FastSaying

Feature-length film comedy is harder to pull off than the episodic sitcom - it doesn't have the same factory machinery up and running, teams of writers putting familiar characters through permutations - but that doesn't explain the widening quality gap that makes movie humor look like a genetic defective.


James Wolcott

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AUNJANUE ELLIS Darwinism doesn't explain where gravity comes from. It doesn't explain where thermodynamics ...
BEN STEIN A picture story just doesn't run like a film. It doesn't have 24 frames per second. It doesn...
BEN KATCHOR We all die, it's a fact that today you aren't here, yesterday you weren't here doesn't mean that tom...
DEYTH BANGER A lot of movies are made, but because they come to film festivals and your movie doesn't get bou...
MICHAEL ANGARANO It ends or it doesn't.
That’s what you say. That’s
how you get through it.
The tu...
CAITLYN SIEHL I need to go someplace faraway that doesn't have telephones and doesn't have a record player...
WILL OLDHAM I don't know if you guys have ever kissed anybody in real life, but it doesn't always go as ...
JORDAN GAVARIS When the 'Guardian' is commissioning writers to write obituary pieces about you and your car...
JAMES CORDEN I'm interested not just in projects that I'll be starring in, but producing film and TV that...
LANCE REDDICK When you're doing a single-camera show, it's more buying into a level of reality. I think a ...
DARREN STAR The Bush administration doesn't particularly like public participation. It makes them look bad.
TED HUGHES When I make an American movie it's going to come out all over the world-it doesn't happen th...
MONICA BELLUCCI One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you.
LARRY GELBART In the same way that so many people read 'Harry Potter' and went to see 'Harry Potter,&#...
CASSANDRA CLARE This is another major feature of thought: Thought doesn't know it is doing something and then it...
DAVID BOHM The thing that makes 'Dirty Jobs' different is that it's one of the few shows that portr...
MIKE ROWE As a jobbing actor, I never get a script and go 'I can't be bothered with this.' Life do...
EVE MYLES Comedy doesn't really matter that much; I know that. I treat it like an adult - I don't trea...
BO BURNHAM People want to classify and say, 'OK, this is a gangster film.' 'This is a Western.'...
MARTIN SCORSESE A good horror movie - it doesn't matter how many comedy horror films there have been before. Doe...
FEDE ALVAREZ The men have piled up in my past, have fallen trenchantly through my life, like an avalanche that do...
ELIZABETH WURTZEL Real comedy doesn't just make people laugh and think, but makes them laugh and change.
SAM KINISON And the president is all wrong when he maintains that a nominee should have an up-or-down vote. The ...
ROBERT BYRD What I look for these days is that I don't have long speeches, the characters gets to sit down a...
ALAN ARKIN I think I'm prouder of 'The Victim' than anything else, just because, if nothing else, i...
MICHAEL BIEHN The truth doesn't change. It was the same when Moses got the Ten Commandments as it is today. Th...
DMX One of my biggest pet peeves is that I just don't like it when characters do things that are fun...
GLENN HOWERTON Taking dishes straight off the restaurant's menu and putting them into a cookbook doesn't wo...
MARCUS SAMUELSSON What makes a river so restful to people is that it doesn't have any doubt - it is sure to get wh...
HAL BOYLE It doesn't use shading, but it does use stroke length variations.
JOHN ROBERT GREGG Gags die, humor doesn't.
JACK BENNY I had a real good thing going for me, and I got sidetracked. It doesn't have to be that way. It ...
KEN CAMINITI Why there is word for "End"???, which mean why there is "End",...!?

