There are books that speak to us of our own lives with a clarity we cannot match. They prevent the morose suspicion that we do not fully belong to the species, that we lie beyond comprehension. Our embarrassments, our sulks, our envy, our feelings of guilt, these phenomena are conveyed in Austen in a way that affords us bursts of almost magical self-recognition. The author has located words to depict a situation we thought ourselves alone in feeling, and for a few moments, we see ourselves more clearly and wish to become whom the author would have wanted us to be.
Alain de Botton
Related Living in the box means being convinced that other people and our circumstances are responsible for ... C. TERRY WARNER We attribute to ourselves qualities that we do not possess because if we possessed them, our lives w... LAURA KNIGHT JADCZYK Most of us are not raised to actively encounter our destiny. We may not know that we have one. As ch... JULIA CAMERON When we are really honest with ourselves we must admit our lives are all that really belong to us. S... CESAR CHAVEZ The search for a God of our own understanding is one of the most important efforts we will undertake... NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS All people are, at heart, egocentric. We exist at the center of our own little universes. We believe... PETER DAVID If we all look at life we think how nice, then we look at death and everybody goes oh you can say th... GARY F EVANS... Anger is a tool for change when it challenges us to become more of an expert on the self and less of... HARRIET GOLDHOR LERNER Most of us think we're too busy or too important to rest for a day. CRAIG GROESCHEL If we're honest with ourselves, most of us know the one thing we lack. CRAIG GROESCHEL It's a lie to think that you are not good enough. It's a lie to think that you are not beautiful. It... DISON ARNIBAL When it's clear that we have a commitment to God that comes before anything else in our lives, most ... CRAIG GROESCHEL Many of us learned that keeping busy…kept us at a distance from our feelings...Some of us took the... MAUREEN BRADY When reacting with even the most subtle of mannerisms, in a way that does not represent ourselves as... REUBEN LOWE But even a vessel pulsates, beats and pumps in ecstasy and in rage! I wonder are the way ... QUIETSTORMPOET It is in moments of illness that we are compelled to recognize that we live not alone but chained to... MARCEL PROUST We must become so alone, so utterly alone, that we withdraw into our innermost self. It is a way of ... HERMANN HESSE Each of us views life through a different lens. What we think is colored by the baggage we carry, an... LAURIE BUCHANAN, PHD Our Christian destiny is, in fact, a great one: but we cannot achieve greatness unless we lose all i... THOMAS MERTON Feeling compassion for ourselves in no way releases us from responsibility for our actions. Rather, ... TARA BRACH Our Father, who has set a restlessness in our hearts and made us all seekers after that which we can... ELEANOR ROOSEVELT Most of us are at war with ourselves, are our own worst enemies. We expect a great deal of ourselves... ORISON SWETT MARDEN In the end, we forget the details of our lives that embarrass us or are too painful. We just lie bac... PATRICK MODIANO We often have need of a profound philosophy to restore to our feelings their original state of innoc... G. C. (GEORG CHRISTOPH) LICHTENBERG 35. God is entitled to a portion of our income—not because He needs it but because we need to give... JAMES C. DOBSON Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond meas... MARYANNE WILLIAMSON A couple of customers interrupted [...] who wanted to know if we had some YA book about ants and ali... SHAUN DAVID HUTCHINSON There is a lot of negativity and bad habits that just need to be cut out of our lives. Sometimes we ... S.R. CRAWFORD . . . [O]nce we begin to feel deeply all the aspects of our lives, we begin to demand from ourselves... AUDRE LORDE God put you on earth with a divine assignment- something prepared in advance for you to do. I've fou... CRAIG GROESCHEL Third-level, life-long relationships are generally few because “their existence implies that those... MARIANNE WILLIAMSON Never let us be discouraged with ourselves; it is not when we are conscious of our faults that we ar... FRANÇOIS FÉNÉLON Destiny consist in the moments that we experienced, and not in the choices we have to do. DANIEL