Patience – A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.

Infidel, n. In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does.

Hash, x. There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.
Famous, adj. Conspicuously miserable.
Dictionary, n. A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.

Cynic, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are not as they ought to be.

Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner, confessedly unworthy.

Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills.