Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?

I was this non-threatening funny guy who contrasted the image of the Brezhnevs and the Reagans of the world.

It was pretty clear that I was a funny guy, just as a guy.

You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.

I never saw myself as a comedian. I saw myself as a guy who can act funny.