Derek Landy quote: "He'd once known a man who said that life hinged on the moment, that everything changed in the blink of an eye. Tesseract knew the truth of that as well as anybody. It was in those moments that he struck, after all, snatching people's lives away. He'd always known that it was only a matter of time before one of those moment's worked against him."

Still, he figured, sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do, and then sometimes you've just ...
DEREK LANDY

Stephanie could see the greed seep into the watery eyes of her
father’s other brother, a horr...
DEREK LANDY

I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.
DEREK LANDY

You are a cynical man, Mr. Pleasant."
"We live in cynical times, Miss Cain.
DEREK LANDY

mostly we've had to found ways to amuse ourselves."
"Really?" Valkyrie asked. "Like what?"
DEREK LANDY

Just because an apple falls one hundred times out of a hundred does not mean it will fall on the hun...
DEREK LANDY

Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed.
"Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he le...
DEREK LANDY

I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly lit...
DEREK LANDY

Every solution to every problem is simple. It's the distance between the two where the mystery lies.
DEREK LANDY

Fletcher appeared beside her. He peered at the baby.
"Can it do any tricks yet?"
"I'm sti...
DEREK LANDY

I had an uneventful few days," it told her. "The most exciting thing was an hour-long lecture from t...
DEREK LANDY

The door handle turned. Someone knocked, and a man's voice called, "Uh, hello?"
Valkyrie looked...
DEREK LANDY

The man had a smooth voice, like velvet. “I’m Detective Inspector Me. Unusual name, I know. My f...
DEREK LANDY

Don’t kill me,” he sobbed as he lay there. “Oh God, please don’t kill me.”
“If you ...
DEREK LANDY

I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall.
DEREK LANDY

Ladies and gentleman," he said over the speakers, "welcome aboard this recently liberated Gulfstream...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie patted Fletcher’s arm. “Don’t worry,” she said. “If the bad man comes, I’ll pro...
DEREK LANDY

Gracious ignored him. "A farmer's daughter, she was, though back then every girl was a farmer's daug...
DEREK LANDY

If he can't get to the clock, any idea how we deal with this lot?"
"With great care," Donegan s...
DEREK LANDY

But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat c...
DEREK LANDY

Of course I want to kill you," said Skulduggery. "I want to kill most people. But then where would I...
DEREK LANDY

Emergency Valve Regulators," she repeated. "So you do know what your doing?
"Not really," he sa...
DEREK LANDY

If things go wrong, I'll lead them away. Once it's clear, get back to the car. If you don't see me i...
DEREK LANDY

Over his shoulder, she saw Skulduggery walk in. "Oh, hell," she muttered.
Wreath's smile reapp...
DEREK LANDY

How are we going to get out of here?"
"Oh, escape is easy once you have the right plan."
"...
DEREK LANDY

They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said.

China glanced at her. "They'...
DEREK LANDY

You accused me of murder. Do you make a habit of bringing schoolgirls into an interview room with mu...
DEREK LANDY

It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance...
DEREK LANDY

I'm sorry,' said the shopkeeper. 'I can't understand your ridiculous accent.'
'My accent?'
DEREK LANDY

Oh, China. How I have missed you.'
'And I have missed you, Eliza. But don't worry, next time my...
DEREK LANDY

He crouched at the car window and looked in. 'What a lovely family you have. What a charming family....
DEREK LANDY

Is he all scarred now?”

“Magic gets rid of most physical scars, but I like to think I...
DEREK LANDY

I need a weapon,” Valkyrie muttered.
“You’re an Elemental with a Necromancer ring, traine...
DEREK LANDY

Kindness suits you."

"Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.
DEREK LANDY

He put on his hat and wrapped his scarf around his jaw, but did without the wig and the sunglasses. ...
DEREK LANDY

Found something?”
“No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more flo...
DEREK LANDY

What would killing the Elders result in?"
"Panic? Fear? Three empty parking spaces in the Sanc...
DEREK LANDY

What is it?' Stephanie whispered.
'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.'
She...
DEREK LANDY

That's ridiculous. The only point in having enemies is so you can defeat them, kill them, brush them...
DEREK LANDY

The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.
DEREK LANDY

The fact is that we have no way of knowing if the person who we think we are is at the core o...
DEREK LANDY

Put a smile on that face, Valkyrie. You're unique. Easily as unique as I am."
"Two freaks in a ...
DEREK LANDY

You're under arrest for multiple counts of murder. You have the right to not much at all, really. Do...
DEREK LANDY

It all depends on what people you're talking about helping. That's the wonderful think about ...
DEREK LANDY

She had been a teenager once, and she knew that, despite the apparent contradictions, a person's tee...
DEREK LANDY

It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows -
DEREK LANDY

I’ve got good news and bad news for you, Ryan. The bad news is that you’re the only one in the w...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie made a face. "Bloody vampires."
Ryan sat forward. "That was a vampire? That guy who lo...
DEREK LANDY

Tanith frowned. Did people still go on DATES any more? She was sure they did. They probably called i...
DEREK LANDY

Look, this is all very, very weird. Why are you focusing on rumours and urban legends? You haven’t...
DEREK LANDY

Here she is,” her mum said, cooing at the baby, “my special girl.”
“Oh, cheers,” Valk...
DEREK LANDY

Doors are for people with no imagination.
DEREK LANDY

You have no idea about presents or what they mean. The last
present you gave me was a stick.”...
DEREK LANDY

Every once in a while, I get the urge. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? The urge for ...
DEREK LANDY

It was a trap. It was so obviously a trap.

Darquesse smiled.
DEREK LANDY

He laughed and was about to retort when she grabbed his collar and pulled him into her. She clamped ...
DEREK LANDY

Ravel said. “And I order people around really well. This morning, Tipstaff came over with a cup of...
DEREK LANDY

Talking about one's feelings defeats the purpose of having those feelings. Once you try to put the h...
DEREK LANDY

The rain battered the cottage. Valkyrie risked a look up at Skulduggery.
“What is it?” she ...
DEREK LANDY

Scapegrace leaped up. “I am the Killer Supreme! I make
murder into an art form!”
Skuld...
DEREK LANDY

Plans are invitation to disappointment.
DEREK LANDY

Skulduggery stood among the ruins of what had once been a sofa. Valkyrie raised an eyebrow.
DEREK LANDY

Skulduggery placed both hands on the table and leaned over. "You've heard about me. You've heard abo...
DEREK LANDY

The traffic warden looked up. "This your car?"
"It is," said Skulduggery.
The traffic wa...
DEREK LANDY

Aurora sagged. "Why is it," she asked, "that every time I'm with you two we end up stealing somethin...
DEREK LANDY

You think Bernadette Maguire killed him?”
“Uh… no. She’s, like I said, she’s old.”<...
DEREK LANDY

The next time? Oh, my dear Eliza, you're not going to carry on with this, are you? The Faceless Ones...
DEREK LANDY

I cannot have chaos erupting around me until I am prepared for it. I am a collector. I am an observe...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie stood there and waited for her to start making sense.
"There is a vegetable-plant hybr...
DEREK LANDY

I am Detective Inspector Me. This is my partner, Detective Her."
The traffic warden frowned. "H...
DEREK LANDY

I... I don't, I don't think I can do this."
"Do what?"
It didn't answer.
"Do the test...
DEREK LANDY

He looked at Ghastly. "Thoughts?"
"I want to kill Sanguine," was the first thing Ghastly said. ...
DEREK LANDY

What are you doing?"
"I'm, uh, acting normal."
"No you're not. You're acting like someone ...
DEREK LANDY

I am what prevents the Accelerator from being a bomb."
"Except you didn't," said Gracious. "Bec...
DEREK LANDY

The Engineer smiled (internally, for of course it had no mouth). It was feeling good. It was feeling...
DEREK LANDY

What's this about slippers?" Stephanie's mom said, walking in.
"Dad's just saying he could neve...
DEREK LANDY

You're not used to early mornings, are you?"
He shook his head. "Early mornings were invented b...
DEREK LANDY

Portia followed after, a smirk on her face, and Syc hissed as he passed.
Donegan waited till th...
DEREK LANDY

Night descended on Roarhaven like a woolly blanket of blackness with holes in it that were the stars...
DEREK LANDY