MELGAçO We are excited to have successfully refinanced our capital structure. This will allow us to capitali... HOWARD BERGER We cannot live for ourselves alone. Our lives are connected by a thousand invisible threads, and alo... HENRY MELVILL We cannot live for ourselves alone. Our lives are connected by a thousand invisible threads, and alo... HERMAN MELVILLE The search for meaning in our lives takes us on paths large and small. When we go beyond ourselves-w... ALEX PATTAKOS As we experience this love, there is a temptation at times to become hostile to our earlier understa... ROB BELL We've always defined ourselves by the ability to overcome the impossible. And we count these moments... COOPER - INTERSTELLAR The answer isn't more time but a greater awareness of the time we have. CRAIG GROESCHEL The words that strike us are those that awake an echo in a zone we have already made our own—the p... CESARE PAVESE We are the people of the book. We love our books. We fill our houses with books. We treasure books w... CORY DOCTOROW It's in the morning, for most of us. It's that time, those few seconds when we're coming out of slee... JERRY SPINELLI We learn that our spirit is not apart from us; it is a part of us. We gain awareness of the exact na... NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS [...]we must ask ourselves whether we have not often been deceiving ourselves with our confession of... DIETRICH BONHOEFFER Our key to greatness lies not in our ability to project ourselves to others as if we are putting our... C. JOYBELL C. The opportunity to tell our story unhindered, uninterrupted is rare. Most of the time people are so ... JEANNETTE A. BAKKE Why is it that it is often easier for us to confess our sins to God than to a brother? God is holy a... DIETRICH BONHOEFFER We are responsible for what we are, and whatever we wish ourselves to be, we have the power to make ... SWAMI VIVEKANANDA I’m forcing us both to confront the fact that one of our most beautiful dreams was a lie. We both ... CLAUDIA GRAY Were it possible for us to see further than our knowledge reaches, and yet a little way beyond the o... RAINER MARIA RILKE Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond meas... MARIANNE WILLIAMSON It is therefore of supreme importance that we consent to live not for ourselves but for others. When... THOMAS MERTON Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond meas... MARIANNE WILLIAMSON Many of us fight for and boast our freedom of what is ultimately the ability to prove ourselves to o... CRISS JAMI It is good to see ourselves as others see us. Try as we may. We are never able to know ourselves ful... MOHANDAS GANDHI They are, as it were, train-bearers in the pageant of life, and hold a glass up to humanity, frailer... WILLIAM HAZLITT We are born into a world that is much bigger than ourselves, one that is both enormously frightening... KATARINA CLAIRE ENGLAND ROSS I thank God for schools that are serious about the gospel of Jesus Christ. They are vital to perpetu... JAMES C. DOBSON Humility has nothing to do with depreciating ourselves and our gifts in ways we know to be untrue. E... DAVID F. WELLS Traveling through the world produces a marvelous clarity in the judgment of men. We are all of us co... MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond meas... MARIANNE WILLIAMSON we unwittingly project onto God our own attitudes and feelings toward ourselves... But we cannot ass... BRENNAN MANNING So, tomorrow, I'm leaving. And I'm not going to let that happen again with anyone else. I'm going to... STEPHEN CHBOSKY Where did feelings go when they disappeared? Did they leave a chemical trace somewhere in our minds,... EVELYN LAU Some of us may just, in one-on-one conversations with our family, with our friends, over the back fe... PATRICIA IRELAND When clouds will become heavier than the land in us led our entire life by the steps of our Destiny,... SORIN CERIN If we choose only to expose ourselves to opinions and viewpoints that are in line to our own, we bec... BARACK OBAMA Close friends are truly life's treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With... VINCENT VAN GOGH We build our technologies as a way of addressing all our anxieties and desires. They are our passion... RICHARD POWERS We made a promise to ourselves at the beginning of the process that we weren't going to put any of o... PETER JACKSON Into God's hands let us now -- for