The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is an indispensable companion to all those who are keen to make sense of life in an infinitely complex and confusing Universe, for though it cannot hope to be useful or informative on all matters, it does at least make the reassuring claim, that where it is inaccurate it is at least definitively inaccurate. In cases of major discrepancy it's always reality that's got it wrong.

This was the gist of the notice. It said "The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate."

This has led to some interesting consequences. For instance, when the Editors of the Guide were sued by the families of those who had died as a result of taking the entry on the planet Tralal literally (it said "Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts often make a very good meal for visiting tourists: instead of "Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts often make a very good meal of visiting tourists"), they claimed that the first version of the sentence was the more aesthetically pleasing, summoned a qualified poet to testify under oath that beauty was truth, truth beauty and hoped thereby to prove that the guilty party in this case was Life itself for failing to be either beautiful or true. The judges concurred, and in a moving speech held that Life itself was in contempt of court, and duly confiscated it from all those there present before going off to enjoy a pleasant evening's ultragolf.


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Sir Isaac Newton, renowned inventor of the milled-edge coin and the catflap!"

"The what?"...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I co...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
It is difficult to be sat on all day, every day, by some other creature, without forming an opinion ...
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The Electric Monk was a labour-saving device, like a dishwasher or a video recorder... Electric Monk...
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The more Susan waited, the more the doorbell didn't ring. Or the phone.
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If the Universe came to an end every time there was some uncertainty about what had happened in it, ...
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Sherlock Holmes observed that once you have eliminated the impossible then whatever remains, however...
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The door was the way to... to... The Door was The Way. Good. Capital letters were always the best wa...
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Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable its...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
Cyberspace is - or can be - a good, friendly and egalitarian place to meet.
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A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the s...
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First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with AS...
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We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.
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The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind...
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The Ultimate Answer to Life, The Universe and Everything is...42!
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The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
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Wandering around the web is like living in a world in which every doorway is actually one of those s...
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Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you ...
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I taught myself to play the guitar by listening to Paul Simon records, working it out note by note. ...
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I love deadlines. I love the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
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Life? Don't talk to me about life!
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The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angr...
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The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
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The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss
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Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
The second worst is that of the Az...
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Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?
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In fact there was only one species on the planet more intelligent than dolphins, and they spent a lo...
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Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy...
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The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a dou...
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O Deep Thought computer," he said, "the task we have designed you to perform is this. We want you to...
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Man has always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much......
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The Answer to the Great Question Of.....Life, the Universe and Everything.....(is) Forty-two.
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The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.
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One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit o...
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Even he, to whom most things that most people would think were pretty smart were pretty dumb, though...
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The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong i...
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Ah, this is obviously some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of.
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Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys ...
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The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sen...
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Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have...
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It is no coincidence that in no known language does the phrase 'As pretty as an Airport' appear.
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In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and...
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Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.
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He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was...
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Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of...
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Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existenc...
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The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola
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Even traveling despondently is better than arriving here.
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The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a...
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My doctor says that I have a malformed public duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre,' h...
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Same as you, Arthur. I hitched a ride. After all, with a degree in maths and another in astrophysics...
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He actually caught himself saying things like "Yippee," as he pranced ridiculously round the house.
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