I have low self-esteem, but I express it the healthy way... by eating a box of Double-Stuff Oreos.

Doctor: Your right ovary has stopped producing eggs.
Miranda: Is it possible it's just on strike?

I can't go on anymore bad dates. I would rather be home alone than out with some guy who sells socks on the internet.

Everybody knows deep down that life is as much about the things that do not happen as the things that do and that's not something that ought to be glossed over or denied because without frustration there would hardly be any need to daydream. And daydreams return me to my original sense of things and I luxuriate in these fervid primary visions until I am entirely my unalloyed self again. So even though it sometimes feels as if one could just about die from disappointment I must concede that in fact in a rather perverse way it is precisely those things I did not get that are keeping me alive.

I don't have Steve. There is no having the Steve.

Motherhood is the only thing in my life that I've really known for sure is something I wanted to do.