The pursuit of happiness belongs to us, but we must climb around or over the church to get it

I might resume the habit of going to church if the preacher would be honest enough to stand up some morning and say, "Perhaps next Sunday, but not today," and then sit down

Repartee is what you wish you'd said

The most casual examination will reveal the fact that all the jokes about the horrible results of masculine cooking and sewing are written by men. It is all part of a great scheme of sex propaganda.

A liberal is a man who leaves the room when the fight starts.

I doubt whether the world holds for any one a more soul-stirring surprise than the first adventure with ice cream