I don't have a car in Manhattan because you have to choose between a car and an apartment. It's that expensive.

My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.

At 140, 150, that's when the car starts floating. At 160, that's when you start seeing dead relatives. At 180, it's, like, terrifying and exciting.

Any time you can get a muscle car back, it's a good thing.

When I meet people after stand-up shows, they'll bring their cars.

If you're in California, and it's raining, stay home because nobody can drive in the rain. It's like it's raining frogs. They're terrified.