Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.


Groucho Marx

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Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Blessed are they that mour...
ANONYMOUS
Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: fo...
BIBLE
The world would not be in such a snarl,/ had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl.
IRVING BERLIN
The world would not be in such a snarl, had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl.
IRVING BERLIN
I was always a fan of Groucho Marx as a kid.
MICHAEL FELDMAN
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX
I’ll put off reading Lolita for six more years until she turns 18.
GROUCHO MARX
Blessed are the merciful; for they shall obtain mercy.
MATHEW; BIBLE
Blessed are the curious, for they shall have adventures.
LOVELLE DRACHMAN
Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth
BIBLE
Blessed are the merciful; for they shall obtain mercy. Mathew
BIBLE
Blessed are the merciful; for they shall obtain mercy. [Mathew].
BIBLE
Blessed are those who eat greens, for they shall keep their teeth. Blessed are those who wash their ...
DIANA GABALDON
Beauty is the light within. Only when you see the light within yourself will others see it in you.
F. JOHNSON
Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
HERBERT HOOVER
Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt
HERBERT HOOVER
Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.
HERBERT HOOVER
The English are mentioned in the Bible: Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth
MARK TWAIN
Blessed are the sleepy ones: for they shall soon nod off.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
BIBLE
Up there with my awards, I have a great big statue of Groucho Marx, just to put everything in perspe...
JOHN LITHGOW
Throughout my life, there are four people I've met who were truly original people. The other thr...
ALICE COOPER
Blessed are they who expect nothing for they shall not be dissapointed! -Unknown.
UNKNOWN
Blessed are those that nought expect, For they shall not be disappointed.
JOHN WALCOT
Blessed are those who imitate us for they shall inherit our faults.
JACINTO BENAVENTE
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall take flack from both sides."- Unofficial UN Motto
ROBERT LYNN ASPRIN
Mrs. Lynde says, 'Blessed are they who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed.
L.M. MONTGOMERY
Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.
BIBLE
Blessed are those that know the path out of their carnal flesh, for they shall attain intuition.
MICHAEL BASSEY JOHNSON
It has to do with seeing God. “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Matthew 5...
JOHN PIPER
Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken.
ALBERT CAMUS
When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell...
LINDA KAGE
Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say "attaboy".
CHRISTOPHER MOORE
The genius of the Marx Brothers is for parody. They never are themselves. They exist too abundantly ...
MARK VAN DOREN
I was changing a light bulb over Groucho Marx's bed, so I took my shoes off, got on his bed and ...
ELLIOTT GOULD
And as for him whose good deeds are light, these are they who shall have lost their souls, abiding i...
QURAN
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. Life is a ...
GROUCHO MARX
Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused. -Anonymous.
ANONYMOUS
For, behold, the days are coming, in the which they shall say, Blessed are the barren, and the wombs...
BIBLE
Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you
GROUCHO MARX
The real achievement of Woody Allen was that he was making movies that felt very personal, and for a...
NOAH BAUMBACH
My icons do not raise up the blessed savior in elaborate cathedrals. They are constructed concentrat...
DAN FLAVIN
Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the Earth.
ABRAHAM LINCOLN
I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come ...
GROUCHO MARX
"Blessed are those, who don't have money to spare for share market, for they shall never loss their ...
DR HITESH C SHETH
Let us give thanks for our shadows
for they are there in the first place
because of the pr...
KAMAND KOJOURI
People often believed they were safer in the light, thinking monsters only came out at night.
C.J. ROBERTS
It was frustrating to still be in the dark about something and be given only so little light.
LAUREN LOLA
It is now lighted, Let's enjoy the Light, learn and walk in the Light so we may see the rough roads ...
VICTOR SUR
True spirituality does not require the need of an external middleman or mediator (priest, rabbi, gur...
THE INNER LIGHT
Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves for we shall never cease to be amused.
UNKNOWN
Darkness is nothing
but an opportunity
to spread light
JACKIE VIRAMONTEZ
If we believe in the Blessed Saviour, we shall be saved.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA
If we believed in the blessed Saviour, we shall be saved.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA
For I say unto you, Ye shall not see me henceforth, till ye shall say, Blessed is he that cometh in ...
BIBLE
Blessed is he who talks in circles, for he shall become a big wheel.
FRANK DANE
She was intimidating and all I could do was sit back on the couch as she paced back and forth, slowl...
IN THE MAKING
Blessed is he that works in the temple of imagination,for his days shall be filled with abundance.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN)
If we all look at life we think how nice, then we look at death and everybody goes oh you can say th...
GARY F EVANS...
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
JESUS CHRIST
So, tomorrow, I'm leaving. And I'm not going to let that happen again with anyone else. I'm going to...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY
I like to exhilarate the audience like Groucho Marx exhilarated me when I was a kid. Also, I enjoy d...
FRANK FERRANTE
Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
JESUS CHRIST
Let there be light! Abba! Father, let there be light!
