I have friends who say, 'You just can't understand what it's like to be a mother until you're a mother.'

My friends who have babies can't do anything. You can't go out at night. Having a baby is like a DUI from the universe.

Comedy is just one of the many professions that women are taking over.

What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around the country, and sometimes the world, and work on it and see how people react. You don't need Standards & Practices or notes from lawyers or producers to tell you what's funny.

I always wanted so much glamour in my life, so I have always been obsessed with class, and from dating a few people who were from old money and a few from new money in my 20s, I just sort of became obsessed with this idea of clueless rich people.

I'm not 'one of the guys.' I don't want to pretend to be one on stage. I'm not going to dress like a guy or carry myself like one.