The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
Stephen Wright
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The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
STEVEN WRIGHT I feel like I've been in the Bermuda Triangle, missing time and missing experiences. This is the lon...
RON HIRST There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is...
BOB PHILLIPS Later that day I went back to the old turf-house door and drew back the ivy. There between the stone...
ALICE TAYLOR The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
LEMONY SNICKET My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again.
STEVEN ALEXANDER WRIGHT Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
FRANCIS PHARCELLUS CHURCH God is Santa Claus for Grown-Ups.
OLIVER MARKUS Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.
ALFRED E. SMITH Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.
ALFRED SMITH The only reason you'd want to own it is if you believe in Santa Claus.
JAMES FENKNER I've wanted to do something on the Bermuda Triangle since I was in high school.
DEAN DEVLIN He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook, when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly...
CLEMENT C. MOORE, LL.D. You know, in a way, 'Dear Santa Claus' is rather stuffy... Perhaps something a little more intimate ...
CHARLES M. SCHULZ Christmas present from Russian Santa Claus.
PAVEL DATSYUK God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat
HENRY LOUIS MENCKEN You've got three choices: the taxpayers, the companies or Santa Claus ... Theoretically, you could t...
DOUGLAS ELLIOTT It had been like discovering that Santa Claus was secretly a Nazi.
BRANDON SANDERSON Being a superpower is like being a Santa Claus that everyone hates.
JON STEWART It's called the Santa Claus effect, ... The holiday period is traditionally a strong cycle.
ANDREW BARRETT God wants your soul for all eternity. All Santa requires is cookies and milk... One night out of the...
PAUL HENDERSON Heck, I think they've even brought Santa Claus in.
BOB SCHLAG I believed in Santa Claus until I was 12!
DANIELLE DE NIESE I don't care if Santa Claus is the coach as long as we win.
JOHN MADDEN Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit everyone once a year.
Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year
VICTOR BORGE It's sort of like Santa Claus left a present under the tree for everybody and leaves it open to liti...
HEIDI MCINTOSH Santa is like a queen bee. All the elves are his drones, who exist to feed him royal jelly, which I ...
THOMM QUACKENBUSH Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven...
H. L. MENCKEN So, you're the Santa Claus of the magic world with a naughty and nice list?
ZOE FORWARD Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
VICTOR BORGE A good many things go around in the dark besides Santa Claus.
HERBERT HOOVER I sing about UFOs and extraterrestrials, and so I designed a UFO fashion. It includes science-fictio...
NINA HAGEN June and John were the folks who invited Santa and Mrs. Claus to the concert.
DORA MURRAY These issues should not be resolved with a Santa Claus yarmulke.
SHEILA GORDON I like to play Santa Claus for people; I like to cheer people up.
DELBERT TEILLE God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.
BIL KEANE I see no truth whatsoever in stories of extraterrestrial visitors, crop circles, the Bermuda Triangl...
DAN BROWN We're like their Santa Claus. It's kind of special and we make them feel normal.
ENRIQUE GARCIA I see Santa Claus and Joseph Smith and Luke Skywalker as the same person.
TREY PARKER This is the ultimate in feel-good projects. To make money and make people happy, it's a Santa Claus ...
CRAIG BELSER History is like Santa Claus: a language construction. We have some registers about the existence of ...
ALVARO ENRIGUE Would people please stop telling me Santa Claus doesn't exist? I met him when I was a kid, surrounde...
STEVE MERRICK, STEVESEVILEMPIRE Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
FRANCIS PHARCELLUS CHURCH Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for a...
SCOTT DIKKERS We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a...
ANDY ROONEY It's going to be cool, especially because of the warm weather -- true warm weather. There's real sun...
DAN HOWELL In the years since his murder, we have transformed King into a kind of innocuous black Santa Claus.
TIMOTHY B. TYSON The good news was that we’d found Santa. The bad news was that he was floating in a giant tube of ...
PHILLIP ANDREW BENNETT LOW I was staring at one of the most famous images of Santa Claus of all time — one by Thomas Nast, fr...
PHILLIP ANDREW BENNETT LOW On a busy day twenty-two thousand people come to visit Santa, and I was told that it is an elf's lot...
DAVID SEDARIS They would often pull on his beard and say he must be the real Santa Claus,
VAN ORDEN Of course, my Christmas is (so much more) gorgeous and romantic (than Germany's)!! And unlike the re...
HIDEKAZ HIMARUYA If SANTA CLAUS came down the chimney in a f**king jogging suit, you wouldn't even know it was him.
WAYNE COYNE Contemporary American children, if they are old enough to grasp the concept of Santa Claus by Thanks...
ROY BLOUNT, JR. Contemporary American children, if they are old enough to grasp the concept of Santa Claus by Thanks...
ROY BLOUNT JR. They would have booed Santa Claus in there if he had the hide to advocate a No vote.
HENRY MORRIS If Santa Claus was a politician, he would only put billboards promising the best Christmas presents.