In our dark moments we cry; let there be ...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
The past is behind, learn from it. The future is ahead, prepare for it. The present is here, live it...
THOMAS S. MONSON
I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it
GROUCHO MARX
Blessed is the man who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed was the ninth beatitude.
ALEXANDER POPE
"Blessed is the man who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed" was the ninth beatitude
ALEXANDER POPE
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
ALEXANDER POPE
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
Blessed is he who expects nothing for he shall never be disappointed.
ALEXANDER POPE
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
JONATHAN SWIFT
Blessed is he that expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
What will make you a star is in you
SOTONYE ANGA
Light is found on the green.
J.R. RIM
Blessed are the forgetful; for they get over their stupidities, too.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
And thou shalt make the seven lamps thereof: and they shall light the lamps thereof, that they may g...
BIBLE
Whoever blessings, shall be abundantly blessed.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA
Truly the light is sweet, and a pleasant thing it is for the eyes to behold the sun: But if a man li...
COMPTON GAGE
Truly the light is sweet, and a pleasant thing it is for the eyes to behold the sun: But if a man li...
ECCLESIASTES 11: 7 & 8
Blessed are the forgetful: for they get the better even of their blunders.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
Blessed are the forgetful; for they get the better even of their blunders
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
Blessed are the blind, for they know not enough to ask why
ERNEST RENAN
Blessed are the blind, for they know not enough to ask why.
ERNEST RENAN
Now is the only time we have, and the only time that we have any control over.
RICHARD CARLSON
In the beginning, there was nothing and from nothing came our species then behold the dawn of music....
GARY F EVANS...
Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of lif...
BIBLE
Blessed is the man that endureth temptation for when he is tried he shall receive the crown of life.
BIBLE
Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of li...
NEW TESTAMENT JAMES, CHAPTER 1, VERSE 12:
May the Father be gracious according to your needs.Dear Father preserve their life,relieve them of p...
SHELLEY E WILLIAMS
She would tuck Sam into her heart, a bright light for her to take out whenever things were darkest.
SARAH J. MAAS
Blessed is he whose vineyard is filled with the crop called imagination,for hunger shall be his enem...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN)
Let go, let life, and enjoy the journey…!
JAMES A. MURPHY
When we put LIVE backwards it spells EVIL, interesting how one word can have two totally opposing me...
GARY F EVANS...
Light falls upon a dew drop; rewarding all who are blessed to witness the moments of its glisten.
TRUTH DEVOUR
Everyone shall be given their ceremonial send-off after their marriage. O Nanak, blessed are the hap...
SRI GURU GRANTH SAHIB
When you live in the present, the past is forgotten & the future takes care of itself.
MANDY HALE
They are not dead who live in lives they leave behind; In those whom they have blessed, they live a ...
HUGH ROBERT ORR
Light a light; wherever you are, you will be found, you shall be discovered!
MEHMET MURAT ILDAN

More Groucho Marx

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
GROUCHO MARX
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
GROUCHO MARX
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
GROUCHO MARX
I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west ...
GROUCHO MARX
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX
Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX
I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARX
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
GROUCHO MARX
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men--the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARX
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
GROUCHO MARX
One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife.
GROUCHO MARX
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
GROUCHO MARX
No man goes before his time -- unless the boss leaves early.
GROUCHO MARX
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARX
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can't fool around. If you write about som...
GROUCHO MARX
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
GROUCHO MARX
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day...
GROUCHO MARX
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open
GROUCHO MARX
Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go...
GROUCHO MARX
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and...
GROUCHO MARX
I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yes...
GROUCHO MARX
I am so broke, I can't even afford to fill up my bicycle.
GROUCHO MARX
How does the healthy dog bark? Ruff Ruff.
How does the cold dog bark ? Scarf Scarf.
How...
GROUCHO MARX
I think it is good that books still exist, but they do make me sleepy.
GROUCHO MARX
I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.
GROUCHO MARX
Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.
GROUCHO MARX
Friends are chocolate chips in the cookie of life!
GROUCHO MARX
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna p...
GROUCHO MARX
I'm a Nillionaire. I have little to no money!
GROUCHO MARX
One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.
GROUCHO MARX
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
GROUCHO MARX
A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
GROUCHO MARX
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
GROUCHO MARX
When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell...
GROUCHO MARX
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARX
I worked myself up from nothing to extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARX
Look at me. I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARX
Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX
Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early ...
GROUCHO MARX
I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX
There is one way to find out if a man is honest; ask him! If he says yes you know he's crooked.
GROUCHO MARX
There is no sweeter sound than the crumbling of ones fellow man.
GROUCHO MARX
I eat like a vulture. Unfortunately the resemblance doesn't end there.
GROUCHO MARX
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARX
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make d...
GROUCHO MARX
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
GROUCHO MARX
I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
GROUCHO MARX
My mother loved children--she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX
Whoever named it necking is a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX
No man goes before his time / unless the boss leaves early.
GROUCHO MARX
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. Life is a ...