the coming year, and for all the years of time, and for Eternity ... EDWARD B. PUSEY Even if our survival skills have become impediments we would like to let go of because they have cea... MAUREEN BRADY We are accountable only to ourselves for what happens to us in our lives. MILDRED NEWMAN When we first begin to take power more directly, after long having kept our relationship to it under... MAUREEN BRADY By simplifying our lives, we rediscover our child-like stalk of innocents that reconnects us with th... KILROY J. OLDSTER We are spirit children of a loving Heavenly Father who placed us in mortality to see if we would cho... HENRY B. EYRING Sometimes we just need somebody to show us something that we don't see ourselves, and our lives woul... ROSE B MASHIGO Who are we? Where do we come from? Why are we this way and not some other? What does it mean to be h... DR. CARL SAGAN A fine line exists between quitting on ourselves and letting go of a restrictive position in life an... KILROY J. OLDSTER All we have to believe with is our senses, the tools we use to perceive the world: our sight, our to... NEIL GAIMAN We do not want to rule alone (even if) we win a majority. We favor a coalition. There are many compl... GHAZI HAMAD Yes. He argued that we are the gods, that we create our own destiny. That what we are determines wha... GLEN COOK In order for us to practice self-control, we must have a goal. We must have something we are saying ... DANNY SILK We are all longing to go home to some place we have never been — a place half-remembered and half-... STARHAWK we sat there smoking cigarettes at 5 in the morning. CHARLES BUKOWSKI Everything - our houses, our clothes, our hairstyles - is meant to help us forget ourselves and to p... VERONICA ROTH Twenty or thirty years ago, in the army, we had a lot of obscure adventures, and years later we tell... VACLAV HAVEL We may claim to believe in God, but we don't want to believe so much that it makes us different. CRAIG GROESCHEL We could scrub the floor for a tired friend, or dress a wound for a patient in a hospital, or lay th... CARYLL HOUSELANDER Because we feel ourselves to be separate from the world in which we live, we have also grown to feel... JOSEPH P. KAUFFMAN The more we listen to the voices of others, voices unlike our own, the more we remain open to the tr... CHRIS HEDGES Every relationship that we have in our lives - our contact with each person, place, and event - serv... GUY FINLEY Food Allergies Are Not Due to Food, Rather Are Due to the Constant Contamination of That Food That Y... THEHEALTHFOODGURU For us, then, life is a confidence trick we must run on ourselves, hoping we do not catch on to any ... THOMAS LIGOTTI Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond meas... MARIANNE WILLIAMSON This oath is the oath we all swear. Not to a god, or a master, or to the Ludu Achillea...but to our ... LESLEY LIVINGSTON Truth is always stranger than fiction. We craft fiction to match our sense of how things ought to be... DEAN KOONTZ Orion is above the horizon now, and near it Jupiter, brighter than it will ever be ... But i expect ... THOMAS HARRIS Even though some individual scholars try to tell us there is no direct connection between images of ... BELL HOOKS
More Alain de Botton
Pick up any newspaper or magazine, open the TV, and you'll be bombarded with suggestions of how ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Atheism is having a heyday in the born-again United States. ALAIN DE BOTTON What bothers me is that there is so much emphasis on food, rather than gathering and meeting - so th... ALAIN DE BOTTON Though it may feel otherwise, enjoying life is no more dangerous than apprehending it with continuou... ALAIN DE BOTTON One rarely falls in love without being as much attracted to what is interestingly wrong with someone... ALAIN DE BOTTON We read the weird tales in newspapers to crowd out the even weirder stuff inside us. ALAIN DE BOTTON There's a whole category of people who miss out by not allowing themselves to be weird enough. ALAIN DE BOTTON Intimacy is the capacity to be rather weird with someone - and finding that that's ok with them. ALAIN DE BOTTON The more familiar two people become, the more the language they speak together departs from that of ... ALAIN DE BOTTON ...if the beginnings of love and amorous politics are equally rosy, then the ends may be equally blo... ALAIN DE BOTTON In the works of