I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave it, and then I'm gonna rip it off.
Ellen DeGeneres
Related
I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Okay.
JOHN GREEN Im okay Im okay now.
But you really need to listen to me
'cause im telling you the trut...
GERARD WAY Although I cannot see your face
As you flip these poems awhile,
Somewhere from some far-of...
SHEL SILVERSTEIN Do. Then talk. In that order.
SOTERO M LOPEZ II The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
ADRIEN BRODY Im still runnin against the wind
Well Im older now and still
Against the wind
BOB SEGER I think Ellen DeGeneres is just hysterical.
PAUL RUDD I mumble a lot when im off stage, so a lot of times when im with a friend i'll say something and he'...
MITCH HEDBERG I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, So...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, ''...
ELLEN DEGENERES Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution.
Procrastinate now, don’t put it...
ELLEN DEGENERES There is no longer any excuse for not adopting corporate IM. But businesses should establish policie...
TOM EID Who knows, it could have been Hillary Clinton herself, doing a Freudian slip during a commercial bre...
BRIAN DONAHUE Who knows, it could have been Hillary Clinton herself, doing a Freudian slip during a commercial bre...
BRIAN DONAHUE IT departments have spent a lot of money on security. They've hardened the castle walls but left the...
ART GILLILAND Im James Bond. Im Jason Bourne. Im Super-freaking-Mario come to life.
JOHN DAVID ANDERSON It's not being marketed as a gay show by a gay person. It's just Ellen DeGeneres.
KYAN DOUGLAS All that I have done will be remembered when I am all said and done.
TRUMAINE M. PRESSLEY Instinct's the iron skeleton under all our ideas of free will.
STEPHEN KING I have never needed anyone's approval, i decide what i want and i go and get it...
SHANE J VAN DER VELDE Im a soulless lawyer. Give me any opinion and I can argue it.
MEGYN KELLY I'm baking an apple pie tonight, and I dont care Mr.Carb.. Im eating it at 10pm with ice cream,. Tak...
NERISSA IRVING Prices are rising, but not fast enough to prompt the central bank to raise interest rates. Inflation...
IM NO JUNG I expect consumer spending to continue to improve. The central bank is likely to raise interest rate...
IM NO JUNG The negative impact of high international oil prices was big in August. We can still expect a recove...
IM NO JUNG Im A Good Friend, But Im A Better Enemy.
DONALD C HALL Freiheit ist etwas Maßloses. Im Guten wie im Schlechten.
CARSTEN K. RATH Something did happen, and I really don't feel proud of it.
DEYTH BANGER You can turn off the sun, but im still ganna shine!
JASON MRAZ To stand on the
brink of what is coming, feeling eager, optimistic anticipation—with no feeli...
ASK AND IT IS GIVEN Im not a politician and my other habits are good. Ive no enemys to reward, nor friends to sponge. Bu...
ARTEMUS WARD The mainstream needs Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell. The mainstream needs RuPaul.
BILLY EICHNER The benefits of IM are undeniable for businesses, yet the security risks and challenges are paramoun...
CHRIS SHIPLEY From now on, I’m gonna live for myself. And, don’t you dare get in my head, ‘cause I’ll rip ...
MARIANA CORRêA COSTA Im still betting on you. - Cinna.
SUZANNE COLLINS Don't run away.
Im not running away. Im already gone.
-Lena and Ethan
KAMI GARCIA If you want a revenge, don't hold it. It poisons you.
Either you just let the grudge go, or mak...
TOBA BETA You must be the person you have never had the courage to be. Gradually, you will discover that you a...
PAULO COELHO It ends or it doesn't.
That’s what you say. That’s
how you get through it.
The tu...
CAITLYN SIEHL i know im not the girl you wanted. not the one you want to hear from. but what you see is what you g...
SIMI GREWAL Tomorrow is promised to no one. Prioritize today accordingly.
GINA GREENLEE Name the fears that are holding you back. It's the equivalent of flooding the boogeyman with light.
GINA GREENLEE I over analyze situations because Im scared of what may happen if I'm not prepared for it.
