Don't ask for a girl's hand in marriage and forget to ask for her leg too.

Be calm on your wedding day; she won’t kill you in front of a hundred people, no matter what you've done.

If God had a wife, He would be in trouble too if He dodged His chores.

If men could be bought like clothes at an outlet, only then would women always get what they bargained for.

Diamonds are a girl's best friend until love introduces her to her soulmate.

The easiest way to remember your future wife’s birthday is to marry her on Super Bowl Sunday.