I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie.
JIMMY FALLON Politics is pop. Our job as comedians - especially me, as a late-night talk show, which is a broader...
JIMMY FALLON I wanted to be a Priest at one point. I was pretty religious. I was an altar boy, and I was good at ...
JIMMY FALLON 'Have fun' is my message. Be silly. You're allowed to be silly. There's nothing wron...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you, hard taco shells, for surviving the long journey from factory, to supermarket, to my plat...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you, yard sales, for being the perfect way to say to your neighbors: 'We think we're i...
JIMMY FALLON Researches tested a new form of medical marijuana that treats pain but doesn't get the user high...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happen...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you, people who say 'Wow, you're really photogenic,' for not saying what you reall...
JIMMY FALLON There's always going to be someone out there... who doesn't believe in you or who thinks you...
JIMMY FALLON I'd be nothing without my wife. She's the coolest. She's the greatest. She is the smarte...
JIMMY FALLON You only think of the best comeback when you leave.
JIMMY FALLON I wanted to be the next Dana Carvey. This was my ultimate goal. If I ever cut into a birthday cake a...
JIMMY FALLON I don't even read the papers. I read 'USA Today' because it has color photos.
JIMMY FALLON I like to see people laugh who are normally serious.
JIMMY FALLON In New York, there are so many potholes, they're like craters on the moon. That's another tr...
JIMMY FALLON I don't like to kick people when they're down. I like to kick people when they're up.
JIMMY FALLON If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of ...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... motion sensor hand towel machine. You never work, so I just end up looking like I'm...
JIMMY FALLON I like video games, I like tech, I like being positive.
JIMMY FALLON Don't keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way...
JIMMY FALLON I'm going to North Pole to help out Santa this year.
JIMMY FALLON L.A., it's nice, but I think of sunshine and people on rollerblades eating sushi. New York, I th...
JIMMY FALLON Researches at Yale found a connection between brain cancer and work environment. The No. 1 most dang...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food.
JIMMY FALLON The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere.
JIMMY FALLON Everyone looks so much better when they smile.
JIMMY FALLON When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who makes ballon animals, I think of their relative...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... adjustable baseball caps with no logo on the front and mesh netting in the back, for be...
JIMMY FALLON I like being absurd. Being silly.
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... 'Real Housewives of Atlanta,' for demonstrating a universal truth: Idiots like ...
JIMMY FALLON People have disliked me. You know, in high school, I wasn't the most popular kid. I wasn't t...
JIMMY FALLON I, of course, wanted to do something with Drew Barrymore. Please. So we were reading scripts back an...
JIMMY FALLON My parents were kind of over protective people. Me and my sister had to play in the backyard all the...
JIMMY FALLON Hey baby, do you like fine cooking? Cause you know what? I got Swanson's Dinner in the freezer with ...
JIMMY FALLON I don't shoot guns. I don't know how to do that. I grew Upstate New York, so I fought with m...
JIMMY FALLON Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I´d have an excuse.
JIMMY FALLON Don't Keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no ...
JIMMY FALLON I often try to reassure myself by saying, "Well, at least it can´t get any worse." But the truth is...
JIMMY FALLON Researches tested a new form of medical marijuana that treats pain but doesn't get the user high, pr...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... Apple, for adding a camera to the iPod Nano. Now it's just like the iPhone except i...
JIMMY FALLON I was into the Mets because my Dad worked at IBM where he got free Mets tickets, so I was into the M...
JIMMY FALLON I read one chapter of a book and put it down. Thank God for Kindle.
JIMMY FALLON On 'Late Night,' it's like we're all in on the joke. That's what I wanted it to ...
JIMMY FALLON You can't reinvent the wheel. I remember when we first started out at 'Late Night,' we w...
JIMMY FALLON I´m starting to think that I´m the butt of a joke the whole world is in on.
JIMMY FALLON Arnold Schwarzenegger's publicist told USA Today that the actor has not ruled out running for govern...
JIMMY FALLON The Pentagon banned the army from using Chinese-made berets. In a more veiled slap at the Chinese, t...
JIMMY FALLON YOU can wear him to anything. From casual to evening.
JIMMY FALLON It makes me nervous seeing a 20-foot me, like I'm getting too big or something, ... Not that I mind ...
JIMMY FALLON Leno, Conan. They are both really funny. They really know how to land one.
JIMMY FALLON I'd do entire music videos in my bedroom, where I used to stand in front of my television memori...
JIMMY FALLON I just feel like people like a little break. Especially at 12:37 at night, you go, like, 'I'...
JIMMY FALLON New Scientist magazine reported that in the future, cars could be powered by hazelnuts. That's encou...
JIMMY FALLON They say a dog is a man´s best friend.
