I have only been funny about seventy four per cent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-f...
WILL FERRELL The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wan...
WILL FERRELL One of my first memories of being a kid was, 'I want to have a real job when I grow up.' And...
WILL FERRELL By the time I was ready for college, I didn't know what I wanted to do. I think I secretly wante...
WILL FERRELL Saturday Night Live is such a comedy boot camp in a way, because you get to work with so many differ...
WILL FERRELL America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, badass speed.
WILL FERRELL I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the ...
WILL FERRELL I've never been a conceited person or cocky, never felt boastful, but I always had a sense of se...
WILL FERRELL My dad turned me onto Peter Sellers as a kid. I loved the fact that he was a unique combination of b...
WILL FERRELL When I was a kid, 'Land of the Lost' was my favorite show, just because it was - in the land...
WILL FERRELL Oftentimes, even as a little kid, I would get up before anyone else. My brother would still be sleep...
WILL FERRELL I always just forced myself to do crazy things in public. In college I would push an overhead projec...
WILL FERRELL I was never a class clown or anything like that, but I do remember being in the first grade and my t...
WILL FERRELL I've got no dark secrets, I wasn't beaten up, my parents were kind to me and there was a low...
WILL FERRELL For people who have done comedy after a certain point in time, I think there's a base level of, ...
WILL FERRELL I've always loved watching the news on TV. As a kid, I loved watching Walter Cronkite, for some ...
WILL FERRELL James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole fi...
WILL FERRELL 'Elf' has become this big holiday movie, and I remember running around the streets of New Yo...
WILL FERRELL How classy is it for me to wear these pink tennis shoes with my tux?
WILL FERRELL I'd love to become like Bill Murray, who was so funny on Saturday Night Live and has gone on to do s...
WILL FERRELL When you hear that you're going to be working with a first-time director, sometimes that can be ...
WILL FERRELL Enjoy the little fun things - like taking your kids to school - before they're all grown up.
WILL FERRELL I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food.
WILL FERRELL There's always going to be someone as funny as you or funnier.
WILL FERRELL Members of the Senate and House, if they want to send troops into war, should be forced to send a fa...
WILL FERRELL When a dramatic actor does a funny film, people are like, 'Wonderful! I didn't know he was f...
WILL FERRELL I'm a Progressive. Much in the same way our founding fathers - who, oddly enough, wouldn't g...
WILL FERRELL I loved the structure of the whole movie—these two parallel stories which were illustrating the po...
WILL FERRELL I'd love to become like Bill Murray, who was so funny on 'Saturday Night Live' and has g...
WILL FERRELL I left 'Saturday Night Live' without a film to go to, and I'd filmed 'Old School'...
WILL FERRELL Inappropriate behavior makes me laugh.
WILL FERRELL All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other ...
WILL FERRELL I definitely wanted to leave "Saturday Night Live" at a time when I still enjoyed doing the show. I ...
WILL FERRELL I love playing the macho guy who looks like an idiot.
WILL FERRELL Molly Shannon and I used to always talk about that we really felt strongly that we were comedic acto...
WILL FERRELL I've always wanted to sail around the world in a handmade boat, and I built a boat.
WILL FERRELL In junior high P.E., I was way too shy to take a shower in front of the other kids. It was a horribl...
WILL FERRELL It's rare that you get to actually cast the person that you are using as the type of actor you want ...
WILL FERRELL Whom does the prime minister prefer? Tinky Winkey, Dipsy, Po, or La-La?
WILL FERRELL A lot of people have gotten into comedy because of certain influences in their lives or events that ...
WILL FERRELL All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other ...
WILL FERRELL You always want to do a good job and hopefully, I won't be in something that looks and feels like I'...
WILL FERRELL One of the challenges you will face is finding a job in our depressed economy, ... In fact, the chan...
WILL FERRELL I don't know if there's one individual driver. Ricky is kinda all of the drivers, and none of them a...
WILL FERRELL It's important that this character is played real, or straight, the whole way through and not winkin...
WILL FERRELL I think a lot of the instincts you have doing comedy are really the same for doing drama, in that it...
WILL FERRELL The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: The Complete Second Season
WILL FERRELL I would tend to shy away from that, only because hosting those type of things is an extremely diffic...
WILL FERRELL That's what you love about the stories, he just gets into all this mischief and goes into all the pl...
WILL FERRELL James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for m...
WILL FERRELL Often times I'm confronted with a quote that I don't remember saying. So, on one hand it's very flat...
WILL FERRELL It's amazing what they turn up in those archives
WILL FERRELL I will watch a movie that is quote unquote dark and not get the qualification of what is dark and wh...
WILL FERRELL You don't give a monkey a latte.
WILL FERRELL At the end of the movie I gave Bob Newhart a headshot of mine with tape over the eyes. So that he'd ...
WILL FERRELL giggling, 'You're so cute!'
WILL FERRELL You tend to get reluctant to talk about anything until the day before filming.
WILL FERRELL The only thing I can attribute it to, in leaving the show, is making the right choices or having the...
WILL FERRELL I'm the minority in my house sometimes. My wife is Swedish, and we go to Sweden and everyone is ...
WILL FERRELL Aren't we all striving to be overpaid for what we do?
WILL FERRELL I did plenty of jobs that I hated. I was a bank teller and terrible at it. I parked cars, a valet. I...
WILL FERRELL When I first started doing sketch comedy, I promised myself that if I were ever to have any success ...
WILL FERRELL I think 'SNL' was such a unique thing because it was material you created and you're ver...
WILL FERRELL In the fourth grade, I learned how to fake walking into a door. You know, you hit it with your hand ...
WILL FERRELL When I was ten, I wrote an essay on what I would be when I grew up and said I would be a professiona...
WILL FERRELL Often times I'm confronted with a quote that I don't remember saying. So, on one hand it'...
WILL FERRELL I grew up in an entertainment family, and so I saw how susceptible you are to the ups and downs of t...
WILL FERRELL It's tough for me to get rid of clothes. I grew up in a household with a limited budget and we r...
WILL FERRELL If you are going to wrestle a bear, try to stay away from all fish oil products, you know. I mean it...
WILL FERRELL It'd be great to be in a position where you can make choices regardless of money. My tastes are ...
WILL FERRELL I guess ultimately a lot of comedians just wanna be taken seriously.
WILL FERRELL We don't do it to disrespect the other team or other wrestler. I need to prepare for the states and ...
TOM FERRELL We were brothers off the field, but there was no love lost on it. We fought like cats and dogs. Wes ...
RICK FERRELL That is almost unheard of.
JEFF FERRELL It was a barn-burner right until the very end, and we managed to come out on top. That was the harde...
DON FERRELL We really need to cut down on our own mistakes, use our heads, and start playing with discipline. Ou...
DON FERRELL We shook off the rust early and had one of our better performances of the year.
DON FERRELL It was a really good day for us. We played a top squad and really dominated. It was the perfect warm...
DON FERRELL This is a great group that has done great things for this program. They are a huge part of our succe...
DON FERRELL Panic is never your best first option.
SUZANNE FERRELL The lottery has become the white noise of society. It doesn't stand out as it once would have. As lo...
FERRELL GUILLORY That's what eventually pushed North Carolina over the divide. It gave Governor Easley an argument: W...
FERRELL GUILLORY In general, what they allow folks like me to do is take what I've learned and the resources of the u...
FERRELL GUILLORY They are a way for a big university to enhance its research capacity, enhance its ability to discuss...
FERRELL GUILLORY In times when North Carolina needs more money for education and roads and health care, we certainly ...
FERRELL BLOUNT Sadly, it appears that the N.C. House of Representatives is for sale. It is an institution where eve...
FERRELL BLOUNT He calls it helping his team. What he is really doing is selling out the people of North Carolina.
FERRELL BLOUNT These classes are very much popular. Parents are almost requiring that people who are taking care of...
JASON FERRELL Our hearts were racing as we stood there watching Jimmy at the line, but we knew he could do it beca...
JASON FERRELL I hadn't been driving to the basket all game, so they didn't expect it when I starting doing it in o...
JASON FERRELL It's crucial for us to give ourselves scoring chances on fast breaks. It all starts with our defense...
JASON FERRELL What they have to offer is more valuable to parents because of the training, education and knowledge...
JASON FERRELL Our goal is to train people to prepare for and prevent emergencies.
JASON FERRELL We played with intensity and we're a good team when we play this way.
JASON FERRELL Something was in her mouth. Sami's tongue slid along the edges of something plastic. Flat, low ridge...
SUZANNE FERRELL Unrest has entered the hearts of men. When unrest is left to fester, Chaos will soon follow.
S.D. FERRELL When we walked out there, everything under the mound was dry. But there's that layer of two inches t...
JEFF FERRELL We didn't play well in a couple aspects of the game. Against McLean we didn't play defense and at So...
JEFF FERRELL It seems sure to backfire if the intention was to silence their critics.
JEFF FERRELL There's really no gain the $300 increase incentive they're making about the same money and they're r...
JEFF FERRELL The problem is if we allow, especially new people hired the option to whether they chose to be a par...
JEFF FERRELL The first thing that comes to mind is that these are African Americans and how will they be treated....
JEFF FERRELL In some ways this is comparable to the close of the Civil War, or the Dust Bowl, but we have greater...
JEFF FERRELL I don't necessarily believe in organized religion.
WILL SMITH I love being black in America, and especially being black in Hollywood.
WILL SMITH When you create art, the world has to wait.
WILL SMITH I have a great time with my life, and I wanna share it.
WILL SMITH In my mind, I've always been an A-list Hollywood superstar. Y'all just didn't know yet.
WILL SMITH You can cry, ain't no shame in it.
WILL SMITH I've never really viewed myself as particularly talented. I've viewed myself as slightly abo...
WILL SMITH I've trained myself to illuminate the things in my personality that are likable and to hide and ...
WILL SMITH I don't know what my calling is, but I want to be here for a bigger reason. I strive to be like ...
WILL SMITH We all want to be in love and find that person who is going to love us no matter how our feet smell,...
WILL SMITH Whatever your dream is, every extra penny you have needs to be going to that.
WILL SMITH I want the world to be better because I was here.
WILL SMITH So if you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready, and that is how I run my life.
WILL SMITH Life is lived on the edge.
WILL SMITH If you're not willing to work hard, let someone else do it. I'd rather be with someone who d...
WILL SMITH The first step is you have to say that you can.
WILL SMITH Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
WILL ROGERS Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
WILL ROGERS There's so much negative imagery of black fatherhood. I've got tons of friends that are doin...
WILL SMITH When liberty becomes license, dictatorship is near.
WILL DURANT Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
WILL ROGERS Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
WILL ROGERS The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
WILL ROGERS I really feel like the sky is the limit. I'm a dreamer, and I dream in full vivid color HD.
WILL PACKER I'm a student of patterns. At heart, I'm a physicist. I look at everything in my life as try...
WILL SMITH Civilization exists by geological consent, subject to change without notice.
WILL DURANT We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
WILL DURANT And where I excel is ridiculous, sickening, work ethic. You know, while the other guy's sleeping...
WILL SMITH Never let yesterday use up too much of today.
WILL ROGERS I am a regular, if not exactly enthusiastic, patron of my local bookshop. I try to buy at least some...
WILL SELF I've always considered myself to be just average talent and what I have is a ridiculous insane o...
WILL SMITH I try to speak my points of view about black America, and how I feel about black men and the role th...
WILL SMITH It's quite highly possible that I have peaked. I mean, I just can't imagine what else I coul...
WILL SMITH I am the black sheep of my family. They are all super talented and intelligent and got proper jobs. ...
WILL POULTER It is fair to say that insofar as sport is taken seriously by those who play it, then to that extent...
WILL SELF One of the most heartening phenomena in today's Britain is the great diversity of the modern ner...
WILL SELF I think the greatest all-around athlete ever was Jim Brown. He played lacrosse, basketball and ran t...
WILL MCDONOUGH When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds.
WILL ROGERS I just felt that I might to go to university and get some real life. It wasn't stimulating in th...
WILL POULTER Somehow I got a place at Bristol University. I'm still waiting for the phone call to say that th...
WILL POULTER My youngest brother and I went on a ten-day canoe trip in Bowron Provincial Park in British Columbia...
WILL HOBBS I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody a chance to get...
