I don't like politicians, and I don't like politics. I definitely don't want to be associated with any of them.

I didn't want to be selling insurance at 40, wondering what would it have been like to do stand-up.

You know those things that you throw the twigs into and it spits them out? That's what I do. The branches are like life, and I throw them into my head and some of it comes out as humor.

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

[Still, such a idea is political dynamite.] The politics are impossible, ... Politicians do this at their peril.