One of my girlfriends was getting married. This was becoming an annoying pattern.

Then they have the audacity to go shopping and pick out their own gifts. I want to know who the first person was who said this was okay. After spending all that money on a bachelorette weekend, a shower, and often a flight across the country, they expect you to go to Williams Sonoma or Pottery Barn and do research? Then they send you a thank-you note applauding you for such a thoughtful gift. They're the one who picked it out!

I was in a tailspin of confusion I hadn't experienced since the first time I heard George W. Bush speak.

I wrote to you for a year and you never wrote back. T
rang you over and over again and you would never come to the
phone. What part of that gives the impression that I didn’t care?
~Jonah Griggs

I wrote to you for a year and you never wrote back. I rang you over and over again and you would never come to the
phone. What part of that gives the impression that I didn’t care?
~Jonah Griggs

My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate.