Fred Armisen quote: "I've always been a fan of instructional videos. The bass-player ones are insane. The music on them is fascinating. It's not something you hear on CDs or would really ever play in bands. You listen to it and are like, 'What is happening?' It's this blizzard of notes in weird time signatures, and they're trying to teach you that."

At 'SNL' there's framed pictures of all the cast members, and it starts with Dan Aykroyd...
FRED ARMISEN

I know I'm going to be happy way later in the future, knowing that's the way I conducted myself.
FRED ARMISEN

When I was growing up, records meant everything to me,
FRED ARMISEN

I think it comes off better on stage.
FRED ARMISEN

like an aging Pete Townshend kind of guy.
FRED ARMISEN

It was like, here comes a joke. Here's the joke. I just told a joke!
FRED ARMISEN

Chalkboards being used inside the restaurant seem to be a good sign that the proprietors are proud o...
FRED ARMISEN

When I first started going to Portland, people told me about Stumptown. They were like 'Oh, it&#...
FRED ARMISEN

I have an inability to relax. I try to make every day a work day. I get pleasure from work... I try ...
FRED ARMISEN

My father came from Germany. My mom came from Venezuela. My father's culturally German, but his ...
FRED ARMISEN

I try to maintain a high level of coolness. Which means I've gotta look at lot of magazines. I&#...
FRED ARMISEN

The day of parts of the country hating each other, or rivalries like that... I feel like that's ...
FRED ARMISEN

When people say that L.A. doesn't have a culture, I think it really does: a very old culture, an...
FRED ARMISEN

I enjoy getting to work on 'Saturday Night Live', where I get to do people like David Paters...
FRED ARMISEN

There's something really easy and just somehow un-crowded about the Portland airport. Every time...
FRED ARMISEN

We're going to fight racism not with racism, but we're going to fight with solidarity. We sa...
FRED HAMPTON

I would suggest maintaining a life and a career outside the Industry. This is a fickle business and ...
FRED SAVAGE

I am the people, I'm not the pig. You got to make a distinction. And the people are going to hav...
FRED HAMPTON

Investing in management means building communication systems, business processes, feedback, and rout...
FRED WILSON

For those broadcasters who are less than responsible, the FCC needs to have sharper teeth to enforce...
FRED UPTON

One of the first shows I ever did was 'Laverne & Shirley.' I played this sleazy guy that...
FRED WILLARD

I can say I won a Senior British Open at Turnberry. I think that's the best thing about it, the ...
FRED COUPLES

Ethereum has taken what was a four-function calculator of a programming language in Bitcoin and turn...
FRED EHRSAM

You really have to understand this isn't a business where you sit in the back room and do calcul...
FRED DELUCA

I'd love to have Burt Reynolds' career.
FRED WILLARD

I left home at 17, traveled. I got married when I was 21. That's a young age. As it turned out, ...
FRED COUPLES

I always loved comedy growing up - Bob Hope, Red Skelton and Danny Kaye.
FRED WILLARD

I loved Bob Hope and the way he would turn to the camera and break the fourth wall.
FRED WILLARD

The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap - a...
FRED FRIENDLY

Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it.
FRED HOYLE

There is a coherent plan to the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
FRED HOYLE

Space isn't remote at all. It's only an hour's drive away if your car could go straight upwards.
FRED HOYLE

I think my wife saw a picture of the rock group Journey, and they're kind of aging, and the one ...
FRED WILLARD

It seems like such a terrible shame that innocent civilians have to get hurt in wars, otherwise comb...
FRED WOODWORTH

New York's niche is content, and content is becoming more valuable. Just think about what is mor...
FRED WILSON

I was really upset because I was branded as an enemy alien when I'm an American.
FRED KOREMATSU

You have to realize that the customer really is king. People who go into more established businesses...
FRED DELUCA

Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark?
FRED STOLLER

Government is an unnecessary evil. Human beings, when accustomed to taking responsibility for their ...
FRED WOODWORTH

We're going to see a lot more young people entering entrepreneurial ventures.
FRED MALEK