That´s if you´re lucky enough to get one of those "fri...
JIMMY FALLON I often try to reassure myself by saying, "Well, at least it can´t get any worse." But the truth is...
JIMMY FALLON A Pennsylvania woman convicted for shoplifting was sentenced to wear a badge that reads "Convicted S...
JIMMY FALLON Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I´d have an excuse.
JIMMY FALLON My wife and I got engaged in New Hampshire at this lake house that her family's had forever, and...
JIMMY FALLON They say a dog is a man´s best friend.That´s if you´re lucky enough to get one of those "friendly...
JIMMY FALLON I know what you want. And I know what you need. But I'm gonna screw it up, yeah, cause I'm an idiot....
JIMMY FALLON I honestly, purposely have not gone to therapy because I know some crazy stuff's going to be dra...
JIMMY FALLON Arnold Schwarzenegger's publicist told USA Today that the actor has not ruled out running for go...
JIMMY FALLON Thank you... preseason football, for having all the excitement, commercials, and time-outs of the re...
JIMMY FALLON There couldn't have been a better Hollywood ending for us. It's beyond baseball. It's ro...
JIMMY FALLON The fans were so psyched that someone was doing a movie about a Boston fan that they were giving the...
JIMMY FALLON We picked the Red Sox because they lose. If you root for something that loses for 86 years, you'...
JIMMY FALLON I became a Yankees fan for a few years. But now, I gotta say, I'm really rooting for the Red Sox...
JIMMY FALLON My wife and I had been trying a while to have a baby. We tried a bunch of things - so we had a surro...
JIMMY FALLON When I was a kid, you would tune in to 'The Tonight Show' before you went to sleep. Johnny C...
JIMMY FALLON Love is never worth giving up on.
LEIGH FALLON Based on objective tests of physical impairment, we found that the patients had levels of functional...
BRIAN FALLON The recent availability of 100 percent mortgages and low interest rates means that it is easier than...
BRIAN FALLON unfortunately for many patients it's not the final answer, because some will get better and then rel...
BRIAN FALLON He's been very forthright on that.
BRIAN FALLON The mayor believes that those meetings are about getting things done, not about political bickering.
BRIAN FALLON Not funding the police department does not make you a friend to the taxpayer. It makes you irrespons...
BRIAN FALLON This is going to sound crazy, but... from the moment I first set eyes on you I haven't been able to ...
LEIGH FALLON I don't think I have ever ridden a horse with that turn of foot. I was on a horse that was good enou...
KIEREN FALLON It seems like every game we've played with Jefferson has been hard-fought. There's lots of hitting, ...
FALLON MCCLANAHAN There was something about other people's grief that was so exposing, so personal, that she felt she ...
JANE FALLON There are probably about 50 to 55 that are still in their leather case with the Homestead logo on th...
MARK FALLON We took our shot. We need to unhitch it.
DAN FALLON I'm planning to win, but if I don't, I'm confident that the volume of support I have received will s...
ED FALLON I want to see Republicans and sometimes Democrats stop using the immigrant community as a punching b...
ED FALLON I'm concerned about what happened in South Dakota. The government needs to stay out of people's priv...
ED FALLON What are you trying to protect heterosexual marriages from? There isn't a limited amount of love in ...
ED FALLON You don't have to accept the invitation to get angry. Instead, practice forgiveness, empathy and enc...
DAN FALLON If the worm allowed too much inflammation it might kill the host, so the worm has evolved to reduce ...
PADRAIC FALLON A mile and a quarter (2 km) here, uphill, was always going to suit him.
KIEREN FALLON These executives have irreparably violated the public trust.
ED FALLON To say I was surprised at the events that unfolded is putting it mildly,
KIEREN FALLON What I was really looking for was something more sincere, something real for this moment.
FALLON STUBBS I have learned to be a tolerant person because of you. Today, for me, I forgive you. I accept you. I...
FALLON STUBBS In all honesty, Mr. Rudolph, I would not be who I am today without you. I have learned to be a toler...
FALLON STUBBS I don't think I could have gotten any better of a draw. I saw Carlson this weekend and they're prett...
FALLON MCCLANAHAN It was neck and neck all night long. We had leads of 24-21 and they would rally back. We just could ...
FALLON MCCLANAHAN Overall, we played pretty good. I think we battled. We've lost a lot of close games this year.
FALLON MCCLANAHAN After a slow start, I kind of got my focus back. We started out slow in the beginning, but my team p...
FALLON LUMPKIN Being in close games helps me stay focused. It helps me pitch better and keeps the pressure on me.
FALLON LUMPKIN My teammates played good defense behind me as they always do. It was a really good team effort. I di...
FALLON LUMPKIN A teacher's role is to be informative, but not persuasive. They need to talk to students. They need ...
GAYLE FALLON It's another silver bullet that someone is going to use to fix education.
GAYLE FALLON On our campuses where there is no tolerance for it, we have no problem. Unfortunately, looking at th...
GAYLE FALLON They don't pay their bills with bonuses. They pay their bills with salaries.
GAYLE FALLON Unfortunately, school systems are more often concerned with how their retention numbers look instead...
GAYLE FALLON There are no second chances on this or we could see our schools out of control.
GAYLE FALLON Yesterday took away the opportunity to pretend there was no problem.
GAYLE FALLON That's what I've always strived for, every day, for all of these years.
JACKIE FALLON These wolves are completely terrified of us. They need to be. If they have even a chance at survival...
JACKIE FALLON I know the group was surprised to hear how we feel about trapping. And they are surprised that we bo...
JACKIE FALLON Where wolves live largely depends on human tolerance. Wolf recovery in some ways is more about peopl...
JACKIE FALLON That's exactly how we want them to be. A wolf not scared of people is a dead wolf.
JACKIE FALLON I'll probably start going to Kenney Gym more now that the hours are extended. It's a lot closer to t...
JOE FALLON I was still a little rusty coming back from break in yesterday's game. I felt a lot sharper tonight ...
JOE FALLON It seems that the school has been keeping students up-to-date. Most people already know about the ch...
JOE FALLON Being that I was raised in the Catholic faith, I am very careful about what I choose. I've turne...
SIOBHAN FALLON HOGAN During my senior year, I was supposed to spend a semester student teaching, but decided I couldn'...
SIOBHAN FALLON HOGAN While the concert in and of itself is exciting and the potential endowment dollars are exciting, eve...
DR. SIDNEY FALLON My father was one of 11. He was an attorney. My mother worked for the Syracuse newspaper as a column...
SIOBHAN FALLON HOGAN Love is an ice cream sundae, with all the marvelous coverings. Sex is the cherry on top.
JIMMY DEAN We must adjust to changing times and still hold to unchanging principles.
JIMMY CARTER No matter what Sarah Palin and these geniuses she surrounds herself with try to tell you, climate ch...
JIMMY KIMMEL I believe every guitar player inherently has something unique about their playing. They just have to...
JIMMY PAGE I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means.
JIMMY KIMMEL Poverty was the greatest motivating factor in my life.
JIMMY DEAN Be kind to people on the way up - you'll meet them again on your way down.
JIMMY DURANTE I do have a treadmill desk in my office, and for a while, I would walk on it while checking email an...
JIMMY KIMMEL A fundamentalist can't bring himself or herself to negotiate with people who disagree with them ...
JIMMY CARTER I have a lot of stories to tell because I've been down a lot of roads people haven't been.
JIMMY WALKER To deal with individual human needs at the everyday level can be noble sometimes.
JIMMY CARTER There are no right and wrong ways to work in this business, but there are some basic common-sense pr...
JIMMY SMITS Those of Manhattan are the brokers on Wall Street and they talk of people who went to the same colle...
JIMMY BRESLIN Over four or five years, I did six albums with three people: John Lennon, Bruce Springsteen, and Pat...
JIMMY IOVINE Bruce Springsteen gave people faith in rock & roll and in themselves again.
JIMMY IOVINE My life changed because Bruce Springsteen got on a mic in front of me.
JIMMY IOVINE Donald Trump handles these nitwit reporters with a new and most disgraceful form of bribery.
JIMMY BRESLIN I was brought up in the Boys' Brigade and grew up not swearing. It's so lovely to behave dec...
JIMMY HILL The music business used to carry a certain amount of brotherly love, but it isn't that way now.
JIMMY RUSHING I was a hard-workin' little boy. Oh, I worked. Pullin' cotton, shockin' grain, cuttin...
JIMMY DEAN My favorite song? 'Amazing Grace.' Anybody singing it. But the best it'll ever be done i...
JIMMY DEAN You know you're getting old when you go to more funerals than you do weddings.
JIMMY DEAN I've seen so many people in this business that made a fortune. They get old and broke and can...
JIMMY DEAN I used to help my granddaddy make sausage. He would mix it up in a cleaned-out washtub with his hand...
JIMMY DEAN I made more money yesterday than I ever thought I'd make in an entire lifetime. But it's lik...
JIMMY DEAN A lot of things I am, and a lot of things I am not. But I think I'm about as good an American as...
JIMMY DEAN When I was a kid, I used to think, 'Man, if I could ever afford all the ice cream I want to eat,...
JIMMY DEAN I think the kids in school that laughed at the clothes that we wore and the house that we lived in, ...
JIMMY DEAN I went further on less talent than anyone, but I was a damned good entertainer.
