The thing I like most about dogs is their absolute belief in their own innocence, even when they've been caught redhanded. No matter what they've been doing, every bad dog bears the same look when scolded: "What?"

You can say you're getting in a little too late when the newspaper is already at your door by the time you get to your room, ... Obviously, it's not the most beneficial situation. You'd like to get in at a decent hour and catch some decent sleep as opposed to getting in, sleeping and going to the park when you wake up.

I don't want to sit here and make up excuses because that's really tired when that happens,

My dog is half pit-bull, half poodle. Not much of a watchdog, but a vicious gossip!

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.

I seen a lot of kids getting hit, (and) dogs. They know we need a crosswalk there. It ain't hard to put two stripes down.