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.
FRED ALLEN

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year.
FRED ALLEN

Where were you fellows when the paper was blank?
FRED ALLEN

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better.
FRED ALLEN

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about t...
FRED ALLEN

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.
FRED ALLEN

All television is children's television.
FRED ALLEN

If you took all the sincerity in Hollywood and put it in the navel of a fruit fly, you'd still have ...
FRED ALLEN

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
FRED ALLEN

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
FRED ALLEN

When you get through all the phony tinsel of Hollywood, you find the genuine tinsel underneath.
FRED ALLEN

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but as a group decide nothing can ...
FRED ALLEN

Part of the problem with the word 'disabilities' is that it immediately suggests an inability to see...
FRED ROGERS

When I say it's you I like, I'm talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than...
FRED ROGERS

The very best reason parents are so special . . . is because we are the holders of a priceless gift,...
FRED ROGERS

When you're prepared, you're more confident. When you have a strategy, you're more comfortable.
FRED COUPLES

I'm like a duck: calm above the water, and paddling like hell underneath.
FRED SHERO

I just put my feet in the air and move them around.
FRED ASTAIRE

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.
FRED ASTAIRE

Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.
FRED ASTAIRE

Happiness is a positive cash flow.
FRED ADLER

A man who is contented with what he has done will never become famous for what he will do.
FRED ESTABROOK

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission.
FRED ALLEN

Boxing purists, quite naturally, question Tyson's appetite for victory. Mills Lane should have stopp...
FRED MITCHELL

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to...
FRED ALLEN

I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity... I don't want to look like a little old man d...
FRED ASTAIRE

The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of the...
FRED ASTAIRE

Dancing is a sweat job.
FRED ASTAIRE

Chance is the fool's name for Fate
FRED ASTAIRE

I am bit sending messages with my feet. All I ever wanted was not to come up empty. I did it for the...
FRED ASTAIRE

I'm just a hoofer with a spare set of tails
FRED ASTAIRE

Disco is just jitterbug.
FRED ASTAIRE

I am bit sending messages with my feet. All I ever wanted was not to come up empty. I did it for th...
FRED ASTAIRE

This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes t...
FRED ASTAIRE

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.
FRED ASTAIRE

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
FRED ALLEN

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses ...
FRED ALLEN

Anyone who does anything to help a child in his life is a hero to me.
FRED ROGERS

[Television is] the triumph of machine over people.
FRED ALLEN

Television is a new medium. It's called a medium because nothing is well-done.
FRED ALLEN

Committee--a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be ...
FRED ALLEN

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to...
FRED ALLEN

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. Whe...
FRED ROGERS

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room ...
FRED ALLEN

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.
FRED ALLEN

After two years in Washington, I often long for the realism and sincerity of Hollywood.
FRED THOMPSON

I suspect that writer's block afflicts mainly people who have some stable and ample source of in...
FRED SABERHAGEN

Given the slow pace of Washington's bureaucracy, policymakers are often busy solving yesterday&#...
FRED UPTON

The kind of audience that watches 'Matlock' is ideal for a lead-in to the affiliates' ne...
FRED SILVERMAN

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.
FRED ALLEN

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
FRED ALLEN

There are aspects of Asian culture in my work, but it's really rooted in an American experience ...
FRED TOMASELLI

I didn't think that the government would go as far as to include American citizens to be interne...
FRED KOREMATSU

I was an American citizen, and I had as many rights as anyone else.
FRED KOREMATSU

As long as my record stands in federal court, any American citizen can be held in prison or concentr...
FRED KOREMATSU

My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.
FRED ALLEN

I am tolerably ignorant about Judaism, and much of what I do know about it seems hard to swallow, be...
FRED MELAMED

Comedy always came easier for me. But I would have loved to have been an action hero.
FRED WILLARD

It scared me to death to think about improv, but I got hired for a year at Second City in Chicago, w...
FRED WILLARD

When you think about accountants, who would want to be an accountant? But, what would we do without ...
FRED WILLARD

You know, you don't have to look like everybody else to be acceptable and to feel acceptable.
FRED ROGERS

Tactics, fitness, stroke ability, adaptability, experience, and sportsmanship are all necessary for ...
FRED PERRY

