Sister Mary chose that moment to come in with the tea. Satanist or not, she'd also found a plate and arranged some iced biscuits on it.

In 2010, the BBC spent nearly £230,000 on tea, but only £2000 on biscuits.

Honestly, if you're given the choice between Armageddon or tea, you don't say 'what kind of tea?

According to my daughters, my most irritating habit is asking for cups of tea.

No milk," I said.

"No milk," said my sister.

I watched my dad think about this. He looked like he was going to suggest that we have something for breakfast that you do not need milk for, like sausages, but then he looked like he remembered that, without milk, he couldn't have his tea. He had his "no tea" face.

"You poor children," he said. "I will walk down to the shop on the corner. I will get milk.

Hannah loved tea, although she sometimes wondered whether this was because of how well it went with cake and biscuits.