(So far it doesn't ex...
DEYTH BANGER I've been in movies where the movie doesn't come together but the role comes together, or th...
NICK NOLTE Only if you were lucky to be born in the right class, the one Donald Trump was born in, then of cour...
RAOUL PECK What I realized is that it doesn't matter how big or small your film is. The actual filmmaking p...
JAMES WAN L. A. is crazy. The women all look the same now. That thing with the cheeks. Like Madonna. Who do th...
SOFIA VERGARA Success doesn't mean that you are healthy, success doesn't mean that you're happy, succe...
VICTORIA PRINCIPAL My favorite movie is 'Die Hard.' It doesn't have pinatas and mariachis. It's just a ...
CRISTELA ALONZO I'm a storyteller: the crux of the matter is to reach beauty, poetry; it doesn't matter if t...
ROBERTO BENIGNI I don't feel the obligation to have a big explosion in the first 20 seconds so the audience does...
TOM SELLECK People are scared to make something that doesn't look like another film that made a lot of money...
BILLY BOYD Getting all dressed up and putting on fancy clothes - all of that's a great thing, but oddly, it...
ANNETTE BENING My main characters are the most sunny, happy, optimistic, loving creatures on the face of the Earth....
BRUCE CAMERON I like all kinds of comedy. I like comedy that doesn't talk about real beliefs or serious though...
MARIA BAMFORD American television constantly tries to co-op British comedy and create their own version of it. Mos...
CHRIS HARDWICK Just because something is on trend doesn't mean you have to embrace it. You can look at it and a...
AERIN LAUDER The improv, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but when it does, it's like open-field...
ROBIN WILLIAMS I can't be told life is beautiful through a normal positive thinking book or a Hallmark movie; t...
JAMES GUNN Just because you haven't got a home, doesn't make you homeless.
and
Just because you don't...
ANTHONY T. HINCKS Basketball is a team game. But that doesn't mean all five players should have the same amount of...
DEAN SMITH Rock and roll doesn't necessarily mean a band. It doesn't mean a singer, and it doesn't ...
MALCOLM MCLAREN The only reason to have a positive mental attitude is that it makes life better. It doesn't cure...
MOLLY IVINS To this day, I've found that it doesn't matter what a guy looks like if he's really funn...
CATHERINE O'HARA I asked someone once why he liked Jean-Michel's work and why it was being singled out for acclai...
RENE RICARD A convert, if he converts through the Orthodox, he has the Jewish gene. If he doesn't convert th...
ELI YISHAI All of the characters in my films, they share one commonality. It doesn't matter whether they ar...
PARK CHAN-WOOK The prosecution has to go with the evidence and the facts and tell the story as it happened. The def...
MARCIA CLARK I am 18 years old, that's for sure, OFFICIALLY... no need to hide anymore my age or to try to fake i...
DEYTH BANGER It doesn't matter what age you are. You can look sexy and feel great, and that doesn't have ...
CAROL ALT I don't deal with the whole 'bad boy who doesn't call you.' That doesn't interes...
MACKENZIE ROSMAN I don't think of the characters as being good or bad because that doesn't help me as a write...
BRYAN COGMAN It doesn't matter if you look different. You're still the same as everybody else because you...
NATALIE DU TOIT A fishnet is made up of a lot more holes than strings, but you can't therefore argue that the ne...
JEFFREY KLUGER I go to movies expecting to have a whole experience. If I want a movie that doesn't end, I'l...
JOSS WHEDON Landing a million-dollar investment for your startup is exhilarating. But as big as that number soun...
RYAN HOLMES I could never be the kind of writer who went to the set of the movie and fussed and fretted about, &...
ALAN MOORE One of the greatest features of science is that it doesn't matter where you were born, and it do...
NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON About 20 percent of the genetic information in your nose doesn't match anything that we've e...
NATHAN WOLFE I don't have a Twitter or a Facebook, but that doesn't mean I'm any more productive than...
NATE RUESS If you add up all the promises any politician makes, the math doesn't work. Hillary Clinton'...
WILBUR ROSS My daughter doesn't even get my humor. She's like, 'Um, no. I don't get it, Dad. Mmm...
KEVIN HART A good novel is something that challenges perception, that allows you to see the world anew through ...
JUSTIN CARTWRIGHT It doesn't matter the kind of music, it doesn't matter whether it's a cowboy hat or a ya...
DAVID LEE ROTH My truth is that what doesn't kill you makes you weaker rather than stronger, although it makes ...
MARIAN KEYES ... You asked how am I?? Really?? So you care about me?? or you just decided to ask to return it bac...
DEYTH BANGER I don't really dissect comedy. Nothing kills off humor more than overanalyzing it.
DAVID STEINBERG When you're in prison, the progress of the outside world doesn't necessarily translate insid...
SAMIRA WILEY Writing about magic is harder than writing about spies because you're dealing with something tha...
ANTHONY HOROWITZ A lot of writers want everything put on screen, but it doesn't work like that. The screenwriter ...
SUSAN HILL Life is full of regrets, but it doesn't pay to look back.
ZINEDINE ZIDANE Once you don't smile on film, they say, 'Let's have that bloke who doesn't smile....
RICHARD C. ARMITAGE When James Bond presses the watch and the car explodes, the writer doesn't go into the science o...
RAVI SUBRAMANIAN It's of very little importance to me that I was born gay. It doesn't make me a better athlet...
JOHNNY WEIR It doesn't really feel like it's got anything to do with me. I mean, I know I wrote it, and ...
PATRICK MARBER Fear has disappeared. No more fear. In Asia, it is different. They've discovered again the fear ...
DARIO ARGENTO It doesn't matter the amount of gore, the amount of shocks that you can have in a movie if the m...
FEDE ALVAREZ Sometimes earning awards doesn't matter as much as earning revenue or profit, or having a good r...
STEPHEN CHOW There is always another way to say the same thing that doesn't look at all like the way you said...
RICHARD P. FEYNMAN I tend to be that swimmer that doesn't look like she is trying, but is actually dying on the ins...
CATE CAMPBELL Everybody knows what a caterpillar is, and it doesn't look anything like a butterfly.
LYNN MARGULIS Joe E. Lewis said, 'Money doesn't buy happiness but it calms the nerves.' And that is ho...
ALEXANDER PAYNE I think the T-Shirt bra is really special for Victoria's Secret because it's that kind of si...
BEHATI PRINSLOO Now there are certain things you have to prepare - like dialect and special skills. But in the momen...
IDRIS ELBA I've done lots of songs for film soundtracks and things like that - stuff I'm not ashamed of...
CHRISSIE HYNDE A 527 doesn't have a wife. It doesn't have a brother-in-law who knows a lot about politics, ...
ROGER STONE The system is that there is no system. That doesn't mean we don't have process. Apple is a v...
STEVE JOBS Chemistry is a hard thing. I don't think you can force it, and it doesn't necessarily mean t...
TRICIA HELFER I feel to look for perfection is a very dangerous path. More than that, it's dangerous because i...
VINCENT CASSEL

