I had a wonderful experience on the golf course today. I had a hole in nothing. Missed the ball and sank the divot.


Don Adams

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We've heard they've had signs up about Cuero for the last three weeks. We're excited about playing t...
JOEY ADAMS
Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. 'Get up early, work late -- and strike oil.'
JOEY ADAMS
If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business.
JOEY ADAMS
A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.
JOEY ADAMS
Most people play a fair game of golf - If you watch them.
JOEY ADAMS
People are still willing to do an honest day's work. The trouble is they want a week's pay for it.
JOEY ADAMS
A bikini is like a barbed-wire fence. It protects the property without obstructing the view.
JOEY ADAMS
May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions
JOEY ADAMS
Of course, it's very easy to be witty tomorrow, after you get a chance to do some research and reh...
JOEY ADAMS
Some say that the universe is made so that when we are about to understand it it changes into somet...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry, and has been wid...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
In peace, competition had become difficult, until the British ship owner cried for war; yet he alrea...
HENRY ADAMS
Absolute liberty is absence of restraint; responsibility is restraint; therefore, the ideally free i...
HENRY ADAMS
The progress of evolution from President Washington to President Grant was alone evidence enough to ...
HENRY ADAMS
Morality is a private and costly luxury
HENRY ADAMS
A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell, where his influence stops.
HENRY ADAMS
Intimates are predestined
HENRY ADAMS
Chaos often breeds life, when order breeds habit
HENRY ADAMS
In plain words, Chaos was the law of nature Order was the dream of man.
HENRY ADAMS
Man is an imperceptible atom always trying to become one with God.
HENRY ADAMS
Chaos often breeds life when order breeds habit.
HENRY ADAMS
Politics, as a practice, whatever its professions, has always been the systematic organization of ha...
HENRY ADAMS
I have written too much history to have faith in it; and if anyone thinks I'm wrong, I am inclined...
HENRY ADAMS
You say that love is nonsense....I tell you it is no such thing. For weeks and months it is a stea...
HENRY ADAMS