TURCOIS OMINEK dont read my diary when im gone, ok im going to work now , when you wake up please read my diary, lo...
KURT COBAIN Im trending therefore I am.
EDWARD SQUIRE The same ocean of love became the ocean of sorrow in which I drowned...
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN I love my destruction.
Cause I still love the cause of my destruction
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN She broke her own heart by holding him into it....
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN She craved for the moon, not knowing there were other stars in the sky too...
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN You know your value,
Only when someone else crumbles it...
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN To be street smart it takes respect of a persons ability to control their emotional state and to kno...
GARY F EVANS... Just like any one of us, they started with no road map or guarantee of success. But they went out an...
CAMILLE SWEENEY His name was engraved deep in the core of her heart..
- Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN I will lock my feelings up and throw the key in the ocean till someone comes, ready to hunt the dept...
ANSHIKA JAIN It's funny.. I still love the person who made me lose my ability to love...
-Anshika.
ANSHIKA JAIN Its like I'm a broken mirror.. Don't try to pick my shattered pieces or you will hurt yourself ....
...
ANSHIKA JAIN The story was so broken that no one could ever find the missing pieces....
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN Their story was just a chapter to him...
-Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN You can't be a pussy all your life Todd. Someday you're just gonna have to say fuck it.
DONALD RAY POLLOCK Fortunately, my care factor was now dangerously close to fuck-it levels.
KYLIE SCOTT We do not have federated IM. We firmly believe you need a separate channel from any public IM system...
BOB SHIMP When I was a kid, Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell were mere blips on the gaydar; and they we...
BETH DITTO Highways are like rivers, everytime im on a highway or a river, it makes my mind flow, nonstopping, ...
TERRY VISAKAY "yes i own a whaler boat, it slides across the sea some folks say im a part of it i know its part of...
JIMMY BUFFETT Im in the state of Imbroglio
NOBLE DA GENIUS If a company is distributing images and video then obviously they need bandwidth solutions. But if t...
JACK LONDON (IT SPECIALIST) Im for rules but when rules conflicts humanity i will stand against it at all cost
MICHAEL STRONG She bought seeds and raided nurseries and mulched and composted and spent full days with her hands f...
SARAH DESSEN You get to the point where you're like, 'I'm just doing me, and if people don't like...
BEBE REXHA Don't ever reject a small
when you can't take it all.
TOBA BETA When I then turned toward the scriptures, they appeared to me to be quite unworthy to be compared wi...
AUGUSTINE OF HIPPO VIEW FROM A HILL
I am not yet quite over it.
I am lying down on top of it.
Surv...
JOHN TOTTENHAM You were many wonderful things to many people before you met him--don't let this one event define wh...
MARY ESSELMAN It is what it is, it is what you make it.
JAMES DURBIN Im very nurturing.
TAMARA ECCLESTONE My doctor said I dont use the same side of the brain everyone else uses. lol.. Im insane laawwwwdd ....
NERISSA IRVING If you have a question, ask. How do you ask? Say it or write it
SOTONYE ANGA Just get it right, “it is not too late to dream”. You can do it now! This very moment, I mean ri...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Im proud that Im a politician. A politician is a man who understands government, and it takes a poli...
HARRY S TRUMAN if you cannot get it all right, don't get it all wrong
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH You are an adult and you don't understand me and what are the differences between the adult and the ...
DEYTH BANGER When you look at the inner workings of electrical things, you see wires. Until the current passes th...
MOTHER TERESA The issue of IM is that it's being used on the public networks. IM is subject to all the same proble...
ANDREW LOCHART Today's college graduates take IM in the office for granted. If you protect your email systems but i...
ED GOLOD I feel that the 200 IM is his signature event and he deserves to be able to do it without a 200 back...
BOB BOWMAN Never felt lyk im alone bcoz my soul always follows me dats wat make me feel im not alone & I"ll nev...
RAKSHAN BHANDARY It is the touch of a lover's arms that I so desperately crave, not the memories of a love no longer ...
D.S. MIXELL What if you couldn't bank on a future...what would you do now? Things can change in the blink of an ...
