I got some news for you. One, there is no Jesus. Two, there is no God. Three, mind your own business and everything works out.

The interns recommended a new, Survivor format for news anchors. Every week viewers can vote to banish a news reporter off to 60 Minutes, 48 hours, or some other pseudo-news program. The one who's left will be our new anchor.

They say making laws is like making sausages. You shouldn't watch. It's the same for acting, especially for the actor who works unconsciously.

Some of my earliest political feelings were based on the anti-Japanese bubblegum cards I got. There were also Spanish Civil War bubblegum cards. Awful.

They're sheep. They like Bush enough to credit him with saving the nation after 9/11. Three thousand people get killed, and everybody thinks they're next on the list. The president comes along, and he's got his six-guns strapped on, and people think he's going to save them.

In a way, 'WALL-E' had some of the same disturbing elements that 'Up' does.