The mountain sheep are sweeter, But the valley sheep are fatter. We therefore deemed it meeter To carry off the latter. - Thomas Love Peacock,

My steps have pressed the flowers, That to the Muses' bowers The eternal dews of Helicon have given: And trod the mountain height, Where Science, young and bright, Scans with poetic gaze the midnight-heaven. Yet have I found no power to vie With thine, severe necessity!

I never failed to convince an audience that the best thing they could do was to go away.

I almost think it is the ultimate destiny of science to exterminate the human race

Marriage may often be a stormy lake, but celibacy is almost always a muddy horse pond

There are two reasons for drinking: one is, when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it.