Don’t pinch that guy’s ass. He’s a leprechaun.
KATHY BRYSON It was never just about the money.
KATHY BRYSON She caught you. Therefore she gets your treasure.
KATHY BRYSON Are you trying to seduce me or trick me?
KATHY BRYSON No one ever said you can’t have world dominance and a little romance too.
KATHY BRYSON You didn’t make her sue you, even if you did punch her at that wedding.
KATHY BRYSON A leprechaun did not just kill off my car in a hailstorm.
KATHY BRYSON Grabbing someone’s ass doesn’t count as capturing them!
KATHY BRYSON Oh, you’re hardly one to talk. Look where ogling a man got you.
KATHY BRYSON Nothing good can come from a crack of dawn meeting on a Monday morning.
KATHY BRYSON - FIGHTING MAD I grew up with my little brother, and we were raised by my grandmother. I was an insider for real. I...
BRYSON TILLER I had always thought that once you grew up you could do anything you wanted - stay up all night or e...
BILL BRYSON People in the West like to shoot things. When they first got to the West they shot buffalo. Once the...
BILL BRYSON I can't wait to see someone else from Louisville make a hit song 'cos that'd be dope. I ...
BRYSON TILLER I used to bottle up all of my emotions and never say anything. Even if something really made me mad,...
BRYSON TILLER Energy is liberated matter, matter is energy waiting to happen.
BILL BRYSON You may not feel outstandingly robust, but if you are an average-sized adult you will contain within...
BILL BRYSON The real significance of Magellan's voyage was not that it was the first to circumnavigate the plane...
BILL BRYSON What on earth would I do if four bears came into my camp? Why, I would die of course. Literally shit...
BILL BRYSON America's industrial success produced a roll call of financial magnificence: Rockefellers, Morgans, ...
BILL BRYSON Clearly, some time ago makers and consumers of American junk food passed jointly through some kind o...
BILL BRYSON There are things you just can't do in life. You can't beat the phone company, you can't make a waite...
BILL BRYSON Philosophers are capable of almost endless enjoyment of mutual misunderstanding.
LYMAN BRYSON There is the odd exception, like Albert Einstein, but as a breed, scientists tend not be very good a...
BILL BRYSON I still enjoy traveling a lot. I mean, it amazes me that I still get excited in hotel rooms just to ...
BILL BRYSON I like anime, but one of my favorite animes, and one of the most popular animes out there - Dragon B...
BRYSON TILLER To me, the greatest invention of my lifetime is the laptop computer and the fact that I can be worki...
BILL BRYSON You would think, because I stayed to myself and I was shy, that I'd be a good student, but actua...
BRYSON TILLER Music should probably provide answers in terms of lyrical content, and giving people a sense of toge...
PEABO BRYSON There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old ag...
BILL BRYSON If you drive to, say, Shenandoah National Park, or the Great Smoky Mountains, you'll get some ap...
BILL BRYSON Much as I resented having to grow up in Des Moines, it gave me a real appreciation for every place i...
BILL BRYSON I'm not a natural story-teller. Put a keyboard in front of me and I'm fine, but stand me up ...
BILL BRYSON What an odd thing tourism is. You fly off to a strange land, eagerly abandoning all the comforts of ...
BILL BRYSON Among the many thousands of things that I have never been able to understand, one in particular stan...
BILL BRYSON Up to a third of bundling couples found themselves presented with a permanent souvenir of the occasi...
BILL BRYSON The whole of the global economy is based on supplying the cravings of two per cent of the world's po...
BILL BRYSON He had the sort of face that makes you realize God does have a sense of humor.
BILL BRYSON More than 300 million people in the world speak English and the rest, it sometimes seems, try to.
BILL BRYSON For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless, and ...
BILL BRYSON Incidentally, disturbance from cosmic background radiation is something we have all experienced. Tun...
BILL BRYSON I had always thought that once you grew up you could do anything you wanted -- stay up all night or ...