Lucretius, we find two reasons why we shouldn ALAIN DE BOTTON The longing for a destiny is no nowhere stronger than in our romantic life. All too often forced to ... ALAIN DE BOTTON He did not mean to depress us, rather to free us from expectations which inspire bitterness. It is c... ALAIN DE BOTTON At the top of the slope on the perimeter of the site, overlooking six lanes of motorway, is a diner ... ALAIN DE BOTTON I was an incredibly lonely, very alienated teenager. ALAIN DE BOTTON I am not a foodie, thank goodness. I will eat pretty much anything. A lot of my friends are getting ... ALAIN DE BOTTON There is militaristic-hegemonic-plutocratic side of the U.S. which is getting out of hand and threat... ALAIN DE BOTTON It's almost a blessing when we meet people who naturally want to do the sort of things that are ... ALAIN DE BOTTON It's very hard to respect people on holiday - everybody looks so silly at the beach, it makes yo... ALAIN DE BOTTON Small issues are really just large ones that haven't been accorded the requisite attention. ALAIN DE BOTTON Fantasies can be great, but we shouldn't make the wedding a fantasy, because the wedding is the ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Most of the time, we make discoveries about how difficult people are at the moment when the difficul... ALAIN DE BOTTON The thing is that love gives us a ringside seat on somebody else's flaws, so of course you'r... ALAIN DE BOTTON I'm one of those introverted people who simply feels a lot better after spending time alone thin... ALAIN DE BOTTON My dad was a slightly stricter version of Richard Dawkins. The worldview was that there are idiots o... ALAIN DE BOTTON Laughter is an important part of a good relationship. It's an immense achievement when you can m... ALAIN DE BOTTON The materialistic view of happiness of our age starkly revealed in our understanding of the word "lu... ALAIN DE BOTTON We tend to think of philosophies as produced by professional philosophers. Traditionally, this has m... ALAIN DE BOTTON The romantic person instinctively sees marriage in terms of emotions, but what a couple actually get... ALAIN DE BOTTON Not being understood may be taken as a sign that there is much in one to understand. ALAIN DE BOTTON What makes people good communicators is, in essence, an ability not to be fazed by the more problema... ALAIN DE BOTTON A world where a majority had imbibed the lessons implicit within tragic art would be one in which th... ALAIN DE BOTTON Parents don't reveal how often they have bitten their tongue, fought back the tears, or been too... ALAIN DE BOTTON We each appear to hold within ourselves a range of divergent views as to our native qualities.. And ... ALAIN DE BOTTON The humanities have been forced to disguise, both from themselves and their students, why their subj... ALAIN DE BOTTON I assemble my ideas in pieces on a computer file, then gradually find a place for them on a piece of... ALAIN DE BOTTON Sometimes my biography is interpreted as the upbringing of a French aristocrat. It was very, very di... ALAIN DE BOTTON Cynics are - beneath it all - only idealists with awkwardly high standards. ALAIN DE BOTTON The more people you have to ask for permission, the more dangerous a project gets. ALAIN DE BOTTON What annoys me about most self-help books is that they have no tragic sense. They have no sense that... ALAIN DE BOTTON The arrogance that says analysing the relationship between reasons and causes is more important than... ALAIN DE BOTTON I passionately believe that's it's not just what you say that counts, it's also how you ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Forgiveness requires a sense that bad behaviour is a sign of suffering rather than malice. ALAIN DE BOTTON The start receives such disproportionate attention because it isn't deemed to be just one phase amon... ALAIN DE BOTTON Feeling lost, crazy and desperate belongs to a good life as much as optimism, certainty and reason. ALAIN DE BOTTON If you are pro love, you have to be a little bit disloyal to the romantic feelings that propel you i... ALAIN DE BOTTON The number one person who needs my books is me. I'm not some sort of disinterested guru who has ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Parents become very good at not hearing the explicit words and listening instead to what the child m... ALAIN DE BOTTON Secular thinkers have a separation between thinking and doing. They