Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light on, not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him.

Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad.

They call it "fell asleep" but it should be more like "entered a mental state of regeneration."

Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer.

It's almost bed time, so I'll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Buy our alarm clock and you will sleep soundly.