He things we think he's a double agent, working for them but secretly working for us. He doesn't kno...
DEREK LANDY

Don't open the door to strangers," said her dad. "Unless they're selling something. Then open the do...
DEREK LANDY

I was going straight for Mantis, but then that bloody gas got in my eyes and, I don't know, some mas...
DEREK LANDY

Corrival looked around. 'So is this it? Is everyone here? Erskine, maybe you should start the ball r...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie Cain got out of the passenger side. She zipped up
her black jacket against the cold, a...
DEREK LANDY

Is that it?”
“No. That’s a wall.”
“It could be disguised.”
“You’re no...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie walked to the back door, which hadn't been closed properly, shut it and locked it. There wa...
DEREK LANDY

People!" she screamed. "There are people here! New people!
DEREK LANDY

Every human being who has ever lived has the same potential in them for good and evil. Mortal or sor...
DEREK LANDY

He looked at her. “We’re meant to be together…”
“And this is exactly what I mean.”<...
DEREK LANDY

You should have called us. Desmond would have picked you up.'
'No I wouldn't,' Valkyrie's dad s...
DEREK LANDY

I would love to have a battle of wits with you, Bison, but I doubt it would be a fair fight.'
...
DEREK LANDY

You're in a bad mood,' Skulduggery said. 'I understand. I do. You're saying things that you don't re...
DEREK LANDY

Get away from my ex-girlfriend, you moany little whinge-bag.'
Caelen took a deep breath, like ...
DEREK LANDY

I try not to underestimate my opponents, no matter how ridiculous their beards.
DEREK LANDY

This is your last chance to do the right thing.'
'Do you want to attack first, or will I?'
DEREK LANDY

But if you can confront your inner demons—"

"I did confront my inner demon. I punched h...
DEREK LANDY

I have sought you out to cure me.'
'To cure you of what?'
'Of this cursed affliction.'
DEREK LANDY

You're bored, aren't you.'
'I need constant distraction. Shall we go?'
'Uh, aren't you sup...
DEREK LANDY

I think zombies are kind of cute.”
“Seriously?”
“I may be thinking about bunnies. ...
DEREK LANDY

Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.
DEREK LANDY

You want to see safe hands?' her dad asked. He went to the fruit bowl on the side of the table, took...
DEREK LANDY

By the way, all joking aside, do I call you Ghastly or Elder Bespoke?'
'You can call me whatev...
DEREK LANDY

I kill a sofa for you and you go and sit in a chair?” Skulduggery asked. “I don’t think you ap...
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie dialed Skulduggery's number and he picked up. 'Hey,' she said, 'It's me.'
Skulduggery ...
DEREK LANDY

We're not really intruding," he called down. "This is all a big misunderstanding."
"Stop right ...
DEREK LANDY

We punch people, Valkyrie. That’s who we are. Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.
DEREK LANDY

The only thing we know for certain is that Darquesse is coming, and she's coming to kill us a...
DEREK LANDY

He liked murder. Murder and long walks had been two of his favorite things when he was younger.
DEREK LANDY

He could wear hats. He could wear an assortment of hats of different shapes and styles. Boater hats,...
DEREK LANDY

This is stolen? We're in a stolen jet?"
"Not stolen," said Donegan Bane from the co-pilot's sea...
DEREK LANDY

tanith: have you called the police?
fergus: they, uh, they said theyd call by this afternoon. DEREK LANDY

You don't treat me like a child."
He smiled. "Of course I do, but you seem to have this ...
DEREK LANDY

It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, your
beard’s stupid.”
“Isn’t t...
DEREK LANDY

Clarabelle laughed like she'd just heard the funniest thing ever. "Of course you HOPE you won't die,...
DEREK LANDY

I'm sorry, I don't know what any of you want, or why guns and knives are being waved around, or why ...
DEREK LANDY

That's a shame. I'm sure somebody, somewhere, cares.
DEREK LANDY

Then I reckon we got ourselves a good old-fashioned standoff."
...
Nobody moved, or said a...
DEREK LANDY

We're authors, too," Donegan said, "and we've been trying to get into the picture-book market. We ha...
DEREK LANDY

