Here's an easy way to figure out if you're in a cult: If you're wondering whether you're in a cult, the answer is yes.

A father has to be a provider, a teacher, a role model, but most importantly, a distant authority figure who can never be pleased. Otherwise, how will children ever understand the concept of God?

There were people who believed their opportunities to live a fulfilled life were hampered by the number of Asians in England, by the existance of a royal family, by the volume of traffic that passed by their house, by the malice of trade unions, by the power of callous employers, by the refusal of the health service to take their condition seriously, by communism, by capitalism, by atheism, by anything, in fact, but their own futile, weak-minded failure to get a fucking grip.

It's official. Highway patrolmen are not susceptible to the Jedi Mind Trick.

In God's eyes all children are beautiful but here on earth we have higher standards.

Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family.