The first two years are years of adjustment. And typically a pattern is set for the rest of the marriage.

We all bring issues, traditions and rituals from our families of origin. Couples must figure out what to keep and what to discard as they create a new union and blend their expectations.

The married couples that seem to be successful in making love last are those that have a high regard and respect for each other. And they are intentional about nurturing the marital friendship.

My advice in a nutshell is to learn to forgive one another. And keep nurturing the marital friendship as you would any other meaningful friendship. I like to think that the definition of marriage is a lifelong partnership in which you have a consistent witness to the 'stuff' of your life.

Make time to go off together and be alone without the kids. The marital relationship is the primary relationship in the home. Children will feel most secure when they know Mom and Dad are secure.

If a man contributes fairly it seems to have a lot of ramifications for the rest of the marriage.