I put in so much for this sport, and it kind of stinks to see your teammates lose every match. I just put everything behind me.

He was kind of high, and I think I just grabbed his leg. I high-legged him over and he didn't really know what hit him.

What can you do? But it kind of [stinks] that was the first hit. But what can you do? It's part of the game. God didn't want me to have a no-hitter today.

This match is about sport and I separate that completely from politics.

The problem wasn't with the city, the sport, my teammates or my coach, even though I blamed all of them at one time or another. The problem was with me. But I didn't realize it back then because I hadn't been told that there was a clinical reason -- social anxiety disorder -- for everything odd I was feeling, everything from the depression to the shyness. I didn't understand that some of the things that were holding me back were chemical.

If I miss anything about the sport, it's the camaraderie of old teammates.