Joan Rivers
Related JOAN RIVERS Are you taking us to the beach?" - Dan Cahill JUDE WATSON It looks ancient," - Amy Cahill JUDE WATSON It SMELLS ancient," - Dan Cahill JUDE WATSON Palm trees were fanned by a warm, light breeze, and they rolled down their windows to smell the sea. JUDE WATSON BILLY CONNOLLY CAMERON DIAZ I can tell you that you will have your hearts broken more by the people you love than by the people ... MARGARET PETERSON HADDIX I want to live in my truth. Tell me you don't like me, and I know it. But when you don't tel... LEE DANIELS JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER NICOLE SCHERZINGER CHUCK PALAHNIUK PAT CONROY DEBBIE FORD MARINA ABRAMOVIC B. C. FORBES Why don't women have respect for themselves nowadays? What happen to the woman who learned her g... BRANDON T. JACKSON JASON MORAN BARTON GELLMAN No person is perfect. I haven't, thank God, had any infidelity issues. But you can't say wha... TASHA SMITH Men don't have to tiptoe around me - you can say anything and I won't get offended. MICHAEL MICHELE RON WHITE When I was younger, coming up in this industry, I was 17, 18 years old. You couldn't tell me Bey... LIL MAMA PATTI SMITH GWEN IFILL If you don't respect me you're not gonna get that respect back. DAVID HASSELHOFF Sometimes people will come up in the street and say: 'My daughter loves you, will you sign an au... ZARA PHILLIPS People always used to say to me, 'Don't you want your own show? That'd be so cool if you... CANDY CROWLEY I'm old, I'm used to crummy service, I'm trained to get crummy service. To me, the fact ... MARK V. HURD JOHN MAYER MIKE BIRBIGLIA BUDDY HOLLY BRITTANY SNOW OLLY MURS ABRAHAM A. RIBICOFF The people at my label are always endorsing what I say. They say, 'You see the truth, so speak i... ESTELLE BINDI IRWIN CALVIN COOLIDGE It's funny to be discovered by a lot of people who didn't know you before. People always use... TERRY O'QUINN TWYLA THARP NICKI MINAJ DAVID OGILVY TYLER PERRY STEVE JOBS DARLENE LOVE JIMMY KIMMEL MIKE YACONELLI It is just a crazy life as a sportsman. My daughter, Sam, wants to go into tennis, and I tell her, &... ERNIE ELS NENE LEAKES BRENE BROWN If you create something, you don't want someone else to go and profit from it; you have your rig... KIM DOTCOM I know that if I'd had to go and take an exam for acting, I wouldn't have got anywhere. You ... EDITH EVANS FRANK ROBINSON EVA LONGORIA TUPAC SHAKUR RYAN REYNOLDS MACKLEMORE I don't sleep much. It takes me a long time to fall asleep. I'm a bit of an insomniac but, w... ENRIQUE IGLESIAS TAMMY FAYE BAKKER SHAKIRA REBA MCENTIRE GARY COLEMAN I don't get controversial, I don't get political and I don't tell you what to do with yo... GABRIEL IGLESIAS W. C. FIELDS VIDYA BALAN It's the best feeling when you wake up and it's warm and cozy, and you don't have to go ... EMMY ROSSUM KAREN BLACK Your kids can say some cruel things to you at times. For example, Nicole, Miles and Sofie are standi... LIONEL RICHIE I don't feel like I need to tell any lies. You get to an age where you get tired of hiding behin... BETTY WRIGHT Let's head out to the ruins." - Dan Cahill ROLAND SMITH You can't be a real man if you don't look out for your kids. They need you. BILL O'REILLY You can't be a real man if you don't look out for your kids. They need you. BILL O'REILLY CARINE ROITFELD Hopefully the new breed of kids won't have to go through that hard lesson - my kids, my grandkid... LAWRENCE TAYLOR I'm as loyal as anyone and will do anything for people I respect. But if you don't give that... ERIC WEDDLE My thing is, I know kids cuss, they do their thing, but I tell my kids, 'Don't do it in ears... ICE CUBE IYANLA VANZANT If you don't have an emotional connection to why you are trying to accomplish your goals, the od... BRETT HOEBEL MICHAEL PHELPS PRINCE Kids will keep it real. If I've ever had in my life a great anchor, it's them. They get in y... LIONEL RICHIE If the house is on fire, and the fireman shows up, you don't question his color or credentials. ... BERT LANCE HARRIET TUBMAN IAN MCSHANE I love the fact that little kids think I'm a witch. A mum might come over and say 'I'm s... NATALIA TENA BRUNO MARS SALLY FIELD About f-f-ace!" she said to the horse, flailing with her boots. "Into the barn, please. It's time fo... PETER LERANGIS RICK RIORDAN I take risks, but I don't lose respect for my real self. Because what's going to happen afte... ISABELLE ADJANI TERRY PRATCHETT We have to make machines understand what they're doing, or they won't be able to come back a... NICHOLAS NEGROPONTE If you are an investor, I hope that you will stay with me for three, four, ten years. But if you ask... BRUNELLO CUCINELLI NORMAN LEAR CHUCK SCHUMER Lawyers don't serve everyone... Lawyers right now can say, 'I'm not the person to help y... BILL HASLAM I realised that if you get yourself labeled as the funny one, people don't look any further. I&#... CATHERINE TATE When you're a guest star on a movie or a TV show, I always say it's like being invited to a ... ATO ESSANDOH SALLY RIDE ANDREW YOUNG
More Joan Rivers
JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS JOAN RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO I have made that one of my policies never to play anything that I've already put on record. SAM RIVERS Well I'm a third-generation musician. My Grandfather's a musician and my father and mother w... SAM RIVERS The great musicians are those who can reach people, who can make people feel something. SAM RIVERS The first thing you do when you get out to center field is put up your finger and check the wind chi... MICKEY RIVERS I guess I've always liked the idea of being an artist. LARRY RIVERS I spent seven months in Africa and came back saying there isn't anything you can say about black... LARRY RIVERS Any art communicates what you're in the mood to receive. LARRY RIVERS I believe that any art communicates what you're in the mood to receive. LARRY RIVERS We'll do all right if we can capitalize on our mistakes. MICKEY RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO FRANCINE RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO We'll do all right if we can capitalize on our mistakes. MICKEY RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO The web site and the Internet are a whole new ball game. JOHNNY RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO FRANCINE RIVERS I felt alone out there, like I was on a desert island. I felt like Gilligan. MICKEY RIVERS Me and George and Billy are two of a kind.
(on his relationship with George Steinbrenner and Billy M... MICKEY RIVERS These guys are so old they're eligible for meals on wheels. MICKEY RIVERS I don't think you're going to draw much from this game at all, it was not a beautiful game in any wa... DOC RIVERS I've got a Fender Concert amp from the '60s, the one Joe Osborn used. He played his bass thr... JOHNNY RIVERS The first amp I had back in the '50s was a small Fender. JOHNNY RIVERS In early '57, I bought a Fender Telecaster. JOHNNY RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO I think it's gradually gotten less awkward, from my freshman year until now. It's not really as awkw... PHILIP RIVERS I say that confidently. I'm not by any means going to play the perfect game, but I feel like I can g... PHILIP RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO I don't get upset over things I can control, because if I can control them there's no sense in getti... MICKEY RIVERS No wonder you're all mixed up. You got a white man's first name, a Spanish man's second name and a b... MICKEY RIVERS If you can stop him, you got a better chance, ... If you do that, the Angels aren't as hard to beat. MICKEY RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO I really don't trust Benson. He's got the sweetest deal in the NFL (the Saints are the only NFL team... ALLEN RIVERS This whole state is hurting right now. I know times are hard. I understand people are angry with Ben... ALLEN RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO He's so ugly. When you walked by him, your pants wrinkle. He made fly balls curve foul. MICKEY RIVERS My goals are to hit .300, score 100 runs, and stay injury-prone. MICKEY RIVERS I'm going to double my limit. MICKEY RIVERS Pitching is 80% of the game and the other half is hitting and fielding. MICKEY RIVERS When you're outside in this beautiful natural environment, it's dissonant to see some special effect... BARRY RIVERS The dirty little secret about film festivals is that every year you reinvent the wheel. BARRY RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS When we started doing the college tours, the show was seen in a new light. It's really dealing with ... BEN RIVERS We're reading some of the books about the Titanic. We're going to see the exhibit at the museum in a... BEN RIVERS The less than polar conditions actually drew more people. BEN RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS Sideways rain. We threw it 59 times (actually 57). PHILIP RIVERS Paul was absolutely sensational tonight. I didn't realize they had 50 and 43. I knew they had a lot.... DOC RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO FRANCINE RIVERS I don't know if it was vital [to get the win], but it was big. We needed the win because I look at t... DOC RIVERS The interviews have been a little tough due to the fact that we're interviewing dogs. We see a l... MELISSA RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO RIVERS CUOMO Once he gets in and just plays natural, be himself, he's going to do great. I like this guy. He's no... MICKEY RIVERS I like watching because that's my style of play, ... When he does what he does, I enjoy it. MICKEY RIVERS What was the name of that dog on 'Rin Tin Tin'? MICKEY RIVERS What I really remember is that people camped out everywhere, and the fact everybody expected it migh... JOHNNY RIVERS FRANCINE RIVERS Our boys mean a lot to us. We've been hooked for some time. ALLEN RIVERS RIVERS CUOMO The message that is coming across from the media is clearly, 'Watch out, women, if you're ambitious.... CARYL RIVERS I'm not sitting here all fired up like I've achieved something, ... I'm pleased that I've made some ... PHILIP RIVERS I'm sure there will be a different report every day for the next six months, and I'm not going to ge... PHILIP RIVERS
Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my... 
Don't tell me how to do my job. I don't come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up. 
My dad always used to tell me that if they challenge you to an after-school fight, tell them you won... 
