Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

Politics is the conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

PANDEMONIUM, n. Literally, the Place of All the Demons. Most of them have escaped into politics and finance, and the place is now used as a lecture hall by the Audible Reformer. When disturbed by his voice the ancient echoes clamor appropriate responses most gratifying to his pride of distinction.

INEXPEDIENT, adj. Not calculated to advance one's interests.

A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.

PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.