ELIZABETH ALRAUNE If therefore you shall be remembered for what you did with what you had more than what you had, use ...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Im going to be eighty soon, and I guess the one thing that puzzles me most is how quick it got here.
ROY ACUFF Yes Im young,We Belong,Love Is Sung,By the peaceful Song...Listen Please, You'll fall to your knees,...
NOT YER TYPICAL DORK Beckett started the Hummer and texted Eve:
Tak4e Ur Cloth3s OFF Im on my qway
Her reply ca...
DEBRA ANASTASIA Risks can lead to great victories or defeats. Even if you are defeated, the lesson will be valuable ...
LAILAH GIFTYAKITA If you can dream it, you can do it.
ENZO FERRARI Do the thing and you will have the power.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON You don't find interesting stuff because you don't search enough, ... every book has it's own lesson...
DEYTH BANGER the sentence im reading is terrific ...
J.D. SALINGER What is worse, I leave it. What can't be understand, I leave it. What is bad, I leave it. What I say...
DEYTH BANGER If you plan of helping you don't need of saying it, act on it.
ANN MARIE AGUILAR
More Ellen DeGeneres
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ELLEN DEGENERES I would love for the world to be happier.
ELLEN DEGENERES I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me...
ELLEN DEGENERES So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying i...
ELLEN DEGENERES If you're going to be honest with yourself, you have to admit that you go into show business wan...
ELLEN DEGENERES The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think peop...
ELLEN DEGENERES Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
ELLEN DEGENERES And now I've got to explain the smell that was in there before I went in there. Does that ever happe...
ELLEN DEGENERES Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are.
ELLEN DEGENERES The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens....
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I...
ELLEN DEGENERES Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm just saying we can all work on our manners. We can say please and thank you. We can be punctual....
ELLEN DEGENERES Above all things physical, it is more important to be beautiful on the inside - to have a big hear a...
ELLEN DEGENERES Life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The thing everyone should reali...
ELLEN DEGENERES It always helps to think about other people instead of ourselves.
ELLEN DEGENERES If someone ever says you’re weird, say thank you.
ELLEN DEGENERES If your Birthday is on Christmas day and you're not Jesus, you should start telling people your birt...
ELLEN DEGENERES You just have to keep driving down the road. It's going to bend and curve and you'll speed up and sl...
ELLEN DEGENERES Haiku sounds like I'm
Saying hi to someone named
Ku. Hi, Ku. Hello.
ELLEN DEGENERES Answers to Frequently Asked Questions:
Yes.
Yes.
No.
One time in high school. ELLEN DEGENERES Contribute to the world. Help people. Help one person. Help someone cross the street today. Help som...
ELLEN DEGENERES Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim thr...
ELLEN DEGENERES The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yours...
ELLEN DEGENERES So be who you really are. Embrace who you are. Literally. Hug yourself. Accept who you are. Unless y...
ELLEN DEGENERES Who's to say what's better or worse anyway? Who's to even say what's normal or average? We're all di...
ELLEN DEGENERES Our flaws are what makes us human. If we can accept them as part of who we are, they really don't ev...
ELLEN DEGENERES Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also ha...
ELLEN DEGENERES Way, way back in the day, like in the 1990s, if you wanted to tell everyone you ate waffles for brea...
ELLEN DEGENERES I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clappin...
ELLEN DEGENERES I personally like being unique. I like being my own person with my own style and my own opinions and...
ELLEN DEGENERES It's failure that gives you the proper perspective on success.
ELLEN DEGENERES It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive.
ELLEN DEGENERES Find out who you are and figure out what you believe in. Even if it's different from what your neigh...
ELLEN DEGENERES What’s not so great is that all this technology is destroying our social skills. Not only have we ...
ELLEN DEGENERES True beauty is not related to what color your hair is or what color your eyes are. True beauty is ab...
ELLEN DEGENERES Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.
ELLEN DEGENERES When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when...
ELLEN DEGENERES My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the c...
ELLEN DEGENERES Laugh. Laugh as much as you can. Laugh until you cry. Cry until you laugh. Keep doing it even if peo...
