I think you’re confused as to the nature of our relationship. You and I, we don’t get along. You’re a psychopathic control freak. You order me around and I want to kill you. I’m a pigheaded insubordinate ass. I drive you mad and you want to strangle me.

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Ilona Andrews

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"Yes", Saiman said. "And now he is demolishing the Ma...
ILONA ANDREWS Saiman reached into the trunk and pulled out a pink tulle tutu.
“No.”
“Yes.” ILONA ANDREWS I take back what I said about the donkey,’’ Ascanio said. ‘’She’s awesome
ILONA ANDREWS You can’t blame me,” Ascanio said. “Anybody in my place would be concerned. You don’t even h...
ILONA ANDREWS Ascanio..."
"Yes, Consort?"
"I think you misunderstand the whole nature of what it means t...
ILONA ANDREWS I've been assigned to bodyguard you."
You've got to be kidding me.
Derek snorted. ILONA ANDREWS swore. “Barabas said you might say that. I’m supposed to tell you this.” Ascanio cleared his t...
ILONA ANDREWS Because that's what it would catch in the wild, a boar, right? I can't wait to see a pack of bunnyca...
ILONA ANDREWS Sit your ass down, Don Juanabe," Derek said.
"Don Juanabe?" Ascanio pulled out his swords.
ILONA ANDREWS Okay, pull me up."
The rope didn't move.
"Ascanio?" What was it now? Did he see a butterfl...
ILONA ANDREWS Say 'pop.'"
"Pop?"
"That was the sound of me pulling your head out of your ass.
ILONA ANDREWS And how did your day go?" I asked Ascanio.
He turned to me, a dreamy look on his pretty face....
ILONA ANDREWS Quick, Derek, it's your chance to shine," Ascanio said.
Derek gave him a withering look.
"...
ILONA ANDREWS Desandra shrugged her shoulders. "Hey, Kate? Have you thought of walking up to Hugh and telling him ...
ILONA ANDREWS Put your badass faces on and follow me.
ILONA ANDREWS Her face looked like it would shatter any second.
ILONA ANDREWS One day I'll kill him, you know.
I glanced at her. She was deadly serious.
ILONA ANDREWS Andrea raised her eyebrows. "Look at you, all high-speed."
"Yeah, you'd think I was a detective...
ILONA ANDREWS She put her hands over her face. Ah crap. What do I do now? Do I say something, do I not say somethi...
ILONA ANDREWS Andrea, in less than twelve hours, Atlanta will be full of demons. They will kill, feed, and release...
ILONA ANDREWS Are you happy?
When I can get out of my own way.
And the rest of the time?
The rest o...
ILONA ANDREWS It's not a loup cage, you know,' I told her. 'It's a holding cell. Or safe room. or secure room. I d...
ILONA ANDREWS Who is there with you?"

"Raphael"

Kate's voice snapped. "I'll be in Atlanta in...
ILONA ANDREWS Derek, you just don't say things like that to a woman. Keep going this way and you'll spend your lif...
ILONA ANDREWS We can do subtle," I assured her.
"It's our middle name," Andrea added.
For some odd reaso...
ILONA ANDREWS He glued the chair to my ass."
Silence.
"Is it still...attached?"
"I can't get it off...
ILONA ANDREWS Who is Hunter Becker?"
"Becker the Gory? Lighthouse Keepers? Boston?"
"I would've preferre...
ILONA ANDREWS We don't need teenage bouda sex fiends as interns.
How do you know he is a sex fiend?
He i...
ILONA ANDREWS Would you like to work here with me?
We have no clients and the pay is shit.
ILONA ANDREWS Aha," Andrea said. "I'm going to ignore that you just referred to yourself as 'sugar woogums'.
ILONA ANDREWS What do you mean fainted?
Took a dive, kissed the pavement. Swooned like a southern belle after...
ILONA ANDREWS I got a dog-training book. It says Grendel needs mental stimulation, so I tried to train him, but I ...
ILONA ANDREWS Are you sure you know where you're going?" Andrea frowned.
"Would you like me to pull over and ...
ILONA ANDREWS It’s your duty as my best friend to be outraged with me.”
“I’m outraged!” I snarled....
ILONA ANDREWS I have a serious question."