Before the war, my parents were very proud people. They'd always talk about Japan and also about...
FRED KOREMATSU

New discoveries and production of resources like shale oil and gas are dramatically altering our ene...
FRED UPTON

Everything would be alright if everything was put back in the hands of the people, and we're goi...
FRED HAMPTON

Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is se...
FRED ROGERS

Sometimes you have to, as I say, build bridges where you can - but draw lines where you must.
FRED THOMPSON

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that h...
FRED ALLEN

An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
FRED ALLEN

If human beings are fundamentally good, no government is necessary; if they are fundamentally bad, a...
FRED WOODWORTH

The problem is that agencies sometimes lose sight of common sense as they create regulations.
FRED THOMPSON

Profit or perish... There are only two ways to make money: increase sales and decrease costs.
FRED DELUCA

I was the King of Twinkie-Vision one day, the King of Jiggle TV the next, thanks to Farrah Fawcett a...
FRED SILVERMAN

You can't build a revolution with no education. Jomo Kenyatta did this in Africa, and because th...
FRED HAMPTON

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.
FRED ALLEN

Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be...
FRED ALLEN

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive allianc...
FRED ALLEN

An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
FRED ALLEN

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
FRED ALLEN

Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
FRED ALLEN

A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.
FRED ALLEN

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
FRED ALLEN

The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.
FRED ALLEN

The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi.
FRED ALLEN

Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday an...
FRED ALLEN

A conference is a gathering of people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothin...
FRED ALLEN

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and ...
FRED ALLEN

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is abo...
FRED ALLEN

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.
FRED ALLEN

A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark g...
FRED ALLEN

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back...
FRED ALLEN

I know the exploding cost of health care is at the root of our long-term fiscal challenges.
FRED UPTON

Martin Landau in 'Crimes and Misdemeanors' - he gave me chills.
FRED WILLARD

We say primarily that the priority of this struggle is class. That Marx and Lenin and Che Guevara an...
FRED HAMPTON

I think Kellie Martin, Reese Witherspoon and Claire Danes represent the future for women in film, an...
FRED SAVAGE

In the end, we may be hurting the very people we should be concerned about - the inner-city poor, th...
FRED THOMPSON

Cleveland is my hometown, and the Indians have a narrow but rich history.
FRED WILLARD

Someone I've always admired is Catherine O'Hara... I think she's one of the best actress...
FRED WILLARD

Venture capital is about capturing the value between the startup phase and the public company phase.
FRED WILSON

I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity... I don't want to look like a little o...
FRED ASTAIRE

Our work on light bulbs wasn't an arbitrary mandate. We didn't just pick a standard out of t...
FRED UPTON

What's been important in my understanding of myself and others is the fact that each one of us is so...
FRED ROGERS

When the Bitcoin white paper emerged in 2008, it was completely revolutionary. The amount of concept...
FRED EHRSAM

People far too often associate derivatives markets with mere speculation, but there are very legitim...
FRED EHRSAM

An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
FRED ALLEN

When I see people laughing at ideas and companies we have backed, I smile. It means we are going to ...
FRED WILSON

Obama is a very fine writer with an excellent command of language. His memoir 'Dreams From My Fa...
FRED KAPLAN

I've never crossed over to be a big star. I'd like to be in a big $100 million movie, though...
FRED WILLARD

When you drill down, blockchains are really a shared version of reality everyone agrees on. So wheth...
FRED EHRSAM

One of the great things about young entrepreneurs is that they don't know that something can'...
FRED WILSON

But if the Chinese mainland, the PRC, attacked Taiwan, we'd be obligated to come to their aid.
FRED THOMPSON

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them a...
FRED ALLEN

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
FRED ALLEN

The venture business is a bit of an apprenticeship business, so the firm I worked for didn't let...
FRED WILSON

I am just so appreciative of God's love. It's higher than any mountain, wider than any ocean...
FRED HAMMOND

My career progressed slowly. Real slow at a time. The irony of it was I had the best part of my care...
FRED FUNK

And when we draw lines in the sand with regard to certain basic things that are vital to our interes...
FRED THOMPSON

Basic research is to work at the very edge, the very border of, of knowledge, and move that border f...
FRED KAVLI

