John Scalzi
Related I know that asshole you were with in college --” JOSH LANYON JONATHAN TROPPER CASSANDRA CLARE CHARLES BUKOWSKI Are you going to be nice to me now?"JEZ MORROW MAGGIE STIEFVATER CASSANDRA CLARE JAMIE MCGUIRE MICHELLE HODKIN LISA KESSLER -And I'm sorry too.ASTRID AMARA See? Grumpy. And defensive. If you need help, ask me, you stubborn asshole.”MAISEY YATES MICHELLE HODKIN JUSTIN HALPERN MICHELLE HODKIN WILLIAM S. BURROUGHS MICHELLE HODKIN „Listen,” Richard says, „unless you're about to inherit some money, what we're talking about h... JESS WALTER not like riding a bike, you asshole! ALEXANDRA BRACKEN
You Chose
SHANNON L. ALDER The phone rang, picked up, and the same male voice announced, “Chris Powers."JOSH LANYON She and I had exchanged a few text messages, although they had been mostly to remind me just how pis... SUZANNE WRIGHT PENELOPE DOUGLAS You’re such an asshole,” I mumbled, staring at her perfect tits. “Why the fuck do I even like ... NICOLE JACQUELYN I cut off his fingers to get him to talk, and when he'd confessed everything I wanted to hear, I had... SCOTT LYNCH MICHELLE HODKIN RACHEL CAINE MAYA ANGELOU LEWIS CARROLL at first I thought you were just using me" she saidPAUL NEILAN I twist like a flower KAIT ROKOWSKI JOHN SCALZI CAITLYN SIEHL ANTHONY HOROWITZ VERA NAZARIAN A Gift for YouS.A.R.K. Daniel, he said. I would have you follow me.ELIZABETH GEORGE SPEARE If you weren't religious, you would still be as much of an asshole as you already are now. JEFFREY FISCHER JONATHAN TROPPER SAMANTHA YOUNG MELINA MARCHETTA George walked into the room and looked at each of us in turn, ending with Thierry. MICHELLE ROWEN JENNIFER L. ARMENTROUT ROBERT KIRKMAN GREG BEHRENDT CASSANDRA CLARE P.C. CAST DAVE MATTHEWS BAND DEREK LANDY Once an asshole, always an asshole. DEB CALETTI Before you represent your faith on your car's bumper you have to first make a pledge with God to not... T. RAFAEL CIMINO A.E. COPPARD KRISTEN ASHLEY NIKKI ROWE JOHN GREEN RICHELLE MEAD GREG BEHRENDT RAINBOW ROWELL LEWIS CARROLL CECELIA AHERN RICHARD SIKEN ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPéRY I like you,” Gary finally said in a low voice. T.J. KLUNE COCO J. GINGER C.S. LEWIS PENELOPE DOUGLAS CHARLOTTE ERIKSSON Questions, I've got some questionsJACK JOHNSON RICHELLE MEAD You read a book for the story, for each of its words," Gordy said, "and you draw your cartoons for t... SHERMAN ALEXIE SARAH DESSEN TERRY PRATCHETT JERRY SPINELLI TRUMAN CAPOTE I told you everything I know", said the messenger. Arin had gone to his childhood suite, feeling anx... MARIE RUTKOSKI ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE JIM BUTCHER JOHN GREEN JALALUDDIN MEVLANA RUMI He apologized profusely. “I knew that frog position was too freaky. I’m sorry.” DEBRA ANASTASIA SUZANNE COLLINS ITALO CALVINO RACHEL COHN RICK RIORDAN Here’s the deal. We go in, you stand there like the asshole you are, and I explain you aren’t ga... DEBRA ANASTASIA IAIN PEARS DEYTH BANGER STEVEN MOFFAT J.K. ROWLING Tell me, have you done much circus work in your life?' [asked Mulder].LES MARTIN Advanced Potion-Making , is it, Potter?”J.K. ROWLING DOUGLAS COUPLAND Something about you caught me by surprise R.S. GREY DEYTH BANGER C.S. LEWIS TERRY PRATCHETT I have come to your group for somewhere to belong, ELISE ICTEN HARUKI MURAKAMI NEIL GAIMAN RICK RIORDAN
More John Scalzi
JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI all fucking inhuman monsters, and we don’t see... JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI intensely interesting," Duvall said. "So you're a priest of the Forshan religion... JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI Do not mourn me, friends JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI else that's... JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN SCALZI JOHN OLIVER JOHN BERGER JOHN WYCLIFFE JOHN ROBERTS Human beings, we have dark sides; we have dark issues in our lives. To progress anywhere in life, yo... JOHN NOBLE DAYMOND JOHN Being thrown into the fire and getting the thing turned around in a hurry made it more difficult. Th... JOHN ELWAY JOHN TYLER JOHN LENNON JOHN MORTIMER No power on earth has a right to take our property from us without our consent. JOHN JAY JOHN LOCKE JOHN MAYER JOHN LEWIS JOHN LEWIS JOHN CALVIN JOHN MADDEN JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN CLAYTON JOHN BURROUGHS JOHN MADDEN ELTON JOHN JOHN LEGEND I have learned in fashion to be a little savage. JOHN FAIRCHILD JOHN PRESCOTT My consultant keeps telling me sudden death could come at any moment. JOHN TAVENER JOHN BATTELLE JOHN MUIR Inherent in