I have lost control over everything, even the places in my head.

I want to drag knives over my skin, just to feel something other than shame, but I'm not even brave enough for that

I spent a lot of time writing about tax and pensions and mortgages.

He lied all the time, about everything. Even when he didn't need to, even when there was no point. ... Tom's whole life was constructed on lies — falsehoods and half-truths told to make him look better, stronger, more interesting than he was. And I bought them. I fell for them all. ... I wonder whether [I] would have loved the weaker, flawed, unembellished version. I think I would. I would have forgiven his mistakes and his failures. I have committed enough of my own.

some battles aren’t worth fighting.

I am no longer just a girl on the train,