don't have a grasp of the ba... ALAIN DE BOTTON The pleasure we derive from journeys is perhaps dependent more on the mindset with which we travel t... ALAIN DE BOTTON I waste most of the day, then finally start to write around 3 P.M., totally disgusted with myself fo... ALAIN DE BOTTON We have to put aside the customary historical reading of works of art in order to invite art to resp... ALAIN DE BOTTON I remember going to university, and the people who'd left home for the first time looked at the ... ALAIN DE BOTTON The moment we cry in a film is not when things are sad but when they turn out to be more beautiful t... ALAIN DE BOTTON Everyone's more vulnerable than they seem, and I think men are more vulnerable. Once you get clo... ALAIN DE BOTTON At 'The School of Life', we take seriously anything that has to do with human fulfilment - a... ALAIN DE BOTTON A city like London is sociable in a sense that there are people gathering in bars and restaurants, c... ALAIN DE BOTTON I was foreign and Jewish, with a funny name, and was very small and hated sport, a real problem at a... ALAIN DE BOTTON As for despair, it comes about when I have been a fool and hate myself and despair of my personality... ALAIN DE BOTTON Therapy and counseling can do wonderful things for people. But they have emerged so far as what are ... ALAIN DE BOTTON The idea that one might use art for 'instrumental' reasons tends to set off alarm bells at t... ALAIN DE BOTTON We are never through with the requirement for acceptance. This isn't a curse limited to the inadequa... ALAIN DE BOTTON Status anxiety definitely exists at a political level. Many Iraqis were annoyed with the US essentia... ALAIN DE BOTTON I passionately believe that's it's not just what you say that counts, it's also how you say it - tha... ALAIN DE BOTTON I am in general a very pessimistic person with an optimistic, day-to-day take on things. The bare fa... ALAIN DE BOTTON We are certainly influenced by role models, and if we are surrounded by images of beautiful rich peo... ALAIN DE BOTTON The Arab-Israeli conflict is also in many ways a conflict about status: it's a war between two p... ALAIN DE BOTTON Getting to the top has an unfortunate tendency to persuade people that the system is OK after all. ALAIN DE BOTTON Katie Price is no exception. She, too, is - in a distinctive way - a philosopher. Partially, Katie P... ALAIN DE BOTTON Used to do a lot of falling in love with people, almost in the street, and imagining that there woul... ALAIN DE BOTTON Le Corbusier is an outstanding writer. His ideas achieved their impact in large measure because he c... ALAIN DE BOTTON Since the beginning of the 20th century, the public's relationship to art has been weakened by a... ALAIN DE BOTTON There's a certain kind of insular, old-fashioned, upper-class Britishness that gives me the spoo... ALAIN DE BOTTON After Carol had left, as Symons threw away a pile of used tissues and rearranged the cushions on the... ALAIN DE BOTTON I am conscious of trying to stretch the boundaries of non-fiction writing. It's always surprised... ALAIN DE BOTTON I've had my successes and failures. I know many academics in my field loathe me. I've come t... ALAIN DE BOTTON Sweetness is the opposite of machismo, which is everywhere - and I really don't get on with mach... ALAIN DE BOTTON For thousands of years, it had been nature--and its supposed creator--that had had a monopoly on awe... ALAIN DE BOTTON Everyone returns us to a different sense of ourselves, for we become a little of who they think we a... ALAIN DE BOTTON Perhaps the easiest people to fall in love with are those about whom we know nothing. Romances... ALAIN DE BOTTON A person cannot be at once a libertine and a married Romantic, however compelling both paradigms mig... ALAIN DE BOTTON We owe it to the fields that our houses will not be the inferiors of the virgin land they have repla... ALAIN DE BOTTON What we typically call love is only the start of love. Our understanding of love has been hijacked a... ALAIN DE BOTTON On account of its scale and complexity, the world will always outstrip the capacity of any single bo... ALAIN DE BOTTON Kant and Hegel are interesting thinkers. But I am happy to insist that they are also terrible writer... ALAIN DE BOTTON Emotional life is - alongside work - one of the great challenges of existence and is a theme that I ... ALAIN DE BOTTON The most attractive are not those who allow us