GROUCHO MARX
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying the w...
GROUCHO MARX
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARX
While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
GROUCHO MARX
I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and rea...
GROUCHO MARX
If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX
The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words....
GROUCHO MARX
Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARX
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
GROUCHO MARX
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX
In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom.
GROUCHO MARX
I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
GROUCHO MARX
I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course.
GROUCHO MARX
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
GROUCHO MARX
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
GROUCHO MARX
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I...
GROUCHO MARX
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
GROUCHO MARX
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
GROUCHO MARX
Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
GROUCHO MARX
I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.
GROUCHO MARX
I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
GROUCHO MARX
Humor is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.
GROUCHO MARX
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
GROUCHO MARX
I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.
GROUCHO MARX
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
GROUCHO MARX
I've got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX
I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
GROUCHO MARX
He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
GROUCHO MARX
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARX
I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yes...
GROUCHO MARX
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and app...
GROUCHO MARX
I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
GROUCHO MARX
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
GROUCHO MARX
Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
GROUCHO MARX
Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX
All geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARX
There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he...
GROUCHO MARX
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every...
GROUCHO MARX
We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her sta...
GROUCHO MARX
I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a ...
GROUCHO MARX
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
GROUCHO MARX
I do not care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
GROUCHO MARX
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARX
My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX
There is no sweeter sound than the crumbling of one's fellow man.
GROUCHO MARX
She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the live of the party.
GROUCHO MARX
I'd horsewhip you if I had a horse.
GROUCHO MARX
In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and ...
GROUCHO MARX
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book -and does
GROUCHO MARX
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I...
GROUCHO MARX
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARX
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
GROUCHO MARX
There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says, "Yes," you know he is a crook.
GROUCHO MARX
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is han...
GROUCHO MARX
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX
It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.
GROUCHO MARX
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
GROUCHO MARX
I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THA...
GROUCHO MARX
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX
I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows ...
GROUCHO MARX
Go, and never darken my towels again.
GROUCHO MARX
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day ...
GROUCHO MARX
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long e...
GROUCHO MARX
My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
GROUCHO MARX
We dont like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Well, art is art, isnt it? Still, on t...
GROUCHO MARX
I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX
Women should be obscene and not heard.
GROUCHO MARX
Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough
GROUCHO MARX
I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure
GROUCHO MARX
The secret of success is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake those, you’ve got it made.”
GROUCHO MARX
Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?
GROUCHO MARX
My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you ...
GROUCHO MARX
My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually te...
GROUCHO MARX
Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
GROUCHO MARX
If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price ...
GROUCHO MARX
Don’t ever underestimate the importance of money. I know it’s often been said that money won’t...
GROUCHO MARX
I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library ...
GROUCHO MARX
You've got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it
GROUCHO MARX
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
GROUCHO MARX
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX
[When Judy Garland lost the 1954 best actress Oscar to Grace Kelly in] The Country Girl, ... Dear Ju...
GROUCHO MARX
I was so long writing my review that I never got around to reading the book.
GROUCHO MARX
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does
GROUCHO MARX
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana
GROUCHO MARX
Money will not make you happy, and happy will not make you money
GROUCHO MARX
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men, the other 999 follow women
GROUCHO MARX
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX
Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have...
GROUCHO MARX
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
GROUCHO MARX
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, and I'm going to be happy in it...
GROUCHO MARX
I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX
If you're not having fun, you're doing something wrong.
GROUCHO MARX
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I'll never know.
GROUCHO MARX
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
GROUCHO MARX
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I...
GROUCHO MARX
It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.
GROUCHO MARX
Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member
GROUCHO MARX
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but ...
GROUCHO MARX
Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
GROUCHO MARX
I'm giving you 30 days to live.
GROUCHO MARX
She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party
GROUCHO MARX
Believe me, you have to get up early if you want to get out of bed
GROUCHO MARX
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
GROUCHO MARX
And I want to thank you for all the enjoyment you've taken out of it.
GROUCHO MARX
Remember, we're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably far more than she's ever done!
GROUCHO MARX
Hey, when I said work fast, I didn't mean your friend, I meant the maid.
GROUCHO MARX
Marriage is a wonderful institution...but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX
I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that
GROUCHO MARX
A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX
Blood's not thicker than money
GROUCHO MARX
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
GROUCHO MARX
Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!
GROUCHO MARX
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX
Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?
A: Someone who stay...
GROUCHO MARX
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX
Outside of a dog, a man's best friend is a book. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX
Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I...
GROUCHO MARX
I cannot say that I do not disagree with you
GROUCHO MARX
I would never belong to a group that would accept someone like me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX
Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore, I realized it was killing conversation. Wh...
GROUCHO MARX
Remember men, we're fighting for this woman's honor; which is probably more than she ever did.
GROUCHO MARX
I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member
GROUCHO MARX
Did I ever tell you how I shot a wild elephant in my pyjamas? How he got into my pyjamas I'll never ...
GROUCHO MARX