All of them turned their backs on me at that time because they thought I was a troublemaker.
FRED KOREMATSU

Presidents with strong nerves are decisive. They don't balk at unpopular decisions. They are wil...
FRED BARNES

The comments I most appreciate come from ordinary readers who've happened on one of my books at ...
FRED SABERHAGEN

It's critical - that the people that are benefiting today from Medicare and Social Security that...
FRED UPTON

I really like dating stories, like in Betty and Veronica comics; I like David Lynch and H.P. Lovecra...
FRED SEIBERT

I think we can lower our emissions. I think the world will be better off if we did that, and we can ...
FRED UPTON

I was able to solve enough big problems along the way that the sheriff didn't come along and put...
FRED DELUCA

There seems to be a vulnerability at the networks in late night. They are losing more and more audie...
FRED SILVERMAN

How you handle the obstacles has a big impact on how you do. If you give up, then you obviously don&...
FRED DELUCA

We've got to face the fact that some people say you fight fire best with fire, but we say you put fi...
FRED HAMPTON

After quitting radio I was able to live on the money I saved on aspirins.
FRED ALLEN

In the external scheme of things, shining moments are as brief as the twinkling of an eye, yet such ...
FRED ROGERS

I like to compare the holiday season with the way a child listens to a favorite story. The pleasure ...
FRED ROGERS

I am an English major in school with an emphasis in creative writing. I think hearing Maya Angelou s...
FRED SAVAGE

I believe the mobile OS market will play out very similarly to Windows and Macintosh, with Android i...
FRED WILSON

I believe Android will be stronger in the developing world than it is in the developed world.
FRED WILSON

I do think that some bands seem to be dabbling in the rock-hip-hop world and are not necessarily ser...
FRED DURST

We need new medical approaches to preventing and/or curing disease. We need new scientific approache...
FRED WILSON

Given New York City's cultural diversity, it has always attracted creative people.
FRED WILSON

For the foreseeable future, I'm all about building blockchain-based decentralized services.
FRED EHRSAM

The self-driving car revolution was kicked off by The 'DARPA' Grand Challenge to make an aut...
FRED EHRSAM

Prague is a dark place.
FRED DURST

It's not about how much movement you do, how much interaction there is, it just reeks of credibi...
FRED DURST

In this play we're dealing with relative truths - who's lying, who's telling the truth. ...
FRED WARD

We ain't gonna fight no reactionary pigs who run up and down the street being reactionary; we...
FRED HAMPTON

The Internet had a core innovation that made it valuable: The ability to disseminate data over a dis...
FRED EHRSAM

When Wes came back to Limp Bizkit, we really wanted to do something different. We wanted to make a c...
FRED DURST

Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatica...
FRED ROGERS

The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap and ...
FRED FRIENDLY

A man who is contented with what he has done will never become famous for what he will do.
FRED ESTABROOK

Our goal for fiscal 1998 is to continue to reduce Apple's break-even point through a combination of ...
FRED ANDERSON

We feel very good about delivering solid profitability while reaching our goal of 4 weeks of channel...
FRED ANDERSON

There's no question average selling prices are dropping all over the marketplace,
FRED ANDERSON

It'll take most of the quarter to ramp up production of the iMac, and we're unlikely to be able meet...
FRED ANDERSON

Beautiful places, they were. They had porches in front, high ceilings in the apartments. You could w...
FRED ANDERSON

We remain focused on our primary goal of returning Apple to sustainable profitability,
FRED ANDERSON

very optimistic for the strong momentum we have.
FRED ANDERSON

In light of the lower results anticipated for the December quarter, we now expect revenue for fiscal...
FRED ANDERSON

And yet, despite its military defeat, the loss of its North American possessions, and the destructio...
FRED ANDERSON

We are also resetting our revenue target for fiscal year 2001 to the $7.5 to $8 billion range and ou...
FRED ANDERSON

There is a possibility that we will see some form of rationing with the conditions being as bad or w...
FRED ALLVINE

Few people I think fully comprehend the seriousness of the problem that the South and Southeast coul...
FRED ALLVINE

Fred Armisen

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