The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.


Kinky Friedman

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The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.
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I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.
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The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'
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I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes...
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I don't remember the first half of my life. All I say is a happy childhood is the worst possible...
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Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, b...
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I don't apologize to people who try to intimidate.
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How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design?
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I don't apologize to people with an agenda.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
May the God of your choice bless and keep you. I respect Him as long as He does not circumcise me an...
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Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.
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If Willie Nelson had been Rosa Parks, there never would have been a civil rights movement in this co...
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I never apologize for the truth. And the truth here is that racists come in many different colors.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never ...
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The only currency I value is the coin of the spirit. That's very important in my life.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
You struggle with your demons and you conquer them.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I've always said money may buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
A happy childhood... is the worst possible preparation for life.
KINKY FRIEDMAN

More Kinky Friedman

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
KINKY FRIEDMAN
The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
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The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'
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I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes...
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Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, b...
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I don't apologize to people who try to intimidate.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design?
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I don't apologize to people with an agenda.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
May the God of your choice bless and keep you. I respect Him as long as He does not circumcise me an...
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Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.
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The only currency I value is the coin of the spirit. That's very important in my life.
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I've always said money may buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail.
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I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.
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I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.
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Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.
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You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.
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I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn'...
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We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like...
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William Bennett is my patron saint, one of them. Redd Foxx is another.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
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Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independen...
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When I'm governor... I'll be the first governor with a listed telephone number.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
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The only thing wrong with Southern Baptists was they didn't hold them underwater long enough.
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Why the Hell Not?
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Remember, I'm not running against Rick Perry; I'm running against apathy,
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Friday night was the night most people thought they were supposed to have fun. Trouble was most peop...
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Remember, the Legislature is the joke, not our campaign, ... I think we've got a real, real shot.
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I'm a gambler, and now I'm betting on Texas,
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But believe me, we can win this thing with a big turnout. And Rick Perry knows it. That's what the J...
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I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't ho...
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If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!
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Whatever we're going to do, we're going to make it fun.
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This is really happening. It isn't a dream, or maybe it is, but it's one long, long overdue.
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I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain
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Always beware of people offering you one-time money. That only works in an election year. How are yo...
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One eye is laughing and one eye is crying. And the eye that is crying is because this governor has b...
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How sad for him to be hoping for a small turnout.
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Our people are going to be with us, and her people are going to be with her, and there's plenty of t...
KINKY FRIEDMAN
It's not a slam dunk.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I admit I was drinking a Guinness . . . but I did not swallow.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I don't see how the people who created the problem can fix it. Texas is worth fighting for, and the ...
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
This is a bad idea. It's like having Dubai run the ports of America. It means we'll be paying tolls ...
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I've always said that this campaign is running on the coin of the spirit. I've also said a journey o...
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I've always thought that she was pretty spunky. I like her spirit.
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Many of us feel that the soul of Texas may be riding on this campaign. I would dearly love to be num...
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Texas can lead the country. We won't be slaves to the Middle East.
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The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'
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Jesse is a virtual gold mine of information. He's been through the fire. He knows what works and doe...
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There will be a whole new spirit blowing through Texas. There will be a smile on everybody's face an...
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I have a better head of hair than Rick Perry; it's just not in a place I can show you.
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People are drooling for the truth. They want honesty from politicians, and they're not getting it.
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It seems to me the governor has just discovered we have a border.
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They would need that to compare to the sample to make sure it doesn't belong to the victim.
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Concentrated power is not rendered harmless by the good intentions of those who create it.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The power to do good is also the power to do harm.
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We share need, not-human. Yours is straightforward.” … “Mine is less so, but you will serve it...
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Only in summer-phase is it carnivorous.”

If there was an award for understatement, I th...
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The Tyr had tried. It had really tried. It must have gone over every element of human psychology, tr...
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Life is the messy bits.
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The economic miracle that has been the United States was not produced by socialized enterprises, by ...
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The great virtue of free enterprise is that it forces existing businesses to meet the test of the ma...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Governments never learn. Only people learn.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Many people want the government to protect the consumer. A much more urgent problem is to protect th...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
A major source of objection to a free economy is precisely that group thinks they ought to want. Und...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Income tax time is when you test your powers of deduction.
SHELBY FRIEDMAN
Consider Social Security. The young have always contributed to the support of the old. Earlier, the ...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
If even a small fraction of the money we now spend on trying to enforce drug prohibition were devote...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Inflation is the one form of taxation that can be imposed without legislation.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Nowadays, a penny saved is ridiculous!
SHELBY FRIEDMAN
There was a time when we the U.S. had completely unrestricted immigration, when anybody could come t...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
What kind of society isn't structured on greed? The problem of social organization is how to set up ...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Never try to walk across a river just because it has an average depth of four feet.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
What does it mean to say that government might have a responsibility? Government can't have a respon...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
History suggests that capitalism is a necessary condition for political freedom
MILTON FRIEDMAN
An unhurried sense of time is in itself a form of wealth.
BONNIE FRIEDMAN
A slut is someone, usually a woman, who’s stepped outside of the very narrow lane that good girls ...
JACLYN FRIEDMAN
The greatest advances of civilization, whether in architecture or painting, in science and literatur...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
We definitely are a supporter of lowering corporate income tax and managing through the reprehension...
ADENA FRIEDMAN
Golf has an ambivalent relationship with the environment. On one hand, it's a great preserver of...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Al Qaeda is nothing more than a mutant supply chain. They're playing off the same platform as Wa...
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When I was growing up, my parents told me, 'Finish your dinner. People in China and India are st...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
The historical debate is over. The answer is free-market capitalism.
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Whatever you may be thinking when you apply for a job today, you can be sure the employer is asking ...
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I was in Bangalore, India, the Silicon Valley of India, when I realized that the world was flat.
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I'm a capitalist. I believe in capitalism. But capitalism only works if you have safety nets to ...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
The Dell Theory of Conflict Prevention argues that no two countries that are both part of the same g...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Nature is regulating our climate for free. Mother Nature, she's been doing that for free, for a ...
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There is nothing more valuable than great classroom instruction. But let's stop putting the whol...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
You win the presidency by connecting with the American people's gut insecurities and aspirations...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
By 'flat' I did not mean that the world is getting equal. I said that more people in more pl...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Several technological and political forces have converged, and that has produced a global, Web-enabl...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Supply chains cannot tolerate even 24 hours of disruption. So if you lose your place in the supply c...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Optimists are usually wrong. But all the great change in history, positive change, was done by optim...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
There is no substitute for face-to-face reporting and research.
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
I basically did all the library research for this book on Google, and it not only saved me enormous ...
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The country that owns green, that dominates that industry, is going to have the most energy security...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
I can see a day soon where you'll create your own college degree by taking the best online cours...
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Natural gas emits only half the carbon dioxide of coal when burned, but if methane leaks when oil co...
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Do you know what my favorite renewable fuel is? An ecosystem for innovation.
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America still has the right stuff to thrive. We still have the most creative, diverse, innovative cu...
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Entrepreneurs don't write a 100-page business plan and execute it one time; they're always e...
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I'm not totally altruistic. I've always had great career ambitions. But it has to come out i...
DAVID FRIEDMAN
So that the record of history is absolutely crystal clear. That there is no alternative way, so far ...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
There's no question that a great teacher can make a huge difference in a student's achieveme...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
There's no such thing as a free lunch.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Starting a new job can be nerve-racking , but it's also exciting. You're embarking on a new ...
ADENA FRIEDMAN
The only relevant test of the validity of a hypothesis is comparison of prediction with experience.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The only way that has ever been discovered to have a lot of people cooperate together voluntarily is...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Government has three primary functions. It should provide for military defense of the nation. It sho...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The black market was a way of getting around government controls. It was a way of enabling the free ...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
I think that the Internet is going to be one of the major forces for reducing the role of government...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
When government - in pursuit of good intentions - tries to rearrange the economy, legislate morality...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The Great Depression, like most other periods of severe unemployment, was produced by government mis...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
History suggests that capitalism is a necessary condition for political freedom. Clearly it is not a...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
I'm in favor of legalizing drugs. According to my values system, if people want to kill themselv...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The most important ways in which I think the Internet will affect the big issue is that it will make...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Nothing is so permanent as a temporary government program.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
We have a system that increasingly taxes work and subsidizes nonwork.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
I am favor of cutting taxes under any circumstances and for any excuse, for any reason, whenever it&...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Most economic fallacies derive from the tendency to assume that there is a fixed pie, that one party...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Most of the energy of political work is devoted to correcting the effects of mismanagement of govern...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shorta...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Inflation is taxation without legislation.
MILTON FRIEDMAN
I don't care what people say about how I look or even their opinion on my relationship. But the mome...
RACHELLE FRIEDMAN
We're counting on him to be a productive member of our bullpen.
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
We'll continue talks with [them]. This doesn't necessarily shut the door on their future with the Ra...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
We're happy to come to terms with Toby. He's an instrumental part of what we're trying to do as we d...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
We're getting really close to obtaining the support we need.
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
He understands what it takes to make a team successful.
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
Convoys are the scariest and most high-risk activity a soldier can participate in. You never know wh...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
As plastic surgeons, we use our general surgery training to help treat initial trauma in the field t...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
Don't Try This At Home: Culinary Catastrophes from the World's Greatest Chefs
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
We were seeing situations when, even after they reported hazardous conditions and violations were is...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
This is a classic change-of-scenery trade involving two former No. 1 draft picks that are still youn...
ANDREW FRIEDMAN
Reed: "I owe you big-time, Ronnie."
Ronnie: "You've been my best friend since kindergarten, Ree...
ROBIN FRIEDMAN
There's nothing like living a little close to the edge that gets you motivated to ensure that yo...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
In Globalization 1.0, which began around 1492, the world went from size large to size medium. In Glo...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
Universities exist to transmit knowledge and understanding of ideas and values to students not to pr...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The world runs on individuals pursuing their self interests. The great achievements of civilization ...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
The problem of social organization is how to set up an arrangement under which greed will do the lea...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
Indeed, a major source of objection to a free economy is precisely that it... gives people what they...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
And what does reward virtue? You think the communist commissar rewards virtue? You think a Hitler re...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
When I wrote 'The World Is Flat,' I said the world is flat. Yeah, we're all connected. F...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
We are led by lawyers who do not understand either technology or balance sheets.
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
You take one bomber and deploy him in Baghdad, and another is manufactured in Riyadh the next day. I...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless bo...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
No matter where I go - London, Beirut, Jerusalem, Washington, Beijing, or Bangalore - I'm always...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's friend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are just...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind and ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
The most important thing about a TV set is to get it back against something and not out in the middl...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind and ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
If it's a cliche to say that intellectual curiosity keeps your mind sharp, your senses alert, an...
ADENA FRIEDMAN
I didn't see your backbone. I felt like you were sleeping though the lyrical dance.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
It allows your car to run on straight vegetable oil just the same way you would on diesel, with very...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
I knew once one person had one, their friend would get one, and their neighbor would get one and it ...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
To be honest, I never wanted to live in L.A.. I like this area, but L.A.'s a pit, sorry. I'm from Sa...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
They were getting progressively violent.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
Your fox trot is the smoothest I've seen yet.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
It's not a hippie experiment anymore, ... It actually works and it works really well.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
The more Israel sinks into the West Bank, the more it is delegitimized and isolated, the more the wo...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN