She searched for something to say, something that would make the world a little less dark and scary for him.
'Pop-Tart?' she offered.

You nicked-named my daughter after the Lock Ness Monster!

Life sucks, and then you die...

Hey, do you know what you call a blond with a brain?" I asked, and the continued on the same breath, "a golden retriever."
I've heard that one, too," she said, no longer smiling.
I'll keep trying." I promised.

Ew. Someone put the dog out, "Rosalie murmured wrinkling her nose.
Have you herd this one, Psycho?
how do a blond's brain cells die?"
She didn't say anything.
Well?" I asked."Do you know the punch line or not?"
She looked pointedly at the TV and ignored me.
Has she heard it?" I asked Edward.
No." He answered.
Awesome. So you'll enjoy this, bloodsucker--a blond's brain cells die alone.

What's so funny?" Bella mumbled.
"I got food in her hair," I told her, chortling again.
"I'm not going to forget this, dog," Rosalie hissed.
"S'not so hard to erase a blond's memory," I countered. "Just blow in her ear."
Get some new jokes, "Rosalie snapped.