ELLEN DEGENERES If you want to test cosmetics, why do it on some poor animal who hasn't done anything? They should u...
ELLEN DEGENERES I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful ...
ELLEN DEGENERES You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, So...
ELLEN DEGENERES Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
ELLEN DEGENERES I was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is c...
ELLEN DEGENERES Don't give advice. It will come back and bite you in the [butt]. Don't take anyone's advice. So, my ...
ELLEN DEGENERES The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhar...
ELLEN DEGENERES The only thing I really recommend, if you're starting out in stand-up is to not try to copy anyb...
ELLEN DEGENERES People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
ELLEN DEGENERES The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the ...
ELLEN DEGENERES People give me such a hard time because I don't wear dresses. What's that got to do with any...
ELLEN DEGENERES My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Find out who you are and be that person. That's what your soul was put on this Earth to be. Find...
ELLEN DEGENERES I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beauti...
ELLEN DEGENERES I don't pay attention to the number of birthdays. It's weird when I say I'm 53. It just ...
ELLEN DEGENERES We focus so much on our differences, and that is creating, I think, a lot of chaos and negativity an...
ELLEN DEGENERES Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.
ELLEN DEGENERES I think everybody should have the same anger towards the injustice that's happening and the hatr...
ELLEN DEGENERES I have sadness in me. I have anger in me. I have heartbreak in me.
ELLEN DEGENERES Whatever you define family as, family is just a part of belonging to something that takes care of yo...
ELLEN DEGENERES We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I get those fleeting, beautiful moments of inner peace and stillness - and then the other 23 hours a...
ELLEN DEGENERES If we're destroying our trees and destroying our environment and hurting animals and hurting one...
ELLEN DEGENERES Here are the values that I stand for: honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the w...
ELLEN DEGENERES It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. Are they...
ELLEN DEGENERES Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.
ELLEN DEGENERES I just want to find somebody special, somebody that I click with.
ELLEN DEGENERES We have two dogs, Mabel and Wolf, and three cats at home, Charlie, George and Chairman. We have two ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I didn't grow up in a house - we moved a lot, and we always lived in apartments. But we looked a...
ELLEN DEGENERES Right before I decided to come out, I went on a spiritual retreat called 'Changing the Inner Dia...
ELLEN DEGENERES Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's j...
ELLEN DEGENERES I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm sure there's somebody out there who doesn't like Betty White because she's short...
ELLEN DEGENERES I love kids. But that's such a big commitment. And it seems long-term. It seems like a commitmen...
ELLEN DEGENERES I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about w...
ELLEN DEGENERES I like being busy and juggling a lot of things at the same time. I get bored easily, so I need to do...
ELLEN DEGENERES I work really hard at trying to see the big picture and not getting stuck in ego. I believe we'r...
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm not an activist; I don't look for controversy. I'm not a political person, but I'...
ELLEN DEGENERES My father was a first reader in the Christian Science Church, which is similar to being a preacher. ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I became vegan because I saw footage of what really goes on in the slaughterhouses and on the dairy ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm so unfamiliar with the gym, I call it James!
ELLEN DEGENERES My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we d...
ELLEN DEGENERES I do have ADD and in real life, I'm all over the place and can hardly focus. If we were talking ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tabl...
ELLEN DEGENERES You know, it's hard work to write a book. I can't tell you how many times I really get going on an i...
ELLEN DEGENERES When I was younger I thought success was something different. I thought, " When I grow up, I want to...
ELLEN DEGENERES You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I thi...
ELLEN DEGENERES What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool at all. I mean, I had a mullet and wore...
ELLEN DEGENERES I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe ...
ELLEN DEGENERES The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I've been getting that since fourth grade. I guess I'm ...
ELLEN DEGENERES The good psychic would pick up the phone before it rang. Of course it is possible there was noone on...
ELLEN DEGENERES Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. B...
ELLEN DEGENERES I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I...
ELLEN DEGENERES They say you just stand over there, he'll say thank you and you walk back off and that's what I thou...
ELLEN DEGENERES In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was s...
ELLEN DEGENERES Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and ha...