WILL ROGERS I have no Politics. I am for the Party that is out of Power, no matter which one it is. But I will g...
WILL ROGERS When I die, my epitaph or whatever you call those signs on gravestones is going to read: I joked abo...
WILL ROGERS Here it is, a New Year. We got to make some resolutions, as well as interest and tax payments in thi...
WILL ROGERS Everybody is ignorant only on different subjects.
WILL ROGERS Lord, the money we do spend on Government and its not one bit better than the government we got for ...
WILL ROGERS There is no credit to being a comedian, when you have the whole Government working for you. All you ...
WILL ROGERS We can make this thing into a Party, instead of a Memory.
WILL ROGERS Youve got to be an optimist to be a Democrat, and youve got to be a humorist to stay one.
WILL ROGERS I am not a member of any organized partyI am a Democrat.
WILL ROGERS And kid Congress and the Senate, dont scold em. They are just children thats never grown up. They do...
WILL ROGERS I originated a remark many years ago that I think has been copied more than any little thing that Iv...
WILL ROGERS I never met a man I didn't like.
WILL ROGERS All politics takes place on a slippery slope. The most important four words in politics are up to a ...
GEORGE WILL A politician's words reveal less about what he thinks about his subject than what he thinks about hi...
GEORGE WILL Politics should share one purpose with religion: the steady emancipation of the individual through t...
GEORGE WILL Joy comes from using your potential.
WILL SCHULTZ Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
WILL DURANT When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds
WILL ROGERS To appreciate heaven well, it's good for a person to have some fifteen minutes of hell.
WILL CARLETON But I have learned a thing or two; I know as sure as fate, When we lock up our lives for wealth, t...
WILL CARLETON The editor sat in his sanctum, his countenance furrowed with care, His mind at the bottom of busi...
WILL CARLETON Overall, I think Michael Jordan is the greatest athlete in any particular sport. He dominated the ga...
WILL MCDONOUGH I think with movies I am really connecting to the Joseph Campbell idea of the collective unconscious...
WILL SMITH Never trust a duck.
WILL HERONDALE Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Cong...
WILL ROGERS As a bookish adolescent, I sopped up texts as if I were blotting paper and they were fluid.
WILL SELF Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committ...
GEORGE WILL The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse ...
WILL ROGERS Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
WILL ROGERS I've been collecting articles on extremophile bacteria for at least the last ten years. I find t...
WILL HOBBS You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people.
WILL ROGERS It's great to be great, but it's greater to be human.
WILL ROGERS I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody chance to get s...
WILL ROGERS The most interesting thing in the world is another human being who wonders, suffers and raises the q...
WILL DURANT Diplomats are just as essential in starting a war as soldiers are in finishing it.
WILL ROGERS Do anything in this world but monkey with somebody eles's religion. What reasoning of conceit makes ...
WILL ROGERS Fanatical religion driven to a certain point is almost as bad as none at all, but not quite.
WILL ROGERS It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
WILL ROGERS I think hopefully we've got enough brain cells left to decide if our music is really worth somet...
WILL CHAMPION Someone. Everyone. Anyone. No-one. One. One can't be everyone, but there isn't more than one everyon...
WILL ADVISE Strangers are just friends I haven't met yet.
WILL ROGERS I need to try and get away from that brat role, or people are going to think I'm a natural brat.
WILL POULTER Having no applicable skills, in any possible area whatsoever, effectively makes me the master of red...
WILL ADVISE I flow like a butter in the nailed pan I stole. I also kept the nail, to polish and use as a means o...
WILL ADVISE In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You bein...
WILL ROGERS Believe in something for another world, but don't be too set on what it is, and then you won't start...
WILL ROGERS The person with the best job in the country is the vice president. All he has to do is get up every ...
WILL ROGERS I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
WILL ROGERS I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.
WILL ROGERS No party is as bad as its leaders.
WILL ROGERS Politics is not worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space.
WILL ROGERS The more you read and observe about this politics thing, the more you've got to admit that each part...
WILL ROGERS The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
WILL ROGERS This country has gotten where it is in spite of politics, not by the aid of it. That we have carried...
WILL ROGERS The reason political party platforms are so long is that when you straddle anything it takes a long ...
WILL ROGERS