I remember I could do - I did Bart Simpson once on the bus. I did, like, a really good Bart Simpson voice on the bus, obviously before I hit puberty. And everybody went, 'Whoa, that sounds just like Bart Simpson.'
Bill Hader
Related My closet is like Bart Simpson's. THE WEEKND Back in high school, I wrote a novel about a character named Bart Simpson. I thought it was a very u... MATT GROENING My standard comment is, 'If you don't want your kids to be like Bart Simpson, don't act ... MATT GROENING I'm Bart Simpson, who the Hell are you? NANCY CARTWRIGHT This is a Bart Simpson Congress: underachievers and proud of it. RICHARD GEPHARDT There is a whole group of young people now with attitude and sharpness that comes from a Bart Simpso... WALTER ISAACSON Bart [Simpson] gets away with doing the things we all wish we could get away with. HANK AZARIA Jesus Christ would be quite interesting, but Bart Simpson would be brilliant. STEVE HARMISON Since September 11, security has been increased everywhere, and we have new IDs to get on to the Fox... NANCY CARTWRIGHT Aye, well, I've got my garden. LIKE I I told my Nike representative, 'Why didn't you guys use me for this?''' Williams said, laughing. LIKE I On the interception, I was out of bounds, LIKE I casually made his 'abort black fetuses' argument. LIKE I I can field my position. If I start worrying about being ready for a line drive too soon that means ... LIKE I I told him that he played a great game,'' said Falcons quarterback Michael Vick , who like Manning w... LIKE I I was so concerned with getting the ball out of my hands and not taking the sack, that sometimes I t... LIKE I I knew I had to throw the ball better,'' Manning said of his poor start. LIKE I I think the reason that I have that title or that moniker is because people don't know what to expec... LIKE I You're either ready and prepared to take on the task, or you're not,'' he said. LIKE I I did not have one butterfly out there today,'' he said. LIKE I Married to the Mob. LIKE I Hello you're with Drudge. LIKE I I don't expect Christian Fundamentalists to reach out to me. They are adamant that homosexuals are i... LIKE I throw enough shit at the wall and some should stick? LIKE I I'm not happy, that's all I can say about it,'' he said. LIKE I I don't use the voice of Bart when I'm making love to my husband, but Marge's voice turn... NANCY CARTWRIGHT I love Jessica Simpson. I love her voice. She's amazing. BRITNEY SPEARS I just totally do not believe in this sort of Bart Simpson character who infects so much of our lite... DAVID SMALL Coach Simpson did that when I played and it worked out pretty well, so I'm carrying on the tradition... BRAD NEHER I don't use the voice of Bart when I'm making love to my husband, but Marge's voice turns him on a l... NANCY CARTWRIGHT What I'd like is to turn out like Jessica Simpson, with her whole brand. NICOLE POLIZZI Bart had a really good game and played a part in every goal. I was really proud for him. MITCH MOORE I don't like asking for an autograph, but I would like to take a picture with Jessica Simpson be... ASHLEY TISDALE If I were actually Homer Simpson, I'd be getting scripts out the wazoo. DAN CASTELLANETA She [Simpson] did great. I didn't know it was her first film till after the first take. She was so c... JESSICA SIMPSON I bemoan the fact that all my famous friends have places in St. Bart's and I have to go to Monta... RUFUS WAINWRIGHT Homer: [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the on... HOMER SIMPSON Bart Swain just told me. ERIC WEDGE I'm still angry with Simpson for getting by with two murders. VINCENT BUGLIOSI Bart The Bear was fantastic to work with. Absolutely brilliant and so, so good. The things that that... GWENDOLINE CHRISTIE I hope I didn't brain my damage... - Homer Simpson SIMPSONS I do not like people touching my underwear. That's just weird! I travel with a washer and dryer,... CARRIE UNDERWOOD I loved my job... then the Simpson case happened. MARCIA CLARK I went to Bali, and I was in a small village, and somebody who was with me showed a woman a little f... MATT GROENING I was watching Ashlee Simpson on Jay's show last night... She was really singing, and I was saying, ... BILL MAHER All I have to say is: Jessica Simpson is the most beautiful woman on the planet! JESSICA SIMPSON Former Sen. Alan Simpson of Wyoming, the co-author of the 1986 Simpson-Mazzoli immigration reform bi... LAWRENCE KUDLOW I remember once acting really cool on a bus with this girl named Stephanie. When I got home, I reali... JOHN CUSACK Directing your first film is like showing up to the field trip in seventh grade, getting on the bus,... MIKE BIRBIGLIA Dallas Simpson came off the bench and played well, as did Austin Tucker. BRAD STAMPS I watched the entire O.J. Simpson trial, and he was guilty. CONNIE WILLIS I cannot believe that I get a tour bus. I've been traveling in a van for 15 years. I used to loo... RACHEL PLATTEN Pork is not a verb BART SIMPSON I am not delightfully saucy BART SIMPSON I am not a dentist BART SIMPSON I am not the last Don BART SIMPSON I am not licensed to do anything BART SIMPSON I am not a licensed hairstylist BART SIMPSON I think it's ironic that for once dad's butt prevented the release of toxic gas. BART SIMPSON I will not send lard through the mail BART SIMPSON My butt does not deserve a website BART SIMPSON I will not fake seizures BART SIMPSON Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ. BART SIMPSON Rudolph's red nose is not alcohol-related BART SIMPSON There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the boogeyman ... BART SIMPSON Dear God. We paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing. BART SIMPSON Hi, I'm looking for Amanda... Amanda Hug N Kiss. BART SIMPSON I never thought it was humanly possible, but this both sucks and blows. BART SIMPSON Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze? BART SIMPSON Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. BART SIMPSON You kill 'em, we grill 'em! BART SIMPSON I'd go with Satan himself! BART SIMPSON A burp is not an answer BART SIMPSON Nerve gas is not a toy BART SIMPSON Teacher is not a leper BART SIMPSON I did not win the Nobel Fart Prize BART SIMPSON Tar is not a plaything BART SIMPSON I no longer want my MTV BART SIMPSON Well, you're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't. BART SIMPSON I will not do anything bad ever again BART SIMPSON I will not bring sheep to class BART SIMPSON Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like love DAN CASTELLANETA Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love! HOMER SIMPSON Race was thick in the O.J. Simpson case from the very beginning, but it wasn't evident. And I th... MICHAEL ERIC DYSON I love talking to interesting people - people like O.J. Simpson, Andretti... I love champions. A cha... KIRK DOUGLAS I think Bart is writing about his personal journey, about legitimate things that bother him. DARRELL BOCK I'd really like to get on a Greyhound bus and go backpacking across America. DAVID MORRISSEY Being 15, I feel like people want me to go down the Justin Bieber, Cody Simpson sort of genre. SHAWN MENDES Romney said that his tax reform proposal is 'very similar to the Simpson-Bowles plan.' How I... ERSKINE BOWLES Bart, stop pestering Satan! MARGE SIMPSON The thing I think about when I think about Bart is perseverance. With Bart, hard work has never been... JAMES MOODY Bart! With ten thousand dollars, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like... SIMPSONS I love to shop at Macy's. It has a huge Guess section and lots of Jessica Simpson stuff. JACKIE EVANCHO I try and teach the game just as coach Simpson did. We use his techniques every single day. Many of ... BRAD NEHER I could be a yoga instructor. I'm not certified, but I could do it. Once I did a class where the... NINA DOBREV I remember once acting really cool on a bus with this girl named Stephanie. When I got home, I reali... JOHN CUSACK I am not a BART regular but have taken it probably five times to and from the city with some of my t... STEPHEN CURRY 'Bart Bucks' are not legal tender NANCY CARTWRIGHT I want nothing to do with O.J. Simpson. I want that name so far behind me, I want it out of my life. FAYE RESNICK In England especially, I've found that if you bring up King Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson at a ... MADONNA CICCONE
More Bill Hader
I remember being unbelievable bummed when 'Freaks and Geeks' was canceled. BILL HADER Voices are a good way to get in and out of things. James Carville constantly calls my wife to say I&... BILL HADER For our anniversary, my wife and I went to see Godzilla, and then we ate at Barnyard Venice, and it ... BILL HADER I've never met Charlie Sheen. BILL HADER I saw 'A Clockwork Orange' when I was 11. When you watch 'Clockwork Orange' at 11, i... BILL HADER Jason Sudeikis is always chewing gum. BILL HADER I just did this movie with Kristin Wiig called 'The Skeleton Twins.' That's a straight d... BILL HADER I set the time on my iPhone to be 30 minutes late, so I'm only an hour and a half late to appoin... BILL HADER My wife and I were on our honeymoon in Turks and Caicos, in the middle of nowhere, and I'm sitti... BILL HADER To be totally honest? I don't know if I'll keep doing more impressions. People told me I had... 