ELLEN DEGENERES Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
ELLEN DEGENERES Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
ELLEN DEGENERES My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we d...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. I...
ELLEN DEGENERES For me, it's that I contributed, ... That I'm on this planet doing some good and making people happy...
ELLEN DEGENERES I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but lo...
ELLEN DEGENERES Life is like one big Mardi Gras. But instead of showing your boobs, show people your brain, and if t...
ELLEN DEGENERES Some of the most devastating things that happen to you will teach you the most.
ELLEN DEGENERES Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else's path unless you're in the wo...
ELLEN DEGENERES People love gossip. It's the biggest thing that keeps the entertainment industry going.
ELLEN DEGENERES And we certainly don't have full conversations on cellphones. You know? Usually the reception is so ...
ELLEN DEGENERES "I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they're seeing too much. Everything is abo...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had...
ELLEN DEGENERES its like picking your least favorite color of the rainbow
ELLEN DEGENERES I have a great career, and I have wonderful fans who really are supportive and loyal - because I'...
ELLEN DEGENERES Our egos tells us we're the only ones that have any kind of feelings. We're the only ones with a rel...
ELLEN DEGENERES People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
ELLEN DEGENERES And be sure to look for me next month when I host the North Korean Peoples Choice Awards.
ELLEN DEGENERES We've quit our agents, let go of our publicist. We're selling our house and leaving town.
ELLEN DEGENERES Soap Talk.
ELLEN DEGENERES There are a million people who are refugees, ... Life goes on, and if it didn't impact you directly,...
ELLEN DEGENERES [I went to a] coffee shop here and the smallest coffee is a tall... "I need a coffee with a side of ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I didn't want the Web site to be impersonal and I wanted to interact with people, ... The hammer and...
ELLEN DEGENERES "Here's the analogy. If my body were a car, I'd be thinking about trading it in around now. I would ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Oh she tripped?....Nooo, she's running. I thought she tripped but she's running. She stopped running...
ELLEN DEGENERES Friends will write me letters. They run out of room on the front of the letter. They write 'over' on...
ELLEN DEGENERES [Golden eagles have an interesting way of mating, where they connect in the air while flying at eigh...
ELLEN DEGENERES I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just like...
ELLEN DEGENERES I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind of w...
ELLEN DEGENERES Faith is part of who I am, yes. I was raised Christian Scientist. The most important thing I saw eve...
ELLEN DEGENERES I do fantasize about having my own shop one day.
ELLEN DEGENERES But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's g...
ELLEN DEGENERES Just go up to somebody on the street and say "You're it!" and just run away.
ELLEN DEGENERES In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. The...
ELLEN DEGENERES If we're destroying our trees and destroying our environment and hurting animals and hurting one...
ELLEN DEGENERES ...if you want to add a little spice to your life, plant some dill. And learn to salsa.
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm a lesbian, an Aquarian, and a vegetarian.
ELLEN DEGENERES I do like men and I had, you know, a guy in high school that I wanted to marry desperately. He's...
ELLEN DEGENERES When we were growing up our parents somehow made it clear that being famous was good. And I mistaken...
ELLEN DEGENERES Dan: 'Ah, well, I hope this didn't have anything to do with me.'
Ellen: 'No, not unless y...
ELLEN DEGENERES My aunt has lost everything, she has nothing. She grabbed four pictures out of her house. She's lost...
ELLEN DEGENERES My dad is still Christian Scientist. My mom's not, and I'm not. But I believe in God, and th...
ELLEN DEGENERES Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
ELLEN DEGENERES "I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises." ELLEN DEGENERES "I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just lik...
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm probably the most honest person you'll ever meet - to a fault, like, I-will-hurt-your-fe...
ELLEN DEGENERES Hosting the Oscars is pretty much the scariest thing you can do. To me, this is right up there with ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I would say 'no'! It's such a thankless job. If you do great, nobody mentions it. If you don't, ever...
ELLEN DEGENERES I think I let go of the need for approval,
ELLEN DEGENERES I think I let go of the need for approval, ... It certainly feels good when you get it, but I used t...
ELLEN DEGENERES But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's get o...