"I will give a serious answer."

"Can a god be kill...
ILONA ANDREWS I batted my eyelashes and did my best to appear dumb as a board
ILONA ANDREWS The dark scary servant of all evil was on his way to rescue me. Somehow that thought failed to make ...
ILONA ANDREWS Your favorite volhv showed up half an hour ago, complaining about his lack of sleep and stupid gods....
ILONA ANDREWS Some people had attack dogs. Ghastek had attack lawyers.
ILONA ANDREWS The door swung open and Kate walked in. Her jeans and T-shirt were splattered with blood and she was...
ILONA ANDREWS My mind struggled to formulate a coherent though, any thought. I opened my mouth. "Your pajamas have...
ILONA ANDREWS Only poor people are weird. Rich people are eccentric.
ILONA ANDREWS I was so happy to be out of there. “Barabas, if you weren’t batting
for the other team, I�...
ILONA ANDREWS I gave him my Order smile: sweet grin, hard eyes, reached over to my passenger seat, and pulled out ...
ILONA ANDREWS You think this is some sort of comedy going on here?” Collins gave him his tough stare.
A lit...
ILONA ANDREWS Bad days, good days, ‘I’ll cut you if you look at me the wrong way’ days. I’ll take them all...
ILONA ANDREWS You’re touching me,” I chided him.
He caressed my back, sliding his hand down, hitting eve...
ILONA ANDREWS Raphael turned me over and looked at me, his face close to mine. "You and I will never be done.You'r...
ILONA ANDREWS Are you implying that our relationship is like a Spanish soap opera?”

“I’m not imp...
ILONA ANDREWS Kate stood by the door with her arms crossed.
That was an anti-Curran pose. What the hell was t...
ILONA ANDREWS Someone pounded on the office door. Barabas moved to the door, slid aside the metal shutter covering...
ILONA ANDREWS My tablecloth was missing in action and long, jagged scratches covered the table's surface.The scrat...
ILONA ANDREWS Since we’re playing that game… I tilted my face up to his and gave him a lovesick gaze.
“...
ILONA ANDREWS The rage of the Beast Lord was a terrible thing to behold. Some people stormed, some punched things,...
ILONA ANDREWS At first glance you looked at Kate and thought “fighter,” maybe merc. Five inches taller than me...
ILONA ANDREWS Curran and Kate stood by the door.
“I can’t believe you decided to come down here and check...
ILONA ANDREWS You’re the most experienced investigator I’ve got who’s not tied up in something, and I can’...
ILONA ANDREWS Kate smirked.
"What?"
"Your horse looks pink."
"So?"
"If you paste some stars on...
ILONA ANDREWS It’s never a good thing when the black volhv says “Uh-oh” and then runs for his life.
ILONA ANDREWS Our standard rate. A doubloon a day."
It was generous. More than generous--some families would ...
ILONA ANDREWS So, regarding that tidbit about your having a fertile imagination when it comes to private activitie...
ILONA ANDREWS Rumors said that if he got drunk enough, he sometimes got his jollies by stripping naked and scaring...
ILONA ANDREWS The decorator of Las Colimas must have been a great admirer of both early Aztec and late Taco Bell a...
ILONA ANDREWS Fuck the pack. I gave them fifteen years of my life. I fought for them, bled for them, and the momen...
ILONA ANDREWS Because he has the best equipment in the City and he knows how to use it!
ILONA ANDREWS I'm welding the bimbo room shut.
ILONA ANDREWS Was his body made out of orange rocks and did he at any point yell 'It's clobbering time'?"
"I ...
ILONA ANDREWS You should name him Fezzik."
"Inconceivable.
ILONA ANDREWS

I think you’re confused as to the nature of our relationship. You and I, we don’t get along. You’re a psychopathic control freak. You order me around and I want to kill you. I’m a pigheaded insubordinate ass. I drive you mad and you want to strangle me.

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Ilona Andrews

I think you’re confused as to the nature of our relationship. You and I, we don’t get along. You’re a psychopathic control freak. You order me around and I want to kill you. I’m a pigheaded insubordinate ass. I drive you mad and you want to strangle me.

Ilona Andrews

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