Everyone has three lives: a public life, a private life, and a secret life.

HOW TO START EACH DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK. 1. Open a new file in your computer.2. Name it 'Barack Obama'.3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.4. Empty the Recycle Bin.5. Your PC will ask you: 'Do you really want to get rid of 'Barack Obama?'6. Firmly Click 'Yes.'7. Feel better?

“Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes, you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you’ll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding, but there’s also that chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime the one person who knows you sometimes better than you know yourself is the same person who’s been standing beside you all along.”

Back off before I test your Airbag.!!!

‘Personal Responsibility??? Never heard of it!!’

Warning!!! Very important, please read!!! Vodka and ice will ruin your kidneys. Rum and ice will ruin your liver. Whisky and ice will ruin your heart. Gin and ice will ruin your brain. Coke and ice will ruin your teeth. That bloody ice is lethal!!! Warn all your friends: Lay off the ice!!