ELLEN DEGENERES "I see those picketers, and I think you know, if I weren't a loving, non-violent, spiritual person, ...
ELLEN DEGENERES The sixties were when hallucinogenic drugs were really, really big. And I don't think it's a coincid...
ELLEN DEGENERES "I swear if Colgate comes out with one more type of toothepaste. I just want clean teeth that's all ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called ...
ELLEN DEGENERES You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me be...
ELLEN DEGENERES The problem with labels is that they lead to stereotypes and stereotypes lead to generalizations and...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had...
ELLEN DEGENERES Don't hold onto things, it will only bring you pain.
ELLEN DEGENERES That's what life is all about. There's a lot of crying. So you'd better cry now and get used to it.
ELLEN DEGENERES The only way a no-legged leopard could hurt you is if it fell out of a tree onto your head.
ELLEN DEGENERES I still get scared at night. Every tiny creak, every little noise, I open my eyes real wide and list...
ELLEN DEGENERES [• Ellen DeGeneres , who was praised for her graceful performance as host of the Emmy Awards that ...
ELLEN DEGENERES We'll go see some theater, and we'll hang out and do some stuff there. We'll go to clubs, ... Ellen ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, ''...
ELLEN DEGENERES I feel sorry for the newscasters you know? We can turn it off. But that's their job and they have to...
ELLEN DEGENERES "I'm feeling so good. I feel like a million bucks. I'm focused, I'm alert, I'm zippy and top of my g...
ELLEN DEGENERES Come on, if you don't win tonight it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it just means you're not...
ELLEN DEGENERES You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
ELLEN DEGENERES "I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises."
ELLEN DEGENERES Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that...
ELLEN DEGENERES Hello?..Oh, hi Tom. Ooh, I've been dying to see that movie...Mmm no, I just opened up some yogurt. I...
ELLEN DEGENERES It's definitely a heterosexual feeling, but it's directed at you.
ELLEN DEGENERES Yeah [I'm thirty-six], but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old w...
ELLEN DEGENERES I was raised around heterosexuals, as all heterosexuals are, that's where us gay people come from......
ELLEN DEGENERES Trying to get the talk show, looking back on it, we had to beg a lot of station managers to pick up ...
ELLEN DEGENERES The first house I bought was a little Spanish bungalow on Clinton Street in West Hollywood, right be...
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave ...
ELLEN DEGENERES It's not like I grew up playing pranks on people, and I was not that girl in school.
ELLEN DEGENERES I just like observing people - it's something I've done ever since I was a kid, and I got re...
ELLEN DEGENERES Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year...
ELLEN DEGENERES Anne wrote it for me and directed, so I was stuck with it, ... We always got along. It's almost gros...
ELLEN DEGENERES New Orleans is my hometown, and our thoughts and prayers go out to everyone affected.
ELLEN DEGENERES I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my...
ELLEN DEGENERES In the beginning there was nothing. God said, ‘Let there be light!’ And there was light. There w...
ELLEN DEGENERES I get bored easily, so I need to do a lot. I've started a record label, so I get to nurture new ...
ELLEN DEGENERES I enjoy growing older and wiser and learning from my mistakes every single day.
ELLEN DEGENERES I've moved about 10 times over the past 15 years. I don't move for the sole purpose of getti...
ELLEN DEGENERES The first time probably people really were aware of me, I unfortunately had the title of Showtime...
ELLEN DEGENERES Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses,...
ELLEN DEGENERES Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe's way of saying stop, slo...
ELLEN DEGENERES Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen ...
ELLEN DEGENERES Our attention span is shot. We've all got Attention Deficit Disorder or ADD or OCD or one of these d...
ELLEN DEGENERES You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She...
ELLEN DEGENERES I would love to have the same rights as everybody else. I would love, I don't care if it's c...
ELLEN DEGENERES I'm grateful for everything. I'm grateful for my health, and I'm so grateful for the lov...
ELLEN DEGENERES I say always follow your passion, no matter what, because even if it's not the same financial su...
ELLEN DEGENERES There would be nothing to get me to run for president. I don't even understand how anyone would ...
ELLEN DEGENERES