FastSaying

If it looks like shit, smells like shit, and feels like shit, you don't have to actually eat it to know it's shit.


Seth Eisenberg

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If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy... he'll know what to do with it.
DOUG HORTON Life, its so great, but when we act like shit and do shit, then it aint. Why should we act like that...
TUPAC SHAKUR I felt like shit, but it was happy shit.
LAURELL K. HAMILTON Life happens. Shit happens. And it happens a lot. To a lot of people.
COLLEEN HOOVER It's hard to really look at somebody and go: "Hey, maybe something nice will happen." You just don't...
LOUIS C.K. I don't like talking shit about men, men make a shit of themselves 
DEICY ZULEICA GONZALEZ And meanwhile time goes about its immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit. You go...
MARTIN AMIS You know, you're like a walking magnet for weird shit, Chase.
M.R. MERRICK Holy shit." Rehv shook his head and muttered, "Now we know what the zombie apocalypse looks like.
J.R. WARD Recovery feels like shit. It didn't feel like I was doing something good; it felt like I was giving ...
PORTIA DE ROSSI Life is like a box of chocolates, it mostly tastes like shit.
RUFUS RHODEN You're 16 years old, you don't know shit about shit, and PULL UP YOU'RE PANTS!!!
DENIS LEARY If you start to smell some of the shit, you start smelling all of the shit
DOUG STANHOPE Shit," Delia said. "I mean, shoot. No, actually, I mean shit. I really do.
SARAH DESSEN Too much tail. All that jewelry weighs it down. Like vanity. Can't nobody fly with all that shit. Wa...
TONI MORRISON I got so much tarter i dont gotta dip my fishsticks in shit!
MITCH HEDBERG I don't give a shit now, everything's been done. All that matters is you do it and you have a little...
MATTHEW BARBER the shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S
GWEN STEFANI Real recognize real and if you real ill speak to you and if i speak to you i fucks with you true shi...
JANEA BROWN Shit end of the stick
PROVERB Shit happens. Doesn't mean you have to step in it. But if you do I would buy a new pair of shoes.
KILBURN HALL Don’t shout my friend; no one gives you the shit unless you make them.
M.F. MOONZAJER He sees me through the glass. We both nod like we give a small shit about each other.
PETER HEDGES It wasn't fair, but what is? Life is a crap carnival with shit prizes.
STEPHEN KING oh shit it's shit
STEPHEN KING You look like shit." Honesty is important in any relationship.
GORDON ANDREWS I no longer have a problem!, I'm free from the lies, the bs, the games, the drama, the sneaky shit y...
JOZIE Shit is the tofu of cursing and can be molded to whichever condition the speaker desires. Hot as shi...
DAVID SEDARIS Just when I think you might have a soul, you say shit like that.
KODY KEPLINGER All it comes down to is this: I feel like shit but look great.
BRET EASTON ELLIS Writing it all down is like taking a good shit, if done right you probably feel empty afterwards.
SOLANGE NICOLE There is nothing like making love to somebody you give a shit about.
JIM CARREY And meanwhile time goes about its immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit.
MARTIN AMIS It’s like, how did Columbus discover America when the Indians were already here? What kind of shit...
MILES DAVIS Your shit is for you, my shit is for me - Understand?
DEYTH BANGER If they wanted their shit stirred, then stirred their shit was jolly well going to be.
STEPHEN CLARKE Would you like to work here with me?
We have no clients and the pay is shit.
ILONA ANDREWS That’s right you little fucktart, she thought. Time to eat shit and die.
BENJAMIN R. SMITH There are talking dogs all over the place, unbelievably boring they are, on and on and on about sex ...
URSULA K. LE GUIN When shit brings you down, just say 'fuck it', and eat yourself some motherfucking candy.
DAVID SEDARIS One of the problems with all of this is that not all narratives are equal. Imagine, to take a silly ...
DERRICK JENSEN You look like shit." Jason smiled, without opening his eyes.
"You sweet-talker.
LAURELL K. HAMILTON Holy shit," I breathed. "Hellhounds."
"Harry," Michael said sternly. "You know I hate it when y...
JIM BUTCHER They're treating us like animals, so lets shit on their floor!
DAVID WONG I dont wanna be a terrorist. I just wanna Blow shit Up!
ROZZU LOZ One’s own shit doesn’t smell
OLD RUSSIAN SAYING I can make an excuse. Damn, a 3 year old can make an excuse or I could just tell you I am a shit per...
AMIR BENDAALI But what's this sh*t you said about you like to cut your wrists too?I say that shit just clowning do...
EMINEM If it takes us 10 years to get into the shit, it will take us 20 to get out.

And the jour...
JASPER FFORDE Given the time that I had to complete the task...I think I did a shit job of it
UZAIR SHAFIQUE If shit was a currency, we would all be rich.
ARIEL KREZARIEN Bears shit in the woods.
EVANGELOS VENIZELOS When all is shit, become a fly.
JOSH HOLMAN Look. I was pissed off! That's all I could say. I really felt that I wanted to do that shit. At one ...
EMINEM Shit rolls downhill
PROVERB Shit on your whole mortifying, imaginary, and symbolic theater!
GILLES DELEUZE Shit floats to the top
PROVERB He must be a king.Why?He hasn't got shit all over him.
MONTY PYTHON Don't say something which isn't me... I am the Devil and I don't inspire of doing this shit!
DEYTH BANGER hoo-leee shite!
JOSEPH STATEN I wonder idly how long i can go without sleep before I flip my shit and start running down the stree...
LAUREN OLIVER A young English couple was visiting with me one summer after I had been composting humanure for abou...
JOSEPH JENKINS Spontaneously, without any theological training, I, a child, grasped the incompatibility of God and ...
MILAN KUNDERA I have a Rolex collection and a diamond collection. I'd like to find the biggest goddamn diamond I c...
MIKE DIRNT If you say shit happens, you have a weak sphincter.
PRABHUDOSS SAMUEL You should write about take no-shit women like me. Girls need to know they can break the rules" p.79
GLORIA STEINEM You never knew the last time you were seeing someone. You didn't know when the last argument happene...
J.R. WARD But honestly? What women need?” Dean paused to take a sip of his coffee. “Actions. Not words. So...
PRISCILLA GLENN You can't turn chicken shit into chicken salad but you can put chicken shit into someone's chicken s...
BLINK 182 MAGGOTS! I only shit with the money in my poverty and all who envy and steal this money in my povert...
MUCOR DEDALIV RALUI Some good shit happens fast (a bestselling book), and some good shit happens slow (love).
CAROLINE KEPNES If there is shit all around me, how can I eat my ice cream?
S. BALARAM I don't give a shit how it happened, the window is broken... Wait, why is there syrup everywhere? Ok...
JUSTIN HALPERN If your life is shit then that because you step on it.
J C A ROWE I know it's a crock of shit. I ain't offering you happily-ever-after. I'm offering you... happily-ma...
WALLY LAMB Artist Matthew Barney has made a film about “shit”. It is hardly original. Hollywood has made sh...
DEAN CAVANAGH If life gives you shit, just flush it away and spray the air clean.
THOMAS SANDERSON I mean, you can know someone is dying on an intellectual level, but emotionally it hasn't really hit...
JESSE ANDREWS You have a top lifestyle, but shit money!!
CHARLIE HARPER Good to know in times of war you can’t bluff for shit.
SAMANTHA YOUNG I'd use your opinion as an ass wipe;if i actually gave a shit.
BEN DOVER There are very few, very fuckin' few people, Kia, who get what's precious in this world. They work t...
KRISTEN ASHLEY Please and smell shit
SHANNY Butter yo shit.
HANNAH HART niggas ain't shit.
LIBIN SAID I don’t think God gives a shit if we have a dog or if a woman wears shorts. I think He gives a shit...
, AN ABUNDANCE OF KATHERINES, 2008 Shit, I have already read this....
MICHAEL POLLACK Don't you know that nobody can make you be shit? You can only let it happen.
JUXIAN TANG Ask me if I give a shit.
JOHN GREEN It's a strange world. Some people get rich and others eat shit and die.
HUNTER S. THOMPSON Why bother to go through life if you can't do interesting shit?
JOHN SANDFORD One "oh shit" can erase a thousand attaboys
SCOTT ADAMS I'll remember 1994 as the year that I ... ate shit.
GREEN DAY a lot of shit happens , then we realise that life is so fucking unfair .. but guess what ? life stil...
LOOKA AD Popatrz jeno. Kościół, karczma, bordel, a w środku między nimi kupa gówna. Oto parabola ludzki...
ANDRZEJ SAPKOWSKI throw enough shit at the wall and some should stick?
LIKE I That's shit and it hasn't anything doing with what I am searching for....
DEYTH BANGER Why do some people feel offended by the word shit, but not by the word poop? Because some little old...
OLIVER MARKUS MALLOY You have less honour than a piece of shit.
ALISON GOODMAN I write one page of masterpiece to ninety-one pages of shit. I try to put the shit in the wastebaske...
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SETH ROLLINS I'm sure there are close calls that we're not even aware of hundreds of times a year. You cr...
SETH MACFARLANE My mother is an incredibly beautiful woman who has laughed at every single thing my father's eve...
SETH MEYERS By 2020, most home computers will have the computing power of a human brain. That doesn't mean t...
SETH SHOSTAK These are some of the things for which we believe the American people owe no little gratitude to the...
SETH LOW The bottom line is that finding orphan planets - small, faint, and located who-knows-where - is not ...
SETH SHOSTAK We're pushing the limits of what a game is, and they think I'm beyond this limit. There will...
SETH PRIEBATSCH In a crowded marketplace, fitting in is a failure. In a busy marketplace, not standing out is the sa...
SETH GODIN The majority of my UFO diet consists of reports describing suspected encounters. This is not surpris...
SETH SHOSTAK When my girlfriend and I talk about being happy, I'll get choked up, which I think is the greate...
SETH MEYERS The nice thing about anger is that, as an emotion, it's strong enough to unplug me from the come...
SETH MEYERS Leadership, on the other hand, is about creating change you believe in.
SETH GODIN I love the English. My God, they brought us 'Benny Hill,' 'Monty Python,' 'The O...
SETH MACFARLANE Junk, redundancy, and inefficiency characterize astrophysical signals. It seems they characterize ce...
SETH SHOSTAK People recognise me and come up to me sometimes, but I'm not like George Clooney.
SETH ROGEN Are we the only members of the Galaxy that can actually understand what a galaxy is? Could Homo sapi...
SETH SHOSTAK Please, please be very, very diligent in what you do. Your actions could affect more than just yours...
BENNIE SETH If you live in a county where they do allow you to do outdoor burning and you know you have a lot of...
BENNIE SETH They're expecting and predicting a very dry early summer, so we need to begin thinking about how we'...
BENNIE SETH We have been completely overwhelmed by the generosity of the citizens of Jacksonville.
BENNIE SETH