to kiss them at once (we soon feel ungrateful) or tho... ALAIN DE BOTTON Booksellers are the most valuable destination for the lonely, given the numbers of books that were w... ALAIN DE BOTTON There are few more effective ways to promote tolerance between suspicious neighbours than to force t... ALAIN DE BOTTON There's a constant tension between the excitement of new people and security with one person. If... ALAIN DE BOTTON We are all more intelligent than we are capable, and awareness of the insanity of love has never sav... ALAIN DE BOTTON There is no one more likely to destroy us than the person we marry. ALAIN DE BOTTON The challenge lies in knowing how to bring this sort of day to a close. His mind has been wound to a... ALAIN DE BOTTON Many people in the intellectual elite are very scared of shouting. They insist on very quiet murmurs... ALAIN DE BOTTON as the determinants of high status keep shifting, so, too, naturally, will the triggers of status an... ALAIN DE BOTTON Far from rejecting outright any hierarchy of success or failure, philosophy instead reconfigures the... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is according to how we are able to answer the question of what we do (normally the first enquiry ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Philosophy, art, politics, religion and bohemia have never sought to do away entirely with the statu... ALAIN DE BOTTON People who hold important positions in society are commonly labelled "somebodies," and their inverse... ALAIN DE BOTTON The desire for high status is never stronger than in situations where "ordinary" life fails to answe... ALAIN DE BOTTON There is a danger of developing a blanket distaste for modern life which could have its attractions ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Anyone who isn't embarrassed of who they were last year probably isn't learning enough. ALAIN DE BOTTON Most of what makes a book 'good' is that we are reading it at the right moment for us. ALAIN DE BOTTON A 'good job' can be both practically attractive while still not good enough to devote your entire li... ALAIN DE BOTTON There is no such thing as work-life balance. Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life. ALAIN DE BOTTON When does a job feel meaningful? Whenever it allows us to generate delight or reduce suffering in ot... ALAIN DE BOTTON One's doing well if age improves even slightly one's capacity to hold on to that vital truism: "This... ALAIN DE BOTTON A good half of the art of living is resilience. ALAIN DE BOTTON ...workplace dynamics are no less complicated or unexpectedly intense than family relations, with on... ALAIN DE BOTTON We are humiliated by what is powerful and mean, but awed by what is powerful and noble. ALAIN DE BOTTON Literature has always had its circus side, its freaks and its frivolities - and maybe that's all par... ALAIN DE BOTTON I love the idea of a university as away from capitalist values, where people can do things that don&... ALAIN DE BOTTON What makes the prospect of death distinctive in the modern age is the background of permanent techno... ALAIN DE BOTTON It seems, in fact, that the more advanced a society is, the greater will be its interest in ruined t... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is one of the unexpected disasters of the modern age that our new unparalleled access to informat... ALAIN DE BOTTON In a secularising world, art has replaced religion as a touchstone of our reverence and devotion. ALAIN DE BOTTON Blind impatience is equally evident in the fruit section. Our ancestors might have delighted in the ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Bitterness: anger that forgot where it came from. ALAIN DE BOTTON Only as we mature does affection begin to depend on achievement. ALAIN DE BOTTON Don't despair: despair suggests you are in total control and know what is coming. You don't - surren... ALAIN DE BOTTON We are continuously challenged to discover new works of culture—and, in the process, we don’t al... ALAIN DE BOTTON We may seek a fortune for no greater reason than to secure the respect and attention of people who w... ALAIN DE BOTTON In Britain, because I live here, I can also run into problems of envy and competition. But all this ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Snobbery exists in all areas of life, not least literary criticism. By snobbery I mean, any method o... ALAIN DE BOTTON Pick up any newspaper or magazine, open the TV, and you'll be bombarded with suggestions of how to h... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless ... ALAIN DE BOTTON I've tried to write about Heathrow before and been escorted off the premises. ALAIN DE BOTTON Because I have this thing about birthdays--they always remind me of death and forced jollity. ALAIN DE BOTTON He was a volatile mixture of confidence and vulnerability. He could deliver extended monologues on p... ALAIN DE BOTTON The feeling one has no time to get anything done provides the pressure that guarantees one does get ... ALAIN DE BOTTON I'm fascinated by Comte's clear-eyed analysis of what was wrong with modern society, which i... ALAIN DE BOTTON The largest part of what we call 'personality' is determined by how we've opted to defend ourselves ... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is in dialogue with pain that many beautiful things acquire their value. Acquaintance with grief ... ALAIN DE BOTTON The most courageous act in politics is to try to understand your opponent. ALAIN DE BOTTON The idea of a book that can make a change to your life, that can affect your perspective, is a beaut... ALAIN DE BOTTON The philosophy I love is very selective. It is really just the bit that is involved in a search for ... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is hope--with regard to our careers, our love lives, our children, our politicians, and our plane... ALAIN DE BOTTON I learnt to stop fantasising about the perfect job or the perfect relationship because that can actu... ALAIN DE BOTTON He was marked out by his relentless ability to find fault with others' mediocrity--suggesting that a... ALAIN DE BOTTON On paper, being good sounds great but a lot depends on the atmosphere of the workplace or community ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Travel is a lot like love. ALAIN DE BOTTON What is fascinating about marriage is why anyone wants to get married. ALAIN DE BOTTON I feel that the great challenge of our time is the communication of ideas. ALAIN DE BOTTON Learning to give up on perfection may be just about the most romantic move any of us could make. ALAIN DE BOTTON Work is a way of bringing order to chaos, and there's a basic satisfaction in seeing that we are... ALAIN DE BOTTON I like working with people. I believe change can only come through collaboration. ALAIN DE BOTTON I see religion as a storehouse of lots of really good ideas that a secular world should look at, rai... ALAIN DE BOTTON Rather than getting more spoilt with age, as difficulties pile up, epiphanies of gratitude abound. ALAIN DE BOTTON For the rest of history, for most of us, our bright promise will always fall short of being actualis... ALAIN DE BOTTON In 'Art as Therapy', we argue that art is a tool that can variously help to inspire, console... ALAIN DE BOTTON I was a very un-literary child, which might reassure parents with kids who don't read. ALAIN DE BOTTON In our more arrogant moments, the sin of pride—or superbia, in Augustine's Latin formulation—tak... ALAIN DE BOTTON Partially undermining the manufacturer's ability to assert that its work constituted a meaningful co... ALAIN DE BOTTON Pegging your contentment to the overall state of the world rather than of your own life: the basis o... ALAIN DE BOTTON The solution as consumers is - perhaps surprisingly - to take adverts very, very seriously. We shoul... ALAIN DE BOTTON We don't need to be constantly reasonable in order to have good relationships; all we need to have m... ALAIN DE BOTTON To look at the paper is to raise a seashell to one's ear and to be overwhelmed by the roar of humani... ALAIN DE BOTTON I think of myself as quite a shy person. But when I'm curious about something, I'll go quite... ALAIN DE BOTTON Artworks are especially good at helping our psyches in a variety of ways: they rebalance our moods, ... ALAIN DE BOTTON [T]he unsympathetic assessments we make of others are usually the result of nothing more sinister th... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is not only the hostility of others that may prevent us from questioning the status quo. Our will... ALAIN DE BOTTON The most boring and unproductive question one can ask of any religion is whether or not it is true. ALAIN DE BOTTON Whatever modern democracies may tell themselves about their commitment to free speech and to diversi... ALAIN DE BOTTON The true nature of bureaucracy may be nowhere more obvious to the observer than in a developing coun... ALAIN DE BOTTON To be loved by someone is to realize how much they share the same needs that lie at the heart of our... ALAIN DE BOTTON We fall in love because we long to escape from ourselves with someone as beautiful, intelligent, and... ALAIN DE BOTTON Being content is perhaps no less easy than playing the violin well: and requires no less practice. ALAIN DE BOTTON A storyteller who provided us with such a profusion of details would rapidly grow maddening. Unfortu... ALAIN DE BOTTON We used to build temples, and museums are about as close as secular society dares to go in facing up... ALAIN DE BOTTON The Anxiety of Sunday afternoon: your unlived lives and infinite possibility pressing upon the const... ALAIN DE BOTTON Blessed with riches and possibilities far beyond anything imagined by ancestors who tilled the unpre... ALAIN DE BOTTON We need a home in the psychological sense as much as we need one in the physical: to compensate for ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Even if our loved ones have assured us that they will be busy at work, even if they told us they hat... ALAIN DE BOTTON You normally have to be bashed about a bit by life to see the point of daffodils, sunsets and uneven... ALAIN DE BOTTON What a peculiar civilisation this was: inordinately rich, yet inclined to accrue its wealth through ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Despite the best efforts of critics and the hopes of authors, our tastes in books are probably as in... ALAIN DE BOTTON We would like to go and see the field that Millet…shows us in his Springtime, we would like Claude... ALAIN DE BOTTON Our feelings of anxiety are genuine but confused signals that something is amiss, and so need to be ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Paying tax should be framed as a glorious civic duty worthy of gratitude - not a punishment for maki... ALAIN DE BOTTON It was no longer her absence that wounded me, but my growing indifference to it. Forgetting, however... ALAIN DE BOTTON Perhaps it is true that we do not really exist until there is someone there to see us existing, we c... ALAIN DE BOTTON Every fall into love involves the triumph of hope over self-knowledge. We fall in love hoping we won... ALAIN DE BOTTON Nature puts us all in our places. Being made to feel small isn't something we welcome when it's done... ALAIN DE BOTTON in Flaubert’s eyes, that only entirely illiterate and uneducated Frenchmen now stood a chance of b... ALAIN DE BOTTON A clean conscience is the preserve of those without sufficient imagination. ALAIN DE BOTTON In the past, Flaubert implied, idiots had had no clue as to what the carbon structure of diamonds wa... ALAIN DE BOTTON Never too late to learn some embarrassingly basic, stupidly obvious things about oneself. ALAIN DE BOTTON But we would do well to meditate daily, rather as the religious do on their God, on the 9.5 trillion... ALAIN DE BOTTON To a shameful extent, the charm of marriage boils down to how unpleasant it is to be alone. This isn... ALAIN DE BOTTON One of the best protections against disappointment is to have a lot going on. ALAIN DE BOTTON What kills us isn't one big thing, but thousands of tiny obligations we can't turn down for fear of ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Booksellers are the most valuable destination for the lonely, given the numbers of books written bec... ALAIN DE BOTTON It is precisely when we hear little from our partner which frightens, shocks, or sickens us that we ... ALAIN DE BOTTON Unrequited love may be painful, but it is safely painful, because it does not involve inflicting dam... ALAIN DE BOTTON It's clear to me that there is no good reason for many philosophy books to sound as complicated as t... ALAIN DE BOTTON Jarenlang kwam ik bij het boodschappen doen langs een huis dat weliswaar een van de lelijkste gebouw... ALAIN DE BOTTON Snobbery exists in all areas of life, not least literary criticism. By snobbery I mean, any method o... ALAIN BOTTON Kant and Hegel are interesting thinkers. But I am happy to insist that they are also terrible writer... ALAIN BOTTON I passionately believe that's it's not just what you say that counts, it's also how you say it - tha... ALAIN BOTTON I am in general a very pessimistic person with an optimistic, day-to-day take on things. The bare fa... ALAIN BOTTON