architecture, it involves everything in life so that there is absolutely no end to it. B... JOHN LAUTNER JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE JOHN WAYNE You learn a lot more from the lows because it makes you pay attention to what you're doing. JOHN ELWAY I've experienced the highest of highs and lowest of lows. I think to really appreciate anything ... JOHN ELWAY JOHN WOODEN JOHN LENNON JOHN LITHGOW Buildings should serve people, not the other way around. JOHN PORTMAN JOHN DONNE JOHN MCCARTHY JOHN MALKOVICH I think people took Grenada for what it turned out to be, which was a very specific incident and fro... JOHN NEGROPONTE JOHN LUKACS JOHN WOODEN JOHN MILTON JOHN GLENN JOHN HEYWOOD JOHN HEYWOOD JOHN HEYWOOD JOHN HEYWOOD JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CIARDI JOHN CENA JOHN CHEEVER Lay this unto your breast: Old friends, like old swords, still are trusted best. JOHN WEBSTER JOHN SELDEN JOHN MAYER JOHN HEYWOOD You win by working hard, making tough decisions and building coalitions. JOHN ENGLER I love the description of Gothic churches before the printed word, that they were the bibles of the ... JOHN MCGAHERN The last thing on my mind was to be an actor, but I had a crush on a cute girl in the drama departme... JOHN RATZENBERGER He who laughs most, learns best. JOHN CLEESE Some people feel fulfillment from a bitter end - it gives them some sort of sense of reality. But, w... JOHN BOYEGA JOHN MADDEN JOHN WOODEN JOHN WOODEN JOHN WOODEN JOHN WOODEN JOHN WOODEN JOHN LOCKE JOHN LOCKE JOHN LOCKE JOHN LOCKE JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON JOHN LENNON
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Well, I hate to tell you this," she said, "but your friend is an asshole."
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ASSHOLES, BABY? YOU'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE, I'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE! YOU GO TO THE STORE AN... 
No homework. I got suspended,” Blue replied.
Bitten? You mean you're a-"
Teach that asshole some manners.”
Why?' He asked.
You should've known this ring belongs to me. Eye of the tiger."
I punched him nos so lightly in the arm. 'Asshole.'
On Sharing
Did I ever tell you about the man
That was not like riding a bike, you asshole! 
You Chose
We never lost that. As much as I tried, I
What could I say? Noah, despite you being an asshole, or maybe because of it, I'd like to rip off yo... 
Your father's an asshole. It's not a disease. You don't have to catch it. 
You said to lean on your arm
Cheshire Puss,' she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know whether it would like the name... 
1. Everyone is entitled to their opinion about the things they read (or watch, or listen to, or tast... 
eat, baby.
Your name?"The movements of the man's mouth didn't quite match what he was saying, so seeing him spe... 
Most of us have nicknames—annoying, endearing, embarrassing.
How do we exorcise one of the Jinn?" 
How would you like it if I said to you, 'It kills me to say this, but you're actually a tiny bit bea... 
Aliens—if they exist—are little green men with big eyes and spindly arms or…or giant insects o... 
Now get the fuck up off the ground so I can put you in it... like a coffin. Because you'll be fuckin... 
Busy' is another word for 'asshole'. 'Asshole' is another word for the guy you're dating. 
You are interfering in my business, warlock." 
Damien has died and gone straight to boy heaven,' Shaunee said as soon as we were out of earshot
I know in my mind
The door handle turned. Someone knocked, and a man's voice called, "Uh, hello?"
I am Shiloh, whose box you stole. Your godmother's sickness lies in your own keeping, you can heal h... 
Um, I don’t know your name but -”
My name is CRPS, or so they say 
«Hazel Grace,” he said, my name new and better in his voice. “It has been a real pleasure to ma... 
Whatever happened to the dragon?"
You already have one asshole, you don't need another one 
No, I know,” Levi said. “But it’s not you. You don’t push through every moment. You pay atte... 
Must a name mean something?" Alice asked doubtfully.
To the most inconsiderate asshole of a friend,
I had a dream about you. We were in the gold room
So the little prince tamed the fox. And when the hour of his departure drew near--
I remember when your name was just another name that rolled without thought off my tongue.
But what would have been the good?"
So you will meet many ’someones’ who will give a new definition to your name. 
what's your name?"
What the hell," I said, pushing off the wall, ready to take off the head of whatever stupid salesper... 
