A drug is neither moral nor immoral -- it's a chemical compound. The compound itself is not a menace to society until a human being treats it as if consumption bestowed a temporary license to act like an asshole.


Frank Zappa

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There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
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Out of my mind! Back in five minutes.
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Suggestions or comments on this site? Send an email -Frank Zappa.
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In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
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You can't always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to...
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A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the a...
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Without deviation progress is not possible.
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If we were the Monkees, we'd be ready by now.
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Fact of the matter is, there is no hip world, there is no straight world. There's a world, you see, ...
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Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something,...
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There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we'd all love one...
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Movin' to Montana soon Gonna be a dental floss tycoon
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Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which ...
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It is always advisable to be a loser if you cannot become a winner
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The computer can't tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, ...
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All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.
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I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out ther...
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Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.
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The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable.
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Jesus will think you're a jerk. And it would be true.
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If you want to get together in any exclusive situation and have people love you, fine- but to hang a...
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No, I don't think people really give a shit about that (meeting one's maker) unless they're complete...
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If classical music is the state of the art, then the arts are in a sad state
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Most people wouldn't know music if it came up and bit them on the ass.
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The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced
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I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
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I don't want to see any religious people in public office because they're working for another boss
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Those Jesus freaks, well they're friendly but, the shit they believe has got their minds all shut
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Stupidity has a certain charm - ignorance does not
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I believe that people have a right to decide their own destiny; people own themselves. I also believ...
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The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own
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Do you love it - do you hate it? There it is the way you made it
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too expensive and too violent.
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Fact of the matter is, there is no hip world, there is no straight world. There's a world, you see, ...
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The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place ...
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Some people crave baseball - I find this unfathomable but I can easily understand why a person could...
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People, wake up Figure it out Religious fanatics Around and about The Court House, The State House, ...
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Music is always a commentary on society.
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I searched for years I found no love. I'm sure that love will never be a product of plasticity.
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One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agre...
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If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they'll murder you in your sleep
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I think pop music has done more for oral intercourse than anything else that ever happened, and vice...
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It would be easier to pay off the national debt overnight than to neutralize the long-range effects ...
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Anything, Any time, Anywhere - for no Reason at All.
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The most important thing in art is the frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively ...
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I like to watch the news, because I don't like people very much and when you watch the news ... if y...
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The United States is a nation of laws, badly written and randomly enforced.
FRANK ZAPPA
One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agre...
FRANK ZAPPA
Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.
FRANK ZAPPA
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind o...
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There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the...
FRANK ZAPPA
Government is the Entertainment division of the military-industrial complex.
FRANK ZAPPA
I'm vile and perverted.
I'm obsessed and deranged.
I've existed for years but very little...
FRANK ZAPPA
Take the Kama Sutra. How many people died from the Kama Sutra as opposed to the Bible? Who wins?
FRANK ZAPPA
There's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
FRANK ZAPPA
Music is the only religion that delivers the goods.
FRANK ZAPPA
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as f...
FRANK ZAPPA
The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the po...
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It's better to have something to remember than anything to regret.
FRANK ZAPPA
Drop out of school before your mind rots from exposure to our mediocre educational system. Forget ab...
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Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?'
Frank Zappa: 'You have...
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Definition of rock journalism: People who can't write, doing interviews with people who can't think,...
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Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny.
FRANK ZAPPA
Information is not knowledge.
Knowledge is not wisdom.
Wisdom is not truth.
Truth is ...
FRANK ZAPPA
Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.
FRANK ZAPPA
A true Zen saying: "Nothing is what I want.
FRANK ZAPPA
May your shit come to life and kiss you on the face.
FRANK ZAPPA
I wrote a song about dental floss but did anyone's teeth get cleaner?
FRANK ZAPPA
I detest love lyrics. I think one of the causes of bad mental health in the United States is that pe...
FRANK ZAPPA
For the record, folks; I never took a shit on stage and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywh...
FRANK ZAPPA
The Ultimate Rule ought to be: 'If it sounds GOOD to you, it's bitchin'; if it sounds BAD to YOU, it...
FRANK ZAPPA
The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has a medieval aroma, like the days when everythin...
FRANK ZAPPA
You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of...
FRANCIS VINCENT “FRANK” ZAPPA, JR.
Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.
FRANCIS VINCENT “FRANK” ZAPPA, JR.
When we had to do book reports, I would pick a book that no one read and just make it up and turn th...
AHMET ZAPPA
The way this whole novel thing came together was, I sold them one bill of goods and then didn't comm...
AHMET ZAPPA
I picked books by their covers - the worse the cover, the more I wanted to read it.
AHMET ZAPPA
I miss my Dad. My Dad loved cheesy monster movies, so we'd have Godzilla movie marathons. Those are ...
AHMET ZAPPA
I had this whole ritual with my mother making the bed with me inside it so I would be invisible.
AHMET ZAPPA
I collect things that just look retarded.
AHMET ZAPPA
All the drawings are mine. Originally, the idea I sold to Random House was an illustrated recipe boo...
AHMET ZAPPA
I would ask my parents something, but then go to my siblings. We were encouraged to bounce ideas off...
AHMET ZAPPA
About the only thing that I'll probably end up doing is I made this amplifier with Peavey. It...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I really want younger audience members to see kids in their early 20's playing Frank's music...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
Yes, but I view Frank's music as fully composed. In other words, the arrangements can work for a...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
There are so many things that are misunderstood or not recognized about my father's music becaus...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I miss my Dad. My Dad loved cheesy monster movies, so we'd have Godzilla movie marathons. Those ...
