Everything my mother made had to cook for 80 hours, and when she made matzoh balls she didn't know fluffy. Everything sank.

Cook until they're popped but not yet big and fluffy.

My mother kept the house clean and we ate good. I didn't know we were poor until I started giving interviews.

I learned to cook in self-defense. My wife doesn't know what a kitchen is. In the first month of our marriage, she broiled lamb chops 26 nights in a row. Then I took over. I used to mind her not caring about food, but no more - as long as I can eat what I want.

My wife can't cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.

I was my mother's favorite, and she'd help me with everything.