I'm not freakishly short. I had, on my show, used shortness as a joke subject; it didn't really bother me.

The brain process that results in a joke materializing where no joke was before remains a mystery. I'm not aware of any scholarly, scientific or neurological studies on the subject.

A biggest mistake I made when I started doing a talk show was I thought you had to read the books.

The very phrase 'Oscar night' used to accelerate my pulse. For one thing - dating myself - it meant Bob Hope. He always had good, strong jokes, that faultless delivery, and always a new joke about his own films' failure - once again - to be honored.

History is not reassuring on the subject of the longevity of seemingly lasting great nations, is it?

Unpleasant reading on the subject of anger tells us that there's not really anything wrong with it. In limited amounts. It can even be a good thing. A pressure valve.