Kids are a great analogy. You want your kids to grow up, and you don't want your kids to grow up... 
You cry and you scream and you stomp your feet and you shout. You say, 'You know what? I'm g... 
When I first used to tour, guys would come up and say, 'Where's the fight club in my area?&#... 
I told my kids when they were little, 'Look, kids, your mother and I are screwing you up somehow... 
Don't go to sleep now, for you have been awakened. Don't shut your eyes, or you will put out... 
I had a very difficult relationship with my mother. She used to wake me up in the middle of the nigh... 
Turn resolutely to work, to recreation, or in any case to physical exercise till you are so tired yo... 
Pianos - if they don't like what you're saying, then they won't talk back to you. And yo... 
Privacy is relational. It depends on the audience. You don't want your employer to know you'... 
Don't bring your kids to my show, and I won't come to your house and cuss. 
I don't believe any artist who says, 'I had to do that because DJs will tell me I can't ... 
You would like me to say that the veil will be ripped from the voters' eyes sometime between now... 
My fear is that I go up to the girl of my dreams and say 'I'm sorry, but I've got to say... 
Growing up, I was discouraged from telling personal stories. My dad often used the phrase 'Don&#... 
If anyone asks you what kind of music you play, tell him 'pop.' Don't tell him 'rock... 
I'm a huge believer in you don't really need anybody to make you feel validated or make you ... 
I like girls who want to get up and dance and don't mind singing in front of my family - you kno... 
You should not do an autobiography if you want to tell the truth. There are a lot of things I know a... 
If you said 'Boo' to me, I wouldn't sleep for two weeks! I don't like scary movies. 
If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it. 
People often say to me, 'I don't know anything about dance.' I say, 'Stop. You got u... 
Sometimes I want to just pull the off switch, but you can't because if you go outside, you have ... 
Never write an advertisement which you wouldn't want your family to read. You wouldn't tell ... 
Did you know you can't say 'Jesus' in a sitcom? They told me that, and I was like, You g... 
It's hard to tell with these Internet startups if they're really interested in building comp... 
I get such joy out of performing for people, and you can tell whether they like you or they don'... 
When I was on the radio, I used to be able to go a lot farther than I can now. You don't really ... 
Pretending is the grease of non-relationships. Pretending is how you and I get through the day witho... 
Let me get you to understand I don't bully anybody. I stand up for what I believe in and I'm... 
Anonymous comments? You're not in the arena, man. If you can't say it to me in person in fro... 
Pitchers did me a favor when they knocked me down. It made me more determined. I wouldn't let th... 
I don't regret anything I ever do or say. I don't like to live my life being censored. I lik... 
My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find ... 
I see guys with, like, eyebrow art, and I wanna tell them, 'You don't have to go too crazy o... 
I don't want to look back and be like, 'You had it all, and you weren't even present for... 
When you - when someone dies in your family and you think you're over it, and then you wake up i... 
My team and I have reunited two elements that coexist with difficulty: respect and affection, becaus... 
I just try not to judge. Don't judge me, and I won't judge you. 
I don't have any friends and don't have any intention of making any. People will stab you in... 
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times... 
Weight used to be an issue. I was always fat as a child. And everyone used to tell me, 'You'... 
If you didn't know that I am an actress, I don't think you could tell from my lifestyle. I c... 
I've always used black girls on the runway, because I think they're beautiful. I don't n... 
I had to stop traveling alone because I missed so many planes. When somebody runs up to you in the a... 
People say to me, 'You're so lucky. You get to see the world.' But I don't. I go to ... 
I don't see why I should give my new music to iTunes or anyone else. They won't pay me an ad... 
Twasn't me, 'twas the Lord! I always told Him, 'I trust to you. I don't know where t... 
My daughter said, 'I don't think granddad really suits you.' 
I've had big record label presidents look me in the face and say, 'Your music sucks, you don... 
I haven't had an orthodox career, and I've wanted more than anything to have your respect. T... 
You see?" Damien leaned over his desk and spread out half a dozen charcoal sketches. "These are only... 
Siren voices tell me, 'You don't have to keep going on.' And then you think, 'I'... 
We got ratings. It isn't that they won't quarrel with you, or say you're always right. B... 
There are two tests in life, more important than any other test. On Monday morning, when you wake up... 
It's easy to sleep floating around - it's very comfortable. But you have to be careful that ... 
When people ask where I studied to be an ambassador, I say my neighborhood and my school. I've t... 
My mother loved entertaining, and I've followed suit, so we have big celebrations for New Year, ... 
I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking. 
I really want to disappear, grow a beard, not talk to anyone, not make any friends... I just want to... 
My favorite book is 'Redeeming Love.' It was my first as a born-again Christian, my statemen... 
Stand firm in the Lord. Stand firm and let Him fight your battle. Do not try to fight alone. 
Unless we have something worth dying for, Atretes, we've nothing worth living for. 
I think if I wasn't a musician, I would be a high-school band director or orchestra director. I ... 
I have some good books of Bach keyboard music transcribed for guitar, and there's always a nylon...