JIMMY DEAN Do what you say you're going to do. And try to do it a little better than you said you would.
JIMMY DEAN Sausage is a great deal like life. You get out of it about what you put into it.
JIMMY DEAN I definitely feel pressure to keep slim. I don't want to be the guy who lost weight and gained i...
JIMMY KIMMEL Becoming a parent has changed the risk calculus for me. But it might be age, too, and seeing a lot o...
JIMMY CHIN People say, 'Are you insane?' But the most successful climbers are the most calculating, wit...
JIMMY CHIN On Monday and Thursday, I eat fewer than 500 calories a day; then I eat like a pig for the other fiv...
JIMMY KIMMEL My first guitar was like a campfire guitar. And it was left at a house that my family had moved into...
JIMMY PAGE Just give me a good role that allows me to hone my craft, and I am a pretty happy camper.
JIMMY SMITS I think it's prima facie evidence for the existence of God because for me to grow up and actuall...
JIMMY WEBB I busted out of the place in a hurry and went to a saloon and drank beer and said that for the rest ...
JIMMY BRESLIN I feel great. I had a triple bypass in 1976 and a quadruple bypass in 1984.
JIMMY PIERSALL After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the ...
JIMMY CARR Unfortunately, after Sept. 11, there was an outburst in America of intense suffering and patriotism,...
JIMMY CARTER Politics, where fat, bald, disagreeable men, unable to be candidates themselves, teach a president h...
JIMMY BRESLIN I'm gonna be blunt and plain, if one ever looks at me like that I'm gonna kill him and tell ...
JIMMY SWAGGART A rat race is for rats. We're not rats. We're human beings. Reject the insidious pressures i...
JIMMY REID Parliamentarian rules, the rules of the House, how you get bills referred, really the nuts and bolts...
JIMMY GOMEZ For true success ask yourself these four questions: Why? Why not? Why not me? Why not now?.
JIMMY DEAN I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.
JIMMY DEAN There was promulgation of false propaganda by the administration about the existence of weapons of m...
JIMMY CARTER A rabid sports fan is one that boos a TV set.
JIMMY CANNON 'Boogie Chillen',' by John Lee Hooker - that is a riff.
JIMMY PAGE Isolation doesn't bother me at all. It gives me a sense of security.
JIMMY PAGE When I was still in the Yardbirds, our producer, Mickie Most, would always try to get us to record a...
JIMMY PAGE If you see a blatant error or misconception about yourself, you really want to set it straight.
JIMMY WALES I don't want to tell President Obama how to make a speech. He's a much better speech maker t...
JIMMY CARTER The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra.
JIMMY JOHNSON Never treat your audience as customers, always as partners.
JIMMY STEWART We should live our lives as though Christ was coming this afternoon.
JIMMY CARTER A strong nation, like a strong person, can afford to be gentle, firm, thoughtful, and restrained. It...
JIMMY CARTER My vocation is more in composition really than anything else -- building up harmonies using the guit...
JIMMY PAGE I may have faults, but being wrong ain't one of them.
JIMMY HOFFA The office of president is a bastardized thing, half royalty and half democracy that nobody knows wh...
JIMMY BRESLIN Older and wiser voices can always help you find the right path, if you are only willing to listen.
JIMMY BUFFETT Some people never find it, some only pretend, but I just want to live happily ever after every now a...
JIMMY BUFFETT We should live our lives as though Christ were coming this afternoon.
JIMMY CARTER Our decision about energy will test the character of the American people and the ability of the Pres...
JIMMY CARTER According to Gandhi, the seven sins are wealth without works, pleasure without conscience, knowledge...
JIMMY CARTER I thought a lot about our Nation and what I should do as President. And Sunday night before last, I ...
JIMMY CARTER Well, as you know, there are many things in life that are not fair, that wealthy people can afford a...
JIMMY CARTER All political power is primarily an illusion. Illusion. Mirrors and blue smoke, beautiful blue smoke...
JIMMY BRESLIN Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever studied, writing columns for news...
JIMMY BRESLIN I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.
JIMMY DEAN You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can.
JIMMY CARTER New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there. Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make y...
JIMMY CONNORS But why should I read what somebody else thinks of my life when I know the real story?
JIMMY CONNORS I hate to lose more than I love to win.
JIMMY CONNORS People say I'm around because I have a lot of heart, but I know all the heart in the world couldn't ...
JIMMY CONNORS Tennis was never work for me, tennis was fun. And the tougher the battle and the longer the match, t...
JIMMY CONNORS If someone wants a piece of you, never let them pay. What you do not give to them time takes anyway.
JIMMY BUFFETT Be awfully nice to them going up, because you're gonna meet them all coming down.
JIMMY DURANTE