It's not so bad."
Melancholia looked at her. "You're lying."
"I'll get used to it. So will...
DEREK LANDY

Mum said earlier what a lovely dress
you’re wearing.”
Beryl’s eyebrows wriggled lik...
DEREK LANDY

I should go in alone," Valkyrie said, speaking loudly to be heard. "If we both go in, it'll look to ...
DEREK LANDY

It's a very small object to be capable of doing many wonderful things, don't you think?"
"It do...
DEREK LANDY

He could be a butterfly dreaming he's a man."
"Well, he's not. He's a big fat man dreaming he's...
DEREK LANDY

Doran stood on the dais, fists clenched. "All right," he said. "Let's do it, come on. Charge me up."...
DEREK LANDY

The dart is loaded with enough sedative to bring down a—”

“Small elephant?”
...
DEREK LANDY

Even as she'd been writing it, she wondered if she was using too many exclamation marks, but she was...
DEREK LANDY

You’re seventeen. You’re supposed to be dealing with school and hormones and dim-witted parents....
DEREK LANDY

He said a bad word. Do you want to know what it was? It started with F. It's not the one you're thin...
DEREK LANDY

Grand Mage,” Ghastly said, as he put the map away, “did you know the sparrow flies south for the...
DEREK LANDY

Peace means nothing without freedom.
DEREK LANDY

Now, before you begin to worry, the section of the gaol that I’m standing in is completely secure....
DEREK LANDY

Violence?"Skulduggery said. "Violence is never the answer, until it's the only answer.
DEREK LANDY

We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant
DEREK LANDY

I just want to let you know that I love you all. Even those of you that I don't like; that's you Ber...
DEREK LANDY

Tides do what tides do–they turn.
DEREK LANDY

He does this on purpose," Stephanie's mother said as they sat in the car, seat belts on and ready to...
DEREK LANDY

Wait, do they even know I'm coming with you?"
"No. But they like surprises. Almost always.
DEREK LANDY

Cheer up everyone," he said, a new brightness to his voice. "Since we’re all going to die horribly...
DEREK LANDY

Right, well, we've got to work out what we need. We've got to work out what we need, how we get it, ...
DEREK LANDY

The world is bigger than you know, and scarier than you might imagine. The only currency worth anyth...
DEREK LANDY

Gordon Edgley's sudden death came as a shock to everyone - not least himself. One moment he was in h...
DEREK LANDY

You can only anticipate what someone is going to do if you know exactly what that someone has just d...
DEREK LANDY

You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.
DEREK LANDY

Valkyrie: “You are such a moron.”
Skulduggery: “Don't be jealous of my genius.
DEREK LANDY

Are you kidding? I jumped off a building -- of course I'm hurt.
DEREK LANDY

strike from the shadows, disapear into darkness
DEREK LANDY

I wouldn't mind a sister either."
"Any chance of that happening?"
"I can't see what would ...
DEREK LANDY

I'm sorry? No more smooches is worse than the world ending?
DEREK LANDY

When I meet people, I no longer say "Hi, I'm Derek Landy, pleased to meet you." Now I say "Hi, I'm n...
DEREK LANDY

She's you, without your conscience, or your feelings. She's you without your humanity."
"You're...
DEREK LANDY

Clarabelle...Clarabelle... You worked as Kenspeckle Grouse's assistant, did you not?'
'One of t...
DEREK LANDY

Come and have a go, if you think you're hard enough
DEREK LANDY

Can I just point something out?" Fletcher asked. "That is an awful plan. On a scale of one ...
DEREK LANDY

I've had years to see the funny side.
DEREK LANDY

Stephanie: Why can't you break in? You broke into the Vault
Skulduggery: That's different
DEREK LANDY

Cheer up everyone, since we're all going to die horribly anyway, what's there to be worried about? -...
DEREK LANDY

She held her sword like she was ready to use it on anyone who got close. Darquesse could see her own...
DEREK LANDY

I wasn't always who I am now. No one ever is. I've spent my entire lifetime becoming who I am. Final...
DEREK LANDY

Stephanie thought about the world she’d grown up in, and how different it was from the world she�...
DEREK LANDY

You can only anticipate what someone is going to do if you know know exactly what that someone has j...
DEREK LANDY

If you don't see me in five minutes, then I've probably died a brave and heroic death.
DEREK LANDY

Ah, bless. I've missed her. Do you have bullets?"

"Uh, no."

Skulduggery paused...
DEREK LANDY

What about you?" he asked, his words not much more than a mumble. "Regrets?"

"Many," Skud...
DEREK LANDY

[...} What did I tell you about wandering off? Why don't you ever do anything I say? If I didn't kno...
DEREK LANDY

Serpine: Well, Skulduggery? Where is that tired old defiance - the taunting, the goading? Where are ...
DEREK LANDY

Skulduggery: The fate of the world may depend on whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your...
DEREK LANDY

Stephanie: I wouldn't mind a sister either
Tanith: Any chance of that happening?
Stephan...
DEREK LANDY

Bravery, after all, isn't the absence of fear. Bravery is the acknowledgement and the conquering of ...
DEREK LANDY

be brave
DEREK LANDY

Personally, I thin knees should be kept for the eight or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice s...
DEREK LANDY

Personally, I think knees should be kept for the eight or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice ...
DEREK LANDY

Wow," she said. "It's like you're teaching me something and being all wise."
"You are not easy ...
DEREK LANDY

But he's in shackles, right? You beat him?"
"I like to think I beat him in a moral sense, in th...
DEREK LANDY

It always surprised Valkyrie whenever she realized just how close the weird and the wonderful, and t...
DEREK LANDY

What's a Dullahan?'
'He's a headless horseman, in the service of the banshee.'
'Headless?'...
DEREK LANDY

I mean you ACRES of harm,' Dalrymple growled. 'Untold QUANTITIES of harm. I will visit a whole CONTI...
DEREK LANDY

Personally, I think knees should be kept for the eighth or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice...
DEREK LANDY

So he has no head'
'Thats usually what headless means'
'No head at all?'
'Your really...
DEREK LANDY

Her father sagged as relief spread through him. “I thought
something awful was happening.”<...
DEREK LANDY

Every once in a while, I get the urge. You know what I'm talking about, don't you? The urge for dest...
DEREK LANDY

You can't just sit back on your laurels. You have to constantly innovate.
MARK LANDY

If they do negotiate a lower price, they may open themselves up to litigation by essentially concedi...
MARK LANDY

This should be a highlight of the festival. I think it's a unique event in our area.
JEFF LANDY

If the deals went to shareholders today, we believe Boston Scientific would prevail.
MARK LANDY

I think a lot of folks had not expected them to be back this quickly.
MARK LANDY

I don't see material upside or downside (for Boston Scientific shares) for the next 12 months.
MARK LANDY

[MacMillan] has big shoes to fill and he's inheriting a legacy of 20% earnings growth.
MARK LANDY

While Johnson & Johnson has the clear technology lead, the risk they run is in setting the price. If...
MARK LANDY

I would venture that we are now outside of gentlemanly territory,
MARK LANDY

We are operating in a large vacuum. It's exceedingly difficult to speculate.
MARK LANDY

It was a great day to get a lot of players a chance to play. Now we can focus on getting ready for d...
LANDY FAEDO

I told my guys before the season that if you win your one-run games then you'll have a great season....
LANDY FAEDO

I was a little concerned. We let two leads get away this week, but Tommy made the pitches and the gu...
LANDY FAEDO

That was great pitching from both guys. They're the top two pitchers in the county.
LANDY FAEDO

The good thing is they come out every day, work hard and do what's asked. And we're pretty demanding...
LANDY FAEDO

Go out and play consistent, not be good, just consistent. Just make less mistakes and put the ball i...
LANDY FAEDO

If we hold it when they are practicing in Latrobe, it will be easy for them to come over here for th...
JEFF LANDY

He needed a place to practice so someone from those two families told him to come to Mt. Pleasant. T...
JEFF LANDY

He told me that he would contact me within the next couple of weeks with any information that he can...
JEFF LANDY

We wanted to have just a few categories and make sure we did this right before we got too crazy this...
JEFF LANDY

Derek Landy

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