Witches are naturally nosy,” said Miss Tick, standing up. “Well, I must go. I hope we shall meet... 
Who are you?'
You cold or something?' he said. She strained against him; she wanted to pass clear through him: 'It... 
You say that your fare told you that he was a detective?"
I was sitting in my lab, my hand spread open on the table, while the skull examined my palm.
May I see you again?" he asked. There was an endearing nervousness in his voice. 
I choose to love you in silence…
What say you, Luxa?" said Vikus.
There is still one of which you never speak.'
Who's Jessie?"
Do yourself a favor,' I said. "Forget it. Forget you ever saw me."
I have brought peace to this land, and security," he began.
Please... Please
Rory: Amy. I'm gonna need a little help here.
How long have you been ‘Big D’ then?” said Harry.
This is your copy of Advanced Potion-Making, is it, Potter?”
Remember how, back in 1990, if you used a cellphone in public you looked like a total asshole? We're... 
Many bad things were done under the Evil Empire" she said. "The best we can do now is undo them. Wil... 
I made up my mind I was going to find someone who would love me unconditionally three hundred and si... 
You're a poem?' I repeated.
Poseidon raised his eyebrows as they shook hands. “Blowfish, did you say?”
I did two things on my seventy-fifth birthday. I visited my wife's grave. Then I joined the army.
People start panicking because they think it's the end of everything. But the fact is, you know,... 
My family is from Liverpool, so I have some of those vowel sounds, I've got the slack tone of so... 
Protest and anger practically always derives from hope, and the shouting out against injustice is al... 
No man is to be credited for his mere authority's sake, unless he can show Scripture for the mai... 
By ensuring that no one in government has too much power, the Constitution helps protect ordinary Am... 
Learn as many mistakes and what not to do while your business or product is small. Don't be in s... 
This Constitution was not made for a day, nor is it composed of such flexible materials as to be war... 
Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans. 
Farce is tragedy played at a thousand revolutions per minute. 
Every man has a property in his own person. This nobody has a right to, but himself. 
High School is like a spork: it's a crappy spoon and a crappy fork, so in the end it's just ... 
When I was growing up in rural Alabama, it was impossible for me to register to vote. I didn't b... 
The documented incidences of voter fraud are very rare, yet throughout the country, forces have mobi... 
Seeing that a Pilot steers the ship in which we sail, who will never allow us to perish even in the ... 
I was introduced to the Turducken in New Orleans. And it wasn't Thanksgiving. Glenn at the Gourm... 
Christians were instructed to serve others, and the thanksgiving was for the grace of God and the fa... 
How beautiful the leaves grow old. How full of light and color are their last days. 
You wouldn't do something for a receiver to catch the ball if the quarterback couldn't throw... 
I'm not everybody's cup of tea. But sometimes criticism can be hurtful. Be respectful. I'... 
The prison-industrial complex, poverty, and the school system has more effect on a young black male ... 
Perhaps they thought I was on a fact-finding mission, never for one moment thinking that a man of my... 
As you grow older, you learn a few things. One of them is to actually take the time you've allot... 
When California was wild, it was the floweriest part of the continent. 
My folks always let me go to the movies every Saturday. We were really motion-picture goers. 
I was ashamed to admit I was hipped to the idea of acting. That's why I started in with the prop... 
I'd read up on the history of our country and I'd become fascinated with the story of the Al... 
If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doing anything. I'm positive that a doer ... 
Surrealism had a great effect on me because then I realised that the imagery in my mind wasn't i... 
Take care, be kind, be considerate of other people and other species, and be loving. 
No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent. 
Self-righteousness has killed more people than smoking. 
If you don't interfere with me, I'll always do something really good. 
Generalizations, like brooms, ought not to stand in a corner forever; they ought to sweep as a matte... 
Well, if you're true to yourself you're going to be true to everyone else. 
The mind is its own place and in itself, can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven. 
I'm not interested in my legacy. I made up a word: 'live-acy.' I'm more interested i... 
The loss of wealth is loss of dirt, as sages in all times assert; The happy man's without a shir... 
Those who agree with us may not be right, but we admire their astuteness. 
When all candles be out, all cats be grey. 
Written by a sponge dipped in warm milk and sprinkled with sugar. 
It is easy enough to praise men for the courage of their convictions. I wish I could teach the sad y... 
Nothing goes further toward a man's liberation than the act of surviving his need for character. 
With any of the movies I've had a chance to do, or any of the TV shows I've had a chance to ... 
The deep joy we take in the company of people with whom we have just recently fallen in love is undi... 
Old friends are best. 
They say stay in the lines, but there's always something better on the other side. 
If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over? 
It is of great use to the sailor to know the length of his line, though he cannot with it fathom all... 
It doesn't matter how long my hair is or what colour my skin is or whether I'm a woman or a ... 