My past self would've hated who I am today
And I still feel that hatred in the parts of him that stayed

I’ve been worried since I left the womb
Like a schizophrenic on shrooms
Like a hypochondriac on crack
Never shy with the panic attacks;
Internal reality succumbs to psychosis
Dreams destroyed by self-diagnosis.

My ideal date would involve painful silence. My ideal date wouldn't involve me.

I came up with a new reason
To write your name today
I plagiarized each letter
From a love note you wrote me.
The scent of ink was sacred to me
In that relapsed moment…
For a minute I could pretend
The paper reminded me of your skin;
I could pretend the glimmering ink
Was the moonlit lake
Of our summer night.
But the pretending crumpled with paper
And I threw us into the trash can
For the bridge between us is long burned
And it’s time I accepted that.

Like two stars in the depths of the sky
This gravity is just irresistible
We spin around each other, you and I
When I fell for you, I fell into your orbit.

I found a night’s sky full of stars
In your cinematic eyes
And heard a symphony
In your laughter.