AHMET ZAPPA
I didn't really hear any other music other than what my dad was working on until I was 12. My re...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I definitely have managed to overcome dyslexia now to become a fully functional human being but thin...
AHMET ZAPPA
The music that is played on the radio all the time or written about in magazines has nothing to do w...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
We will have close to 3 months of rehearsals to learn about 30 songs. Frank usually rehearsed a band...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I would love to expose multiple younger generations to Frank's music. It's not an easy task ...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
My parents told us how they felt but never imposed their beliefs on us, although I appreciate I got ...
AHMET ZAPPA
I think what my father appreciated was the science experiment of life. He had these kids, and they h...
AHMET ZAPPA
I didn't read at all until I was 12. I just couldn't. It was too frustrating.
AHMET ZAPPA
At 12 I dropped out of school but I had lost interest in it at a much earlier age. For me, school wa...
AHMET ZAPPA
I've always wanted to have a book published - it was a dream of mine, but the thought of actuall...
AHMET ZAPPA
The way this whole novel thing came together was, I sold them one bill of goods and then didn't ...
AHMET ZAPPA
My father would often work all night and sleep during the day, so for us, dinner might be pancakes, ...
AHMET ZAPPA
Just because something has tubes doesn't mean it's the best. I mean, tubes are obviously goo...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
There's no difference in a lot of people's minds between good musicians and popular musician...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I don't care about a social life.
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I know my name gets used illegally all the time all over the internet. You know, it is a trademarked...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
But the reality is when you write a song, you should be able to strip away all the instruments and j...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
And, you know, my dad would show me some things sometimes, but the best things that I got to do were...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
For me, the most difficult thing is that I am learning melodies on guitar from some songs whose melo...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
Frank's bands could play the hardest stuff and make it seem like no big deal.
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I mean, no offense, but I don't really see why, like guitar players from Creed, or something lik...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
It was spontaneously composed as I was playing it. And then I added a couple of other overdub textur...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
Music can be so disturbing and frustrating. I mean the business side of it. The actual making music ...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
Well, Steve Vai joined my dad's band right around the time when I actually started playing guita...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
While it is true that Frank had a great sense of humor, he was also very serious about composing mus...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
I feel that through my father's music I've found my own voice in my own playing.
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
The thing with food is that you can give 20 people the same recipe and the same ingredients, and som...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
Modern records are all made with virtually identical gear, software plug-ins and everything. Everybo...
DWEEZIL ZAPPA
My Dad was so open creatively that I was off in search of black turtleneck bathing suits with long s...
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
I spent most of my life locked in my bedroom, miserable about my raging acne.
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
Gag me with a spoon!
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
I would think: Stay close to the implants! They must know something because they keep getting asked ...
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
The idea of licking stamps seemed great fun for me.
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
I peaked early. I was told I'd missed my boat.
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
I had a friend whose family had dinner together. The mother would tuck you in at night and make brea...
MOON UNIT ZAPPA
boys, girls and music . . why do they need gin?
FRANK
Whoever is happy will make others happy too.
ANNE FRANK
The best music happens when you have a personal connection to it. That same philosophy can extend to...
FRANK IERO
I'm not one of those complicated, mixed-up cats. I'm not looking for the secret to life... I...
FRANK SINATRA
The best revenge is massive success.
FRANK SINATRA
Mobile video is now a reality and a force to be reckoned with. I think it is essential to think abou...
ZE FRANK
I've been super impressed with what BuzzFeed has done on Facebook with inspiring list posts and ...
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We have this incredible ability to communicate with each other. I want to play around with it, see w...
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For some reason, we stopped getting gold stars at some age. It's time to bring them back.
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If you want to get into the creative world, you have to just keep flogging away even when nobody'...
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I consider creativity to be a more non-rational, subconscious thing. You have a relationship to your...
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YouTube has become more mature, both as a platform and as a community. So much content has been adde...
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I'm fascinated by simple joy.
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We can't all be like Ryan Seacrest... the perfect platform manifestation of a human. I don't...
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What better way to connect with people than by staring and talking straight at them? Don't blink...
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I'm obsessed with media and the way audiences can become creative participants.
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I've been fascinated by the Internet from the very start. In 2001, I had made a funny black-and-...
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In an ever-changing technological landscape, where today's platforms are not tomorrow's plat...
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Trust is a confusing thing. It seems so simple, but when you try to pin it down, it can be so elusiv...
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Anything that makes you feel the most alone also has the greatest power to connect you.
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Most of us yearn for really intimate, healthy, in-person relationships. People have a deep desire to...
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The naked mole is, like, the ugliest freakin' creature in the world. It is so radically, unbelie...
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When I was young, I had this feeling that there was this handbook that I had never gotten that expla...
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On street corners everywhere, people are looking at their cell phones, and it's easy to dismiss ...
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I studied neuroscience at the cellular level, so I was looking at learning and memory in the visual ...
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The story of technology seems to go up and then retract into simplicity again.
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I think this is one of the greatest gifts of this era: Because of the Internet, we can start to type...
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Let me think about the people who I care about the most, and how when they fail or disappoint me... ...
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A good procrastination should feel like you're inserting lots and lots of commas into the senten...
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