Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had hard luck while he was alive. I wish they were used more.

The report of my death was an exaggeration After reading his own obituary, June 2 1897

When ill luck begins, it does not come in sprinkles, but in showers.

I am glad the old masters are all dead, and I only wish they had died sooner.

Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.

It is hard enough luck being a monarch, without being a target also