpsons' T-shirt.
STEVEN SPIELBERG Whatever can die is beautiful — more beautiful than a unicorn, who lives forever, and who is the m...
PETER S. BEAGLE [Moran dismissed critics who said the license bill would create a national ID.] I don't think, perso...
JIM MORAN

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GABE LAWSON He was on fire tonight.
GABE LAWSON We showed that we're able to win without Ashley. The guys played great as a team, and this win gives...
GABE LAWSON That was one of our best-played games of the year. We came out on fire in the second half and took a...
GABE LAWSON It feels good; it's about time. We've been struggling lately, and it feels good to come through in a...
GABE LAWSON As people came by he would ask people if they wanted to buy some fruit, ... He told them he had some...
GEORGE LAWSON As people came by he would ask people if they wanted to buy some fruit, ... He told them he had some...
GEORGE LAWSON Basically I was at the flea market with the family, and this guy was standing there soliciting moons...
GEORGE LAWSON It's bad enough when you have got such a terrible affliction once. It's doubly bad when it comes aro...
GEOFF LAWSON Gillespie ... was asked to go back to domestic cricket and find some form.
GEOFF LAWSON It's a wonderful way to exercise. If you're line dancing, you have to pay attention and memorize. It...
EVA LAWSON