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BILL GATES The best teacher is very interactive. BILL GATES Technology is unlocking the innate compassion we have for our fellow human beings. BILL GATES The tablet is not mainstream. Reading off the screen is not mainstream. BILL GATES Whether it's Google or Apple or free software, we've got some fantastic competitors and it k... BILL GATES I'm a geek. BILL GATES I know there's a farmer out there somewhere who never wants a PC and that's fine with me. BILL GATES If you go back to 1800, everybody was poor. I mean everybody. The Industrial Revolution kicked in, a... BILL GATES Go empower yourself. You need confidence because the one thing that bullying does is it belittles yo... BILL GOLDBERG As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others. BILL GATES Paper is no longer a big part of my day. I get 90% of my news online, and when I go to a meeting and... BILL GATES Treatment without prevention is simply unsustainable. BILL GATES If you can't make it good, at least make it look good. BILL GATES Discrimination has a lot of layers that make it tough for minorities to get a leg up. BILL GATES We all need people who will give us feedback. That's how we improve. BILL GATES In the old generation, if one kid bought a PlayStation 2 and the other kid bought an Xbox, at his ho... BILL GATES The U.S. immigration laws are bad - really, really bad. I'd say treatment of immigrants is one o... BILL GATES This is a fantastic time to be entering the business world, because business is going to change more... BILL GATES The worst pandemic in modern history was the Spanish flu of 1918, which killed tens of millions of p... BILL GATES Expectations are a form of first-class truth: If people believe it, it's true. BILL GATES Nobody spends any money on smallpox unless they worry about a bio-terrorist recreating it. BILL GATES For a highly motivated learner, it's not like knowledge is secret and somehow the Internet made ... BILL GATES In business, the idea of measuring what you are doing, picking the measurements that count like cust... BILL GATES Nuclear energy, in terms of an overall safety record, is better than other energy. BILL GATES People always fear change. People feared electricity when it was invented, didn't they? People f... BILL GATES By improving health, empowering women, population growth comes down. BILL GATES Innovation is moving at a scarily fast pace. BILL GATES Microsoft is not about greed. It's about innovation and fairness. BILL GATES I believe that if you show people the problems and you show them the solutions they will be moved to... BILL GATES Capitalism has worked very well. Anyone who wants to move to North Korea is welcome. BILL GATES Today a minimum wage earner has to work a day and a half just to pay for a full tank of gas. That is... BILL PASCRELL I had always thought that once you grew up you could do anything you wanted - stay up all night or e... BILL BRYSON Under many current state laws, minors who have been victims of trafficking are charged as criminals ... BILL FLORES Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing. BILL COSBY I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor? BILL WATTERSON There's a lot of things I believe in this world. I believe in God, I believe in the United State... BILL ENGVALL People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what&... BILL COSBY If you watch kids looking at something on television, even something that's produced for them an... BILL COSBY I'm not going out and hitting a 95-mph fastball where I can't see the stitches. I'm not ... BILL COSBY There are two sides to every story, and sometimes three, four, and five. BILL COSBY When I say, I don't care what white people think, I mean that. BILL COSBY If you speak your mind and if it is true what you're saying, then I think the integrity of what ... BILL COSBY Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it. BILL COSBY Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituari... BILL COSBY Sometimes you try to help people, and it backfires on you, and then they try to take advantage of yo... BILL COSBY Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. BILL COSBY Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: e... BILL COSBY Gray hair is God's graffiti. BILL COSBY A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. BILL COSBY If you took your child to the dentist and check for cavities, the child likely won't get them. I... BILL COSBY By the 1960s, many of us believed that the Civil Rights Movement could eliminate racism in America d... BILL COSBY The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now. BILL COSBY Anytime I get down to Miami, it's a wonderful thing. BILL GOLDBERG I have realized over time that I missed the mark with HyperCard. I grew up in a box-centric culture ... BILL ATKINSON As a father, you want the best for your son, quite obviously. You want to create the best