BILL BRYSON The biggest attraction in Britain is Britain - the whole package. Our heritage is not just a collect...
BILL BRYSON I can wear a baseball cap; I am entitled to wear a baseball cap. I am genetically pre-disposed to we...
BILL BRYSON The whole of the global economy is based on supplying the cravings of two per cent of the world'...
BILL BRYSON Boston's freeway system is insane. It was clearly designed by a person who had spent his childho...
BILL BRYSON For a long time, I'd been vaguely fascinated by the idea that Charles Lindbergh flew the Atlanti...
BILL BRYSON I've been writing all these books that have been largely autobiographical and yet, really, they ...
BILL BRYSON Roads get wider and busier and less friendly to pedestrians. And all of the development based around...
BILL BRYSON I read an article in 'Forbes' entitled 'Six Ways To Achieve Any Goal,' and it really...
BRYSON TILLER If you go out on the Appalachian Trail, you have to bring so much more equipment - a tent, sleeping ...
BILL BRYSON You don't have to know anything about baseball to respond to Babe Ruth because he's just thi...
BILL BRYSON We forget just how painfully dim the world was before electricity. A candle, a good candle, provides...
BILL BRYSON England was full of words I'd never heard before - streaky bacon, short back and sides, Belisha ...
BILL BRYSON I grew up, really, in the days before air conditioning. So I can remember what it was like to be rea...
BILL BRYSON Have you ever seen Glenn Beck in operation? It is the most terrifying thing. It's so bad that yo...
BILL BRYSON I'm not funny in person. I mean I'm really not. I'm one of those people who always screw...
BILL BRYSON Yes, U.S. travelers dress better. The British are always so conspicuous in hot climates. They don...
BILL BRYSON There'd never been a more advantageous time to be a criminal in America than during the 13 years...
BILL BRYSON Distance changes utterly when you take the world on foot. A mile becomes a long way, two miles liter...
BILL BRYSON It wasn't until 9th grade that I got into music. This guy in school heard me singing around the ...
BRYSON TILLER The world at night, for much of history, was a very dark place indeed.
BILL BRYSON Open your refrigerator door, and you summon forth more light than the total amount enjoyed by most h...
BILL BRYSON I'm only as good as my team.
BRYSON SUMLIN If it wasn't for all the people around you and in your life, you couldn't do anything, ... You can't...
BRYSON SUMLIN I'd rather my teammates do the talking, ... I was taught to let my actions do the talking.
BRYSON SUMLIN We were well-prepared for this game, all across the board, ... I don't think we've reached our poten...
BRYSON SUMLIN We just have to work even harder, that's all, ... Never settle.
BRYSON SUMLIN I was taught at an early age to be humble, ... All my family taught me that. You can't forget where ...
BRYSON SUMLIN I have to see where the defense and my linemen are, ... I have to set them up in the right place to ...
BRYSON SUMLIN There's a lot of little things I need to work on, ... I have to do a better job showing run fake. Bu...
BRYSON SUMLIN Point A to Point Z.
BRYSON SUMLIN Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a guy coming, ... I cut left to bring the guy to my block.
BRYSON SUMLIN The second home run I thought it was a pop-up. I guess the wind gave me a little help.
BRYSON BENDALL It was a good pitch at the knee caps and I got in front and attacked it. I didn't know what a home r...
BRYSON BENDALL We knew we could hit him. We just had to get out in front and sit on that first pitch fastball.
BRYSON BENDALL The second home run — I thought it was a pop-up. I guess the wind g...
BRYSON BENDALL It was a good pitch at the knee caps and I got in front and attacked it. I didn't know what a home r...
BRYSON BENDALL An awful lot of England is slowly eroding, in ways that I find really distressing, and an awful lot ...
BILL BRYSON The world is very lucky to have America. It's got to be the first time in the whole history of t...
BILL BRYSON The rooms were small and airless and cramped. To make matters worse, somebody in our group was makin...
BILL BRYSON Nothing, however, bemused the Indians more than the European habit of blowing their noses into a fin...
BILL BRYSON I often feel I'm a disappointment to people because they expect me to be the guy in the books. W...
BILL BRYSON Where I grew up, in Des Moines, Iowa, there is hardly any downtown economic activity now. Everybody ...
BILL BRYSON Des Moines is like your typical American city; it's just these concentric circles of malls, buil...
BILL BRYSON I grew up in Des Moines. My dad had a house full of books, things like P.G. Wodehouse books and '...
BILL BRYSON I come from Des Moines. Someone had to.
BILL BRYSON If this book has a lesson, it is that we are awfully lucky to be here-and by 'we' I mean every livin...
BILL BRYSON The intimate, even incestuous Circle in the Square where the audience was close enough to be patrons...
JOHN BRYSON I was working at Papa John's full-time. I had just quit my part-time job at UPS. I was there for...
BRYSON TILLER I'm a great believer that you had to do everything you've done to have got to where you are.
BILL BRYSON The whole of the global economy is based on supplying the cravings of teo per cent of the world's po...
BILL BRYSON I read an article in Forbes entitled 'Six Ways To Achieve Any Goal,' and it really inspired ...
BRYSON TILLER Sometimes my life is moving so fast that I forget what's going on. I'm just going with the p...
BRYSON TILLER In a funny way, nothing makes you feel more like a native of your own country than to live where nea...
BILL BRYSON The insurance payments are going to go away. The outlook remains very bleak.
JAY BRYSON I come from Des Moines. Somebody had to.
BILL BRYSON The remarkable position in which we find ourselves is that we don't actually know what we actually k...
BILL BRYSON In any area of human endeavour, there is going to be mediocrity. You're going to find people who...
BILL BRYSON I could give you a long list of things I like about Britain, but essentially what it comes down to i...
BILL BRYSON I have long known that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the m...
BILL BRYSON In the countryside, litter doesn't have a friend. It doesn't have anybody who's saying, ...
BILL BRYSON I see litter as part of a long continuum of anti-social behaviour.
BILL BRYSON Cavendish is a book in himself. Born into a life of sumptuous privilege- his grandfathers were dukes...
BILL BRYSON The romance of travel wasn't always terribly evident to those who were actually experiencing it.
BILL BRYSON I just started mimicking what I heard and singing along to it.
BRYSON TILLER Maine is wonderful. It can be very hard. I mean, if you look at the profile maps it doesn't look...
BILL BRYSON America is a great disappointment to me. As I said in one of my books, other societies create civili...
BILL BRYSON Everybody always thinks you have to move out of the city and go where the music industry is, but it&...
BRYSON TILLER Whenever you fly into Louisville, you see a sign that says, 'It's Possible Here.' I reme...
BRYSON TILLER I'm from Louisville, Kentucky, and nobody gets out of there. So I'm like, how am I gonna get...
BRYSON TILLER Tune your television to any channel it doesn't receive and about 1 percent of the dancing static you...
BILL BRYSON I tell the kids that, even in a childhood marked by despair and deprivation, I knew that no matter w...
BILL BRYSON I would make a genuinely terrible guide. I can't remember things. I would get half way through t...
BILL BRYSON Physics is really nothing more than a search for ultimate simplicity, but so far all we have is a ki...
BILL BRYSON I always laugh when I listen to my old stuff. I was just trying way too much back then. Doing too ma...
BRYSON TILLER Those lanes will be constructed during the 2006 construction season. Traffic will remain on the exis...
CRAIG BRYSON Three hundred types of mussel, a third of the world’s total, live in the Smokies. Smokies mussels ...
BILL BRYSON I grew up with my little brother, and we were raised by my grandmother. I was an insider for real. I...
BRYSON TILLER I have made a career of bumbling around places, stumbling on landmarks and generally being quite hap...
BILL BRYSON Language, never forget, is more fashion than science, and matters of usage, spelling and pronunciati...
BILL BRYSON In my day the principal concerns of university students were sex, smoking dope, rioting and learning...
BILL BRYSON No one knows, incidentally, why Australia's spiders are so extravagantly toxic; capturing small inse...
BILL BRYSON In 1927, if you were stuck with idle time, reading is what you did. It's no accident that the &#...
BILL BRYSON I have long known that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most ...
BILL BRYSON I am taking this very seriously and I am honored to be appointed. It's not every day that an immigra...
BILL BRYSON Nothing gives the English more pleasure, in a quiet but determined sort of way, than to do things od...
BILL BRYSON Most scientists are without exception adorably quirky, and one of the ways of making it more accessi...
BILL BRYSON When you tell an Iowan a joke, you can see a kind of race going on between his brain and his express...
BILL BRYSON I don't plan to write another science book, but I don't plan not to. I do enjoy writing histories, a...
BILL BRYSON the party animal of the atomic world?
BILL BRYSON A bank robber in Los Angeles told the clerk not to give him cash, but to deposit the money in his ch...
BILL BRYSON And I find chopsticks frankly distressing. Am I alone in thinking it odd that a people ingenious eno...
BILL BRYSON In three minutes, 98 percent of all the matter there is or will ever be has been produced. We have a...
BILL BRYSON My first rule of travel is never to go to a place that sounds like a medical condition and Critz is ...
BILL BRYSON Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing...
BILL BRYSON It will help more evenly distribute the east-west traffic in that area.
CRAIG BRYSON English grammar is so complex and confusing for the one very simple reason that its rules and termin...
BILL BRYSON The lower cost of Chinese goods means we can spend more on other goods and services.
JAY BRYSON Coming back to your native land after an absence of many years is a surprisingly unsettling business...
BILL BRYSON One of the brilliant things about Britain is the way you've managed to save old things but to ke...
BILL BRYSON She was torn between her customer service training and her youthful certitude.
BILL BRYSON The good thing about our schedule, you don't want to say the 'classics' don't matter, but we can sti...
BRYSON ROSSER It is easy to overlook this thought that life just is. As humans we are inclined to feel that life m...
BILL BRYSON As we parted at the Natural History Museum in London, I asked Richard Fortey how science ensures tha...
BILL BRYSON This has been a long time coming for us. We first conceived of the project about 10 years ago, and t...
CRAIG BRYSON Music is an important factor to a healthy way of living.
MAURICE BRYSON Surround yourself with people who value your friendship, rather than those who posed the opposite.
MAURICE BRYSON Don't be pigheaded over your successes, but rather educate and inspire others to follow in your foot...
MAURICE BRYSON Love is magical, adorable, and challenging. To get the best out of it, you have to live it, feel it,...
MAURICE BRYSON In general, a rising rate environment slows down growth, so most companies are not going to go as go...
JAY BRYSON He's going to greet some freshman the same way.
MATT BRYSON When you grow up in middle America you are inculcated from the earliest age with the belief - no, th...
BILL BRYSON Unfortunately, the underlying details [of this report] suggest that it would be premature to break o...
JAY BRYSON We are so used to the notion of our own inevitability as life's dominant species that it is hard to ...
BILL BRYSON To my mind, the only possible pet is a cow. Cows love you. . . . They will listen to your problems a...
BILL BRYSON My first rule of consumerism is never to buy anything you can't make your children carry.
BILL BRYSON SCE has borrowed billions of dollars, which threatens the company's solvency, through eight and a ha...
JOHN BRYSON Life is a beautiful gift that is bestowed upon us, go on out and live it. Believe in yourself, let y...
MAURICE BRYSON The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error o...
LYMAN BRYSON Personally, I've never been attracted to danger. It's not my sort of thing. I am more attrac...
BILL BRYSON In France, a chemist named Pilatre de Rozier tested the flammability of hydrogen by gulping a mouthf...
BILL BRYSON If you imagine the 4,500-bilion-odd years of Earth's history compressed into a normal earthly day, t...
BILL BRYSON It is a slightly arresting notion that if you were to pick yourself apart with tweezers, one atom at...
BILL BRYSON There are three stages in scientific discovery. First, people deny that it is true, then they deny t...
BILL BRYSON Because they are so long-lived, atoms really get around. Every atom you possess has almost certainly...
BILL BRYSON Protons give an atom its identity, electrons its personality.
BILL BRYSON One of my first purchases after I signed to RCA was a BMW. I was driving on the highway, and I heard...
BRYSON TILLER Britain still has the most reliably beautiful countryside of anywhere in the world. I would hate to ...
BILL BRYSON As my father always used to tell me, 'You see, son, there's always someone in the world worse off th...
BILL BRYSON I just want to make $100 million and retire.
BRYSON TILLER The average Southerner has the speech patterns of someone slipping in and out of consciousness. I ca...
BILL BRYSON I once joked in a book that there are three things you can't do in life. You can't beat the ...
BILL BRYSON Scientists tend to be unappreciated in the world at large, but you can hardly overstate the importan...
BILL BRYSON I just use my life story as a kind of device on which to hang comic observations. It's not my in...
BILL BRYSON It's going to be inconvenient, you have the eastern part of the city from here. With these hotels, y...
JIM BRYSON Gold's been strong and we've seen more stories about foreign direct investments. We should look towa...
JIM BRYSON I want things to be better all the time. And I tend to get angry about that. Books are an opportunit...
BILL BRYSON I once joked in a book that there are three things you can't do in life. You can't beat the ...
BILL BRYSON But that's the glory of foreign travel, as far as I am concerned. I don't want to know what people a...
BILL BRYSON Nobody gets excited about the future at all, ever. The future is something we find depressing and wo...
BILL BRYSON Maybe I was just born with a little bit of vocals or natural talent, but I feel like I taught myself...
BRYSON TILLER A third...candidate for Shakespearean authorship was Christopher Marlowe. He was the right age (just...
BILL BRYSON A Walk in the Woods
BILL BRYSON You can always tell a Midwestern couple in Europe because they will be standing in the middle of a b...
BILL BRYSON Maybe I was just born with a little bit of vocals or natural talent, but I feel like I taught myself...
BRYSON TILLER It's pretty rough to deal with. But I've still got to be a leader, a motivator. I'm still coming to ...
BRYSON ROSSER Those guys are capable, but they're both learning, and it's their first year, and it's going to take...
BRYSON ROSSER And to move forward and to build on it (better communications) I think would be in the best interest...
BRYSON PONCE It was for the first time really that the chief acknowledged we weren't making these things up. The ...
BRYSON PONCE Chief, if you are committed to doing that, like you said you are, along with your staff, we will do ...
BRYSON PONCE We dug ourselves a hole. But we're not gonna stop. We'll come back fighting next year.
BRYSON KRUEGER It was kind of a morale booster. It reassured us that we can play with anybody in the league.
BRYSON KRUEGER They definitely took us out of some of the stuff we try to run. We just didn't come out ready to pla...
BRYSON KRUEGER They took the fight to us. There wasn't much we could do.
BRYSON KRUEGER The second home run — I thought it was a pop-up. I guess the wind gave me a little help.
BRYSON BENDALL It was a good pitch at the knee caps and I got in front and attacked it. I didn't know what a home r...
BRYSON BENDALL I would rather have bowel surgery in the woods with a stick. If you are not stung or pronged to deat...
BILL BRYSON [Australia] is the home of the largest living thing on earth, the Great Barrier Reef, and of the lar...
BILL BRYSON The people are immensely likable— cheerful, extrovert, quick-witted, and unfailingly obliging. The...
BILL BRYSON