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JAMES ST. JAMES The true nature of evil is that it is so very casual.
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JAMES ST. JAMES Watch out for the average--they're usually hiding something big.
JAMES ST. JAMES There are people who have too much space between their ears, and given the time, do nothing but free...
JAMES ST. JAMES Discord, a sleepless hag who never dies, With Snipe-like nose, and Ferret-glowing eyes, Lean s...
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JAMES ALLEN The law of harvest is to reap more than you sow. Sow an act, and you reap a habit. Sow a habit and y...
JAMES ALLEN I am just happy to be part of the Nike family.
LEBRON JAMES There is a lot of pressure put on me, but I don't put a lot of pressure on myself. I feel if I p...
LEBRON JAMES I'm confident with my ability.
LEBRON JAMES Where I grew up - I grew up on the north side of Akron, lived in the projects. So those scared and l...
LEBRON JAMES But now, being a parent, I go home and see my son and I forget about any mistake I ever made or the ...
LEBRON JAMES There are some teams and logos you see, no matter where you are in the world, and you know exactly w...
LEBRON JAMES Warren Buffet told me once and he said always follow your gut. When you have that gut feeling, you h...
LEBRON JAMES Every night on the court I give my all, and if I'm not giving 100 percent, I criticize myself.
LEBRON JAMES When you have that respect from your teammates, it makes it a lot more comfortable.
LEBRON JAMES I think, team first. It allows me to succeed, it allows my team to succeed.
LEBRON JAMES I'm going to use all my tools, my God-given ability, and make the best life I can with it.
LEBRON JAMES Last year, I was on Threat Matrix. We were on Thursday against Friends and Survivor; so this year it...
JAMES DENTON There's nothing wrong with falling in love and sharing your life with someone.
LILY JAMES Being on a boat that's moving through the water, it's so clear. Everything falls into place ...
JAMES TAYLOR I treated it like every day was my last day with a basketball.
LEBRON JAMES I think a bishop who doesn't give offence to anyone is probably not a good bishop.
JAMES THOMSON It's hard to know which stars in the sky will turn into black holes. And which ones will open up...
JAMES ALTUCHER The James Brown story is not about James Brown. It's about who's getting paid, whose interes...
JAMES MCBRIDE The question of religion in black America is something filmmakers don't want to touch.
JAMES MCBRIDE In a way, light unites the spiritual world and the ephemeral, physical world. People frequently talk...
JAMES TURRELL I know there's Brooklyn and all the boroughs, but Manhattan specifically is so condensed that th...
THEO JAMES The men whose manhood you have broken will loathe you, and will always be brooding and scheming to s...
JAMES LARKIN Supernatural movies generally have a much more brooding pace. If you look at films like 'The Six...
JAMES WAN