memories f... BILL GOLDBERG Movie acting suits me because I only need to be good for ninety seconds at a time. BILL MURRAY If you're so pro-life, do me a favour: don't lock arms and block medical clinics. If you'... BILL HICKS I was in NYC during 9/11; it happened on a Tuesday, I was on stage Thursday. It was a small crowd, b... BILL BURR There are more people dying of malaria than any specific cancer. BILL GATES The man who rows the boat seldom has time to rock it. BILL COPELAND I can't negate the theory that the Huxtables on 'The Cosby Show' may have helped pave th... BILL COSBY A buddy will keep you honest and add a dimension of fun to your workout. BILL TOOMEY Someday, somehow, the leadership of Planned Parenthood will have to answer for their callous disrega... BILL FLORES One of my gripes about movies is that people take them so seriously, and the moneymaking aspects are... BILL MURRAY Words are the children of reason and, therefore, can't explain it. They really can't transla... BILL EVANS I bugged my mom and dad to 'get me inside the television set' when I was about four years ol... BILL MUMY I just became one with my browser software. BILL GRIFFITH No matter how much you've won, no matter how many games, no matter how many championships, no ma... BILL PARCELLS I don't think there's a... boundary between digital media and print media. Every magazine is... BILL GATES People in the West like to shoot things. When they first got to the West they shot buffalo. Once the... BILL BRYSON The Clinton White House today said they would start to give national security and intelligence brief... BILL MAHER William Andrews Clark was caught in a bribery scandal during a campaign for the U.S. Senate - he was... BILL DEDMAN The International Brigades and the British volunteers were, numerically, only a small part of the Re... BILL ALEXANDER The anger in the Brigade against those who fought the Republic in the rear was sharpened by reports ... BILL ALEXANDER Being a broadcaster encompasses the business of sport, which is my life today, and it encompasses th... BILL WALTON Chick Hearn was my favorite broadcaster ever - he's the one who taught me to think basketball, h... BILL WALTON The great thing about being a broadcaster is you have this incredible responsibility to the people t... BILL WALTON Good writing is clear thinking made visible. BILL WHEELER If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I'll bet they'd live a lot differently. BILL WATTERSON Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend. BILL WATTERSON I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood. BILL WATTERSON We don't devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. BILL WATTERSON I just read this great science fiction story. It's about how machines take control of humans and tur... BILL WATTERSON Enemy fighters at two o'clock!Roger. What should I do until then? BILL WATTERSON Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. BILL WATTERSON From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way. BILL WATTERSON Black holes are where God divided by zero. BILL WATTERSON The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the
universe is that it has never tried ... BILL WATTERSON We use the people who are in the bullpen producing. BILL EVANS After every massacre in a school, Americans grasp at quick cures. 'Let's install metal detec... BILL DEDMAN There's no magic line between an application and an operating system that some bureaucrat in Was... BILL GATES The long view of the Census bureau allows some changes that are taken for granted to be studied in m... BILL DEDMAN In the Woodstock movie, you see Justin, my son, who is now a filmmaker, being carried off by my wife... BILL KREUTZMANN The malaria parasite has been killing children and sapping the strength of whole populations for ten... BILL GATES Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all th... BILL WATTERSON I have an addiction to caffeine. BILL AYERS Microsoft Research has a thing called the Sense Cam that, as you walk around, it's taking photos... BILL GATES Probably the single most important evolutionary trait dogs developed was right there at the outset, ... BILL BUFORD Awards are meaningless to me, and I have nothing but disdain for anyone who actively campaigns to ge... BILL MURRAY Ask any successful person to look back over the events of his or her life, and chances are there'... BILL RANCIC A city built on rivers and bituminous coal, Pittsburgh in the '90s has survived the boom and bus... BILL DEDMAN You know those adages about smelling the roses and chasing butterflies? The markets are my butterfli... BILL GROSS Many visitors to Chicago know the Loop, the shops on the Magnificent Mile, and the Museum Campus. Me... BILL DEDMAN