Being with a friend in great pain is not easy. It makes us uncomfortable. We do not know what to do or what to say, and we worry about how to respond to what we hear. Our temptation is to say things that come more out of our own fear than out of our care for the person in pain. Sometimes we say things like 'Well, you’re doing a lot better than yesterday,' or 'You will soon be your old self again,' or 'I’m sure you will get over this.' But often we know that what we’re saying is not true, and our friends know it too. We do not have to play games with each other. We can simply say: 'I am your friend, I am happy to be with you.' We can say that in words or with touch or with loving silence. Sometimes it is good to say: 'You don’t have to talk. Just close your eyes. I am here with you, thinking of you, praying for you, loving you.
Henri J.M. Nouwen
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More Henri J.M. Nouwen
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BARRIE Colpo di fulmine. The thunderbolt, as Italians call it. When love strikes someone like lightning, so... J.M. DARHOWER I don't know what you do about sex and I don't want to know, but this is not the way to go about it.... J.M. COETZEE Ana Magdalena nods. For an instant the blue eyes fix on his. 'She sees straight through me', he thin... J.M. COETZEE No Soul is identical – yet all Souls are unified. J.M. HARRISON The door', replied Maimie, 'will always, always be open, and mother will always be waiting at it for... J.M. BARRIE I’m gonna take a nap, Heaven,” he said, wanting away from her to clear his head. He didn’t lik... J.M. DARHOWER Who are you anyway? What are you even doing here?” “Haven,” she said quietly, peeking at ... J.M. DARHOWER The last thing he ever said to me was, 'Just always be waiting for me, and then some night you will ... J.M. BARRIE So come with me, where dreams are born, and time is never planned. Just think of happy things, and y... J.M. BARRIE Trivial facts are often the best hints to what is going on. J.M. ROBERTS What I’ve come to realize I that I don’t like action for action’s sake. Mindless explosions, s... J.M. RICHARDS A girl would be lucky to have you, but not like this, Carmine. Not the way you treat people now. You... J.M. DARHOWER His head exploded. I’d never seen someone’s head explode. I never thought I would. Maybe in the ... J.M. SULLIVAN Stacey muttered, "But I hate this school, and this city, and the sooner I leave, the better. I want ... J.M. REEP To live will be an awfully big adventure. J.M. BARRIE Shoot the Wendybird! J.M. BARRIE Mrs. Darling loved to have everything just so, and Mr. Darling had a passion for being exactly like ... J.M. BARRIE Peter was not with them for the moment, and they felt rather lonely up there by themselves. He could... J.M. BARRIE Feeling that Peter was on his way back, the Neverland had again woke into life. We ought to use the ... J.M. BARRIE Our heroine knew that the mother would always leave the window open for her children to fly back by;... J.M. BARRIE Of all the delectable islands the Neverland is the snuggest and most compact, not large and sprawly,... J.M. BARRIE I am the best there ever was! J.M. BARRIE He was a poet; and they are never exactly grown-up. J.M. BARRIE One could mention many lovable traits in Smee. For instance, after killing, it was his spectacles he... J.M. BARRIE Wendy, Wendy, when you are sleeping in your silly bed you might be flying about with me saying funny... J.M. BARRIE But where do you live mostly now?" With the lost boys." Who are they?" They are the c... J.M. BARRIE Tink was not all bad: or, rather, she was all bad just now, but, on the other hand, sometimes she wa... J.M. BARRIE Why can't you fly now, mother?" "Because I am grown up, dearest. When people grow up they forge... J.M. BARRIE She asked where he lived. Second to the right,' said Peter, 'and then straight on till m... J.M. BARRIE Build a house?" exclaimed John. "For the Wendy," said Curly. "For Wendy?" John... J.M. BARRIE Two is the beginning of the end. J.M. BARRIE Forever is a very long time Peter J.M. BARRIE After you have been unfair to him he will love you again, but he will never afterwards be quite the ... J.M. BARRIE Wendy," Peter Pan continued in a voice that no woman has ever yet been able to resist, "Wendy, one g... J.M. BARRIE When the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all... J.M. BARRIE It was not really Saturday night, at least it may have been, for they had long lost count of the day... J.M. BARRIE Stars are beautiful, but they may not take an active part in anything, they must just look on for ev... J.M. BARRIE Can anything harm us, mother, after the night-lights are lit?" Nothing, precious," she said; "t... J.M. BARRIE I taught you to fight and to fly. What more could there be? J.M. BARRIE If you cannot teach me to fly, teach me to sing. J.M. BARRIE Stars are beautiful, but they may not take part in anything, they must just look on forever. J.M. BARRIE Do you believe in fairies?...If you believe, clap your hands! J.M. BARRIE Stars are beautiful, but they must not take an active part in anything, they must just look on forev... J.M. BARRIE I stretched out my arms and laid my palms on the earth, and, yes, the rocking persisted, the rocking... J.M. COETZEE Leah looked at her parents, lost in their own fantasies, and decided that the three of them were a p... J.M. REEP We walked to dinner, ate together, and talked nearly the whole time. I was amazed that I had as much... J.M. RICHARDS Sir, you are both ungallant and deficient! How am I deficient? You're just a boy. J.M. BARRIE I'm youth, I'm joy, I'm a little bird that has broken out of the egg. J.M. BARRIE David tells me that fairies never say 'We feel happy': what they say is, 'We feel dancey'. J.M. BARRIE I don’t know if you have ever seem a map of a person’s mind. Doctors sometimes draw maps of othe... J.M. BARRIE Become major, Paul. Live like a hero. That's what the classics teach us. Be a main character. Otherw... J.M. COETZEE If you have it [love], you don't need to have anything else, and if you don't have it, it doesn't ma... J.M. BARRIE Yes, you see, there’s no such thing as coincidence. There are no accidents in life. Everything tha... J.M. DARHOWER Peter,' she asked, trying to speak firmly, 'what are your exact feelings for me?' Those of a de... J.M. BARRIE (I)f we are going to be kind, let it be out of simple generosity, not because we fear guilt or retri... J.M. COETZEE All children, except one, grow up. They soon know that they will grow up, and the way Wendy knew was... J.M. BARRIE His own opinion, which he does not air, is that the origin of speech lie in song, and the origins of... J.M. COETZEE Go for it, while you can. I know you have it in you. And I can't promise you'll get everything you w... J.M. DARHOWER I'm not young enough to know everything. J.M. BARRIE You can play it safe, and I wouldn't blame you for it. You can continue as you've been doing, and yo... J.M. DARHOWER I did it again. Lying guilty in a hotel room for a woman I will fail for. J.M. AUGUST