There's a rule of writing: if everything is funny, nothing is funny; if everything is sad, nothing is sad. You want that contrast.


J. Michael Straczynski

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I will walk without noise and I will open the door in darkness and I will
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
I think it's a comedian's job to make everything funny. Nothing is off-limits.
DONALD GLOVER
Einmal hat ihm einer im Schlaf die Schuhe ausgezogen, reingeschissen und wieder angezogen. Um diese ...
HEINZ STRUNK
But I do not do these things because we are a family. I do them because they are common decencies. T...
JOHNATHAN SAFRAN FOER
He awoke each morning with the desire to do right, to be a good and meaningful person, to be, as sim...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
Our love was the affliction for which only our love was the cure.
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
They do not desire anything more than everything they have known.
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
What is being awake if not interpreting our dreams, or dreaming if not interpreting our wake?
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's not f...
CALVIN TRILLIN
All writing is that structure of revelation. There's something you want to find out. If you know...
WALTER MOSLEY
David Mamet's writing is pretty spectacular, obviously. I like the honesty of it; I like how fun...
T. R. KNIGHT
Life is a racket. Writing is a racket. Sincerity is a racket. Everything's a racket.
NICK TOSCHES
Eddie Murphy said once in an interview that nothing is offensive if it's funny. I sort of agree ...
ARTIE LANGE
Everything is funny, if you can laugh at it.
LEWIS CARROLL
Isn't it funny that day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different.
C.S. LEWIS
Timing is everything.
MOLLY SIMS
Timing is everything.
TOMMY SHAW
The secret to success is to own nothing, but control everything.
NELSON ROCKEFELLER
Money is not everything.
BEN OAK
I will describe my eyes and then begin the story. My eyes are blue and resplendent. Now I will begin...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
I begin by imagining
The impossible
And end by accomplishing
The impossible.
SRI CHINMOY
Our life is a series of moments. Let them all go. Moments. All gathering towards this one.
NOW IS GOOD
It's a sad day when a woman being funny and interested in science is considered newsworthy.
ELISE ANDREW
Why is it that good times aren't permitted to last? Especially when we have put in so much time and ...
LESLIE W.P. GARLAND
I believe that there is a Matrix and... to be more accurate I am in the Pornography Matrix.
DEYTH BANGER
if sex is everything then why are you so sad and lonely
R.H. SIN
Timing is everything with relationships.
RASHIDA JONES
Jealousy? Not at all. Sad, if anything, I thought. There is nothing she has that I could possibly wa...
REBECCA LOOS
Nothing is impossible on 'Game of Thrones.'
FAYE MARSAY
Without mathematics, there's nothing you can do. Everything around you is mathematics. Everythin...
SHAKUNTALA DEVI
Funny + sad is what I'm pitching for, every time.
NICK HORNBY
Things that I feel really sad about, I talk about. That way, if it's funny, it doesn't hurt ...
PETE DAVIDSON
It's funny, everything is so much easier when you do it yourself.
CARINE ROITFELD
Ah, the magic of music, with it, all things are possible.
E.A. BUCCHIANERI
I think a lot of times we're so told in our world that marriage is everything, and having a part...
BROOKE ELLIOTT
When carrying the burden of problems and stress that life seems to endlessly hurtle towards us. We g...
GARY F EVANS...
To have hope in an age where hope is very scarce and hurt, jealousy and pain are more prominent is a...
GARY F EVANS...
Truth metastasized into lