I eat so much mayonnaise they were going to send me to the Mayo Clinic.


Tom Robbins

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Go to Cleveland Clinic, Mayo Clinic, or any college and you'll see libraries, dormitories, and a...
FOSTER FRIESS
I love mayonnaise. Every birthday when I was a kid I'd go to Black Angus and just dip my burger ...
BLAKE ANDERSON
Studying literature at Harvard is like learning about women at the Mayo Clinic.
ROY BLOUNT, JR.
Studying literature at Harvard is like learning about women at the Mayo Clinic.
ROY BLOUNT JR.
Studying literature at Harvard is like learning about women at the Mayo clinic.
ROY JR. BLOUNT
One of my favorite things is mayonnaise and I have to tell you that. I love mayonnaise, but I don...
MIKE DITKA
In November, 1964 when I was a patient at the Mayo Clinic I though seriously about killing myself.
JERRY KRAMER
There's a lot of arrogance in the medical community. There are good, reliable websites you can g...
TOM BROKAW
These new data from the Mayo Clinic certainly help support the case for using aspirin before surgery...
ERIC TOPOL
Of Mayo Clinic applicants for nursing positions, 60 percent cite the Magnet award as a factor for ap...
DOREEN FRUSTI
The Mayo Clinic is one of the largest and most experienced medical centers treating esophageal cance...
HARMON KILLEBREW
It is more important to be free than to be happy.
TOM ROBBINS
Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.
ROBIN WILLIAMS
Washington is going to send another packet for me to send back, so the money is coming.
BUD PISAREK
I didn't think they were going to pressure us so much.
LUKE ENOS
He's the only vet clinic in Smiths Station, so I think it's going to be a boom.
SANDY WILSON
The medical professionals have given so much of their time and expertise to the clinic that we wante...
BOBBY MCGEE
Life is made of fear. Some people eat fear soup three times a day. Some people eat fear soup all the...
MARTIN AMIS
When I fouled out, my teammates looked at me and told me they were going to win it for me. They were...
HARDING NANA
I eat a lot. I'm a big sandwich dude. Turkey, mayonnaise, mustard, cheese, yes. I love craft ser...
JASON MITCHELL
Our days are numbered. One of the primary goals in our lives should be to prepare for our last day. ...
BILLY GRAHAM
Give me five minutes with a person's checkbook, and I will tell you where their heart is.
BILLY GRAHAM
How often we commit our burdens to the Lord and then fail to trust Him by taking matters into our ow...
BILLY GRAHAM
I can tell you that God is alive because I talked to him this morning.
BILLY GRAHAM
Theology never changes. A man's heart is the same. The Gospel is the same. There have been no additi...
BILLY GRAHAM
The market is still waiting for HSBC results, which will have a big impact on the direction of the m...
ANDREW TO
Property shares had a technical rebound, but interest rate concerns will still affect properties unt...
ANDREW TO
Bank of China's results were quite good; double-digit growth can be taken as good results for a bank...
ANDREW TO
The index tried to challenge 18,000 but failed, so that triggered profit taking. Tokyo's slide also ...
ANDREW TO
Trading seems to be focusing on selective counters because investors are cautious amid interest rate...
ANDREW TO
We're seeing a minor technical rebound after Wall Street rebounded from two days of losses. The key ...
ANDREW TO
Some investors have returned to pick up the stock at bargain prices.
ANDREW TO
I think the take-up for the placement is not too good and other property developers may be discourag...
ANDREW TO
We are afraid that our freedoms and liberties will be infringed in the future.
ANDREW TO
I think there was some minor selling pressure on telecom stocks as the market continued to see a wea...
ANDREW TO
I'd really like to do a movie again with Tim Robbins and Clint Eastwood. They were really good g...
CAYDEN BOYD
I was on the board of the Mayo Clinic. I was diagnosed there, and I could pick up the phone and get ...
TOM BROKAW
They're so generous, the American fans. They send money to the various charities I support. I tr...
MARTIN CLUNES
We are going to rebuild the medical clinic as soon as possible so that the local communities have ac...
GARY DAVIS
It's typical Robbins in that it's beautiful and as enjoyable to watch as it is to dance, ... It's so...
JULIE KENT
I don't think they're going to send me to Alcatraz.
BILL CALLAHAN
Oh, I am such a little piggy. Everyone is always mad at me because I eat so much. They're like, ...
JOYCE GIRAUD
President Robbins was so well adjusted to his environment that sometimes you could not tell which wa...
RANDALL JARRELL
Friendship is a double-edged sword one side it can be great and true but the other side it spells be...
GARY F EVANS...
I don't think they knew that they were going to get this far. And I don't even think they know I pla...
DOMINIQUE ENGLISH
Prayer is simply a two-way conversation between you and God.
BILLY GRAHAM
Whoever it was that stole the ruby slippers they have not only robbed the museum, and robbed me of t...
MICHAEL SHAW
The greatest time in my career was in Toronto with Tom Cheek and Jerry Howarth, ... They were both s...
GEORGE BELL
We found we were saving so much on groceries by doing this. And we're no longer going out to eat eve...
LORI ZIMMERMAN
I wanted to go to the Arc really bad, and it bothered me that I had to eat my own words that we were...
KEN RAMSEY
They that study much, ought not to eat so much as those that work hard, their Digestion being not so...
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
So much of our work in Iraq has dealt with talking to families of people taken prisoner. Our work is...
CLIFF KINDY
She really said no to nothing. I think Tom Robbins named her. She officially changed her name to Aur...
DANA RUST
I don't think they were attacking me. I think they were going to their guy.
AL HARRIS
I don't think of eggs as being fundamental to the flavor of mayonnaise, but they are to Hollanda...
WYLIE DUFRESNE
There was a time in my life that my mother told me that they didn't know whether they were going...
ELLEN GREENE
I am the planet's most affectionate life-form, something like the cross between a golden retriever a...
ELIZABETH GILBERT
The kids were giving the hepatitis A virus to mom, dad and Uncle Tom. And so if they didn't get the ...
WILLIAM SCHAFFNER
The kids were giving the hepatitis A virus to mom, dad and Uncle Tom. And so if they didn't get the ...
DR. WILLIAM SCHAFFNER
I grew up in the inner city of Chicago, and then I moved to Robbins, and it kind of raised me. When ...
DWYANE WADE
When I told (the crew) we were going to New Orleans this year, as soon as the words were out of my m...
HARRY FRIEDMAN
Ev'n so, with all submission, I . . . . Send you each year a homely letter, Who may retu...
MATTHEW PRIOR
It's a walk-in clinic, so we don't know much about the cases [before the clients come in].
KATHERINE GARREN
I never thought tennis was going to give me so much satisfaction.
GABRIELA SABATINI
It was a very, very busy clinic. When they first started out it was really geared towards lower-inco...
JANET SACAVAGE
Congratulations, to the people which made gotham series, still need some more and extra work!
DEYTH BANGER
To have the cognitive abilities to do research and development is vital to a forever expanding world...
GARY F EVANS...
The first and foremost human right or fundamental right is the right to exist.
APURVA GAGLANI
If we ever put research into what the subconscious is we could probably come to the conclusion that ...
GARY F EVANS...
i know im not the girl you wanted. not the one you want to hear from. but what you see is what you g...
SIMI GREWAL
Many people submit to excessive appetites without realizing that they do not need to eat so much foo...
KATE SMITH
I encourage everyone to send in the update form so I can send them new map pages, which they can eas...
CLINT LAND
I have so much to talk about. I have so much to share. There are so many different emotions going on...
BRANDY NORWOOD
Tom Welter (the OSAA executive director) told me they were getting a hearings officer ready to go (t...
DON ALEXANDER
I loved to party with the Rat Pack; they were so much fun.
DEBBIE REYNOLDS
At first, I thought they were going to kill me.
MARCELINO ALFARO
You see I have to be in the clinic every Thursday and it's in Phoenix so I have to fly down or d...
LEE HAZLEWOOD
The grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something...
GEORGE WASHINGTON BURNAP
This was pretty substantial, the fact that they got 10 cases of beer to wash down all the food they ...
BOB CARPENTER
My sister having so much to do, was going to church vicariously, that is to say, Joe and I were goin...
CHARLES DICKENS
Albert Camus wrote that the only serious question is whether to kill yourself or not.
Tom Robbi...
TOM ROBBINS
If they want to send two guys at me, that's fine. It doesn't mean they're going to be able to stop u...
JAVON WALKER
They were talking to me on the court, saying they were going to stop me. I took it real personal, th...
JUNIOR SALTERS
Those drugs were either going to bring me nirvana or they were going to kill me. I was sure of it. A...
JOSS SHELDON
I also like to eat very much, so I like all different types of foods.
PETER STEELE
A deer hunter flipped the switch for me. He dropped two books on my desk 'Diet for a New America' b...
BRENDA DAVIS
A deer hunter flipped the switch for me. He dropped two books on my desk — 'Diet for a New America'...
BRENDA DAVIS
Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.
FINLEY PETER DUNNE
Well, I don't think we should go to the moon. I think we maybe should send some politicians up t...
RON PAUL
When I first got called up last year, J.J. and I were basically the only two guys on the team (that ...
RICKIE WEEKS
People have more fun if they don't eat so much they have to be taken home in an ambulance.
INA GARTEN
The need for health care reform is clear. Mayo Clinic steadfastly holds to our primary value that 't...
DENIS CORTESE
In those days the multitude being very great, and having nothing to eat, Jesus called his disciples ...
BIBLE
Going to the moon was a fable. Resetting aging is a fable, but that's what we're setting out...
MICHAEL FOSSEL
I don't think (prices) are going up as much as they were. But I don't think they're going to drop.
HERMAN PETRECCA
It was funny to me. I just kept laughing. They thought they were going to beat us. I don't know what...
ALEX MONTGOMERY
Get this (economic plan) passed. Later on, we can all debate it.
, TO NEW HAMPSHIRE LEGISLATORS
They're going to go home and every time they eat an apple, they'll remember how much sugar is produc...
JOE SABOL
And her dumplings were so light they would float in the air and you'd have to catch 'em to eat 'em.
FANNIE FLAGG
Women served at this clinic are going to have adequate access to hospitals.
AL GERHARDSTEIN

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If one yearns to see the face of the Divine, one must break out of the aquarium, escape the fish far...
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In the end, perhaps we should simply imagine a joke; a long joke that's continually retold in an acc...
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Three of the four elements are shared by all creatures, but fire was a gift to humans alone. Smoking...
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Never underestimate how much assistance, how much satisfaction, how much comfort, how much soul and ...
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We use so much bad language that it forms a barrier between ourselves and the truth.
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The harsh truth is, most red-haired men look like blondes who've spoiled from lack of refrigerat...
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True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced. A truly stable system...
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There is no such thing as a weird human being, It's just that some people require more understanding...
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When she was a small girl, Amanda hid a ticking clock in an old, rotten tree trunk. It drove woodpec...
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...to emphasize the afterlife is to deny life. To concentrate on Heaven is to create hell. In their ...
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The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only ...
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People aren't trees, so it is false when they speak of roots.
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In fiction, when you paint yourself into a corner, you can write a pair of suction cups onto the bot...
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White folks have controlled New Orleans with money and guns, black folks have controlled it with mag...
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One tended to lose one’s bearings in the presence of willful and persistent acts of craziness, and...
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Well, Daddy, I used to believe that artists went crazy in the process of creating the beautiful work...
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The one thing emphasized in any creative writing course is 'write what you know,' and that a...
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We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.
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The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and irreplaceable being.
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A child's mind is its living room; it's going to be residing there for the rest of its earth...
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The sky was the color of Edgar Allan Poe's pajamas.
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Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when th...
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Consider how hard it is to change yourself and you'll understand what little chance you have in tryi...
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When I sit down to write, I just let the goose out of the bottle.
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The trouble with the fast lane is that all the movement is horizontal. And I like to go vertical som...
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We've got something for just about everyone. I think our horsemen and our fans are going to be tickl...
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It is easier to play around with a man's wife than with his cliches.
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The Friendship Center has brought together a lot of couples.
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Ideas are mallable and unstable; they not only can be misused, they invite misuse---and the better t...
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In order to be respected, authority has got to be respectable.
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We're proposing some stakes increases and more significant increases than the prior year. If the TOC...
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The best kisses, though, are those between lovers, because those are the consequential ones, the ris...
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To some extent, Seattle remains a frontier metropolis, a place where people can experiment with thei...
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Are you aware that rushing toward a goal is a sublimated death wish? It's no coincidence we call the...
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In times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings--arti...
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I'm not infatuated with frivolousness. We're just good friends.
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The trickster's function is to break taboos, create mischief, stir things up. In the end, the tr...
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Most Americans pay lip service to the idea of freedom, but can't handle real freedom.
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Let us live for the beauty of our own reality.
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People write memoirs because they lack the imagination to make things up.
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Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular...
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When I go to the shore, I take along the poems of Pablo Neruda. I suppose it's because the poems...
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In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak.
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Jerusalem was capital of southern Israel, known then as Judah. Isn't it true that there's always a r...
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Modern Romans insisted that there was only one god, a notion that struck Alobar as comically simplis...
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Often, moreover, it is...that aspect of our being that society finds eccentric, ridiculous, or disag...
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You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans.
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The enemy of the black is not the white. The enemy of capitalist is not communist, the enemy of homo...
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You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have y...
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Our world isn't made of earth, air and water or even molecules and atoms; our world is made of l...
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Well, I believe life is a Zen koan, that is, an unsolvable riddle. But the contemplation of that rid...
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If every time we choose a turd, society, at a great expense, simply allows us to redeem it for a pep...
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Our greatest human adventure is the evolution of consciousness. We are in this life to enlarge the s...
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Madame Lily Devalier always asked "Where are you?" in a way that insinuated that there were only two...
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Louisiana in September was like an obscene phone call from nature. The air--moist, sultry, secretive...
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He was becoming unstuck, he was sure of that - his bones were no longer wrapped in flesh but in clou...
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There is a comfort in conformity, a security in control, that is appealing. There is a thrill in dom...
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salvation is for the feeble, that's what I think. I don't want salvation, I want life, all of life, ...
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Does koala bear poop smell like cough drops?
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The word desire suggests that there is something we do not have. If we have everything already, then...
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When we accept small wonders, we qualify ourselves to imagine great wonders.
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The rich are the most discriminated-against minority in the world. Openly or covertly, everybody hat...
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Should you fail to pilot your own ship, don't be surprised at what inappropriate port you find yours...
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Meet me in Cognito, baby. In Cognito, we'll have nothing to hide.
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Louisiana in September was like an obscene phone call from nature. The air - moist, sultry, secretiv...
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There is plenty of misery in the world, all right, but there is ample pleasure, as well. If a person...
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Perhaps the most terrible (or wonderful) thing that can happen to an imaginative youth, aside from t...
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Philosophers have argued for centuries about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, but mat...
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The only bubble in the flat champagne of February is Valentine’s Day. It was no accident that our ...
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It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful, like the flowers, than large, cons...
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Hold on to your divine blush, your innate rosy magic, or end up brown. Once you're brown, you'll fin...
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Christianity is merely a system for turning priestesses into handmaidens, queens into concubines, an...
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Breathe properly. Stay curious. And eat your beets.
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It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful...
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If you lack the iron and the fuzz to take control of your own life, if you insist on leaving your fa...
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To achieve the impossible, it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.
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To diminish the worth of women, men had to diminish the worth of the moon. They had to drive a wedge...
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The beet is the most intense of vegetables. The radish, admittedly, is more feverish, but the fire o...
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Our individuality is all, all, that we have. There are those who barter it for security, those who r...
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A sense of humor...is superior to any religion so far devised.
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The unhappy person resents it when you try to cheer him up, because that means he has to stop dwelli...
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Hitchhiking is not a sport. It is not an art. It certainly isn't work, for it requires no particular...
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If a girl wants to grow up to be a cowgirl, she ought to be able to do it, or else this world ain't ...
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Well,' said Can o' Beans, a bit hesitantly,' imprecise speech is one of the major causes of mental i...
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On the right side-panel of the verbose and somewhat tautological box of Cheerios, it is written,
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Who knows how to make love stay?


Tell love you are going to the Junior's Deli on Flatb...
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The sky was the color of Edgar Allan Poe's pajamas.
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You are a complicated man, but happily complicated. You have found a way to be at home with the worl...
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Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it
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Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide.
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As unrefined and basic as an animal's emotional equipment may be, it is not insensitive to freedom. ...
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When they tell you to grow up, they mean stop growing.
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Human folly does not impede the turning of the stars.
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There are people in this world who can wear whale masks and people who cannot, and the wise know to ...
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Beauty! Wasn't that what mattered? Beauty was hardly a popular ideal at that jumpy moment in history...
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Death is impatient and thoughtless. It barges into your room when you are right in the middle of som...
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I believe in political solutions to political problems. But man's primary problems aren't political;...
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Those who possess wisdom cannot just ladle it out to every wantwit and jackanapes who comes along an...
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Perhaps that is why desire causes men calamity. By identifying with our desires and taking them too ...
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After the monkeys came down from the trees and learned to hurl sharp objects, they had had to move i...
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I mean that gods do not limit men. Men limit men.
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The Divine was beyond description, beyond knowing, beyond comprehension. To say that the Divine was ...
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The Divine was expansive, but religion was reductive. Religion attempted to reduce the Divine to a k...
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It is more important to be free than to be happy.
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We're making it up. The world, the universe, life, reality. Especially reality.
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Our lives are not as limited as we think they are; the world is a wonderfully weird place; consensua...
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Religion is nothing but institutionalized mysticism. The catch is, mysticism does not lend itself to...
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If New Orleans is not fully in the mainstream of culture, neither is it fully in the mainstream of t...
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Bones are patient. Bones never tire nor do they run away. When you come upon a man who has been dead...
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Cries for help are frequently inaudible.
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As long as a population can be induced to believe in a supernatural hereafter, it can be oppressed a...
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...ideas are definitely unstable, they not only CAN be misused, they invite misuse--and the better t...
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If desire causes suffering, it may be because we do not desire wisely, or that we are inexpert at ob...
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There is evidence that the honoree [Leonard Cohen] might be privy to the secret of the universe, whi...
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We modern human beings are looking at life, trying to make some sense of it; observing a 'reality' t...
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Very well. He'd lighten up. As a matter of fact, he felt as light as the bubbly froth that flew from...
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They accepted my donation, so they're aware they'd better serve my interests or I'll buy some leader...
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Unhappiness is the ultimate form of self-indulgence.
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The international situation is desperate, as usual.
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Beware the man who considers kissing as nothing more than duty, a sop to the "weaker" sex, an annoyi...
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The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and irreplacable being.
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Whining's unattractive, even when your whine sounds like Kenneth Branagh eating frozen strawberries ...
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Human beings were not well served by permanence or stasis. Obviously, if individuals were progressin...
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Now tequila may be the favoured beverage of outlaws but that doesn't mean it gives them preferential...
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Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is to sign...
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I believe in nothing, everything is sacred. I believe in everything, nothing is sacred.
TOM ROBBINS
Our Similarities bring us to a common ground; Our Differences allow us to be fascinated by each othe...
TOM ROBBINS
There is no such thing as a weird human being, It's just that some people require more understanding...
TOM ROBBINS
If it is committed in the name of God or country, there is no crime so heinous that the public will ...
TOM ROBBINS
It's been a positive thing for us. I think it's excellent.
TOM ROBBINS
What is it that separates human beings from the so-called lower animals? Well, as I see it, its exac...
TOM ROBBINS
Should one be shallow enough to view existence as a system of rewards and punishments, one soon lear...
TOM ROBBINS
We had a lot of young players this season. I thought they have improved over the course of the year....
TOM ROBBINS
There's always the same amount of good luck and bad luck in the world. If one person doesn't get the...
TOM ROBBINS
That's for God sure. People write memoirs because they lack the imagination to make things up.
TOM ROBBINS
Their desperate craving for simplicity sure can create complications. And their pitiful longing for ...
TOM ROBBINS
Who knows how to make love stay?Tell love you are going to the Junior's Deli on Flatbush Avenue in B...
TOM ROBBINS
Logic only gives man what he needs...Magic gives him what he wants.
TOM ROBBINS
The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only ...
TOM ROBBINS
When life demands more of people than they demand of life - as is ordinarily the case - what results...
TOM ROBBINS
To achieve the impossible; it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.
TOM ROBBINS
The afternoon passed more slowly than a walnut-sized kidney stone.
TOM ROBBINS
Using words to describe magic is like using a screwdriver to cut roast beef
TOM ROBBINS
Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide.
TOM ROBBINS
I've decided to take advantage of outsourcing. My next novel will be written by a couple of guys...
TOM ROBBINS
To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being.
TOM ROBBINS
On their sofas of spice and feathers, the concubines also slept fretfully. In those days the Earth w...
TOM ROBBINS
The brutal truth is, we're scarcely 'educating' children at all. Even if you overlook th...
TOM ROBBINS
Whether a man is a criminal or a public servant is purely a matter of perspective.
TOM ROBBINS
Alas, Gulietta, this was an American frog of the last quarter of the twentieth century, a time when ...
TOM ROBBINS
There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who believe there are two kinds of people in this...
TOM ROBBINS
Conversation between a princess and an outlaw:
"If I stand for fairy-tale balls and dragon bai...
TOM ROBBINS
There are landscapes in which we feel above us not sky but space. Something larger, deeper than sky ...
TOM ROBBINS
If you believe in peace, act peacefully; if you believe in love, acting lovingly; if you believe eve...
TOM ROBBINS
Now tequila may be the favored beverage of outlaws but that doesn't mean it gives them preferential ...
TOM ROBBINS
But why diminish your soul being run-of-the-mill at something? Mediocrity: now there is ugliness for...
TOM ROBBINS
But do we know how to make love stay?'
I can't even think about it. The best I can do is play i...
TOM ROBBINS
Disorder is inherent in stability. Civilized man doesn't understand stability. He's confused it with...
TOM ROBBINS
I am cheerful. I don't know if I'm happy. There is a difference, you know.
TOM ROBBINS
At the typewriter you find out who you are.
TOM ROBBINS