LJUPKA CVETANOVA Just like Santa Claus, a farmer works all year on a commodity, and at the end of the year he gives i...
RONALD DAWSON One of the problems we have in this country is that too many adults believe in Santa Claus, and too ...
LEE LAUER They err who thinks Santa Claus comes down through the chimney; he really enters through the heart."
MRS. PAUL M. ELL. The other day I bumped into Santa Claus. A good bump it was, too! I ought to have been arrested, for...
HALFORD E. LUCCOCK Our life is a series of moments. Let them all go. Moments. All gathering towards this one.
NOW IS GOOD Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it - Santa Claus was a man, therefore God has t...
PATTI SMITH Having in our childhood felt primal awe for the spectacle of the holiday, we are told to age into fe...
THOMM QUACKENBUSH We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we ...
KAREN ARMSTRONG Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist....
ARLO GUTHRIE We've been in a six-week pattern of warm temperatures, which is a normal span. Now, we're entering a...
ALEX SOSNOWSKI I'm more of a seafood guy. If they had a Lobster Bowl I might be looking like Santa Claus.
JONATHAN SCOTT When people do think about it is when the warm weather hits and it's too late. But it's not too late...
JANET CANGEMI When I was 21 years old, I had a job playing Santa Claus in a shopping centre in Sacramento. I was r...
TOM HANKS I am strong, but I am tired, Stephen, tired of always having to be the strong one, of always having ...
BRENDA JOYCE There was a strange happening during a performance of Elgar's 'Sea Pictures' at a concer...
RONNIE BARKER I'm concerned about my daughter because she will not believe in Santa Claus. No matter what I sa...
SALMA HAYEK The people we've got now, they're tired of losing. They've got the winning mentality now.
ALEX NEAL I think we're still going to get a bit of a Santa Claus rally. But I'm not sure how substantial it's...
TOM SCHRADER The jolly old elf’s nose was red, but not from cold — rather, from the brutality of a dozen boxe...
PHILLIP ANDREW BENNETT LOW 1. Santa Claus is real. However, your parents are folkloric constructs meant to protect and foritfy ...
CATHERYNNE M. VALENTE On Christmas. "Santa Claus represents God on assistance," said Clyde.
"Santa Claus...
MILTON ROKEACH No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace, is going to s...
ALFRED SMITH No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace, is going to s...
AL SMITH No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace, is going to s...
ALFRED E. SMITH The Santa Claus rally is clearly underway. I expect to see the bulls carry the averages to new 4 1/2...
MARC PADO Express mail is always available, and we deliver on Christmas Day. The carriers dress up like Santa ...
BRENDA RYANS On Christmas morning, my Mam and Dad were downstairs shouting to me to look out the window.
T...
STEPHEN RICHARDS The market is reacting to speculation over a Santa Claus rally that didn't happen. So players are go...
SERGIO GARCIA We had a warm start to the winter but now it is starting to look a bit ugly. The focus will be on co...
CRAIG PENNINGTON When I was a kid, I believed in Santa Claus. But it was very tough because in the Dominican... there...
ALFONSO SORIANO So you say there is no Father Christmas, ...
M.C. FRANK If you ever have to steal money from your kid, and later on he discovers it's gone, I think a good t...
JACK HANDY The biggest issue will be getting good, warm weather to apply it.
BRUCE BARRETT My wife and I got to go onstage at a Flaming Lips concert at Webster Hall once. We dressed up like S...
BILL HADER A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's stil...
JAMES G. COZZENS A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's sti...
JAMES G. COZZENS A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's stil...
J. G. COZZENS I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after d...
DICK GREGORY Numbers are down because of the warm weather, but the snow is great.
JAMIE STAFNE I just feel like we've got it now. We got a little of what we were missing.
ALAN ZEMAITIS I had this grand idea that Elvira's kind of the Santa Claus of Halloween - at the malls, you'...
CASSANDRA PETERSON It's going to be cool cause it will be warm weather.
BRITTANY DANIEL
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ALAN WRIGHT Man has been adjudged a social animal.
FRANCES WRIGHT Religion may be defined thus: a belief in, and homage rendered to, existences unseen and causes unkn...
FRANCES WRIGHT If they exert it not for good, they will for evil; if they advance not knowledge, they will perpetua...
FRANCES WRIGHT Pets, like their owners, tend to expand a little over the Christmas period.
FRANCES WRIGHT Look into the nature of things. Search out the grounds of your opinions, the for and against.
FRANCES WRIGHT It will appear evident upon attentive consideration that equality of intellectual and physical advan...
FRANCES WRIGHT He who lives in the single exercise of his mental faculties, however usefully or curiously directed,...
FRANCES WRIGHT The sciences have ever been the surest guides to virtue.
FRANCES WRIGHT It is in vain that we would circumscribe the power of one half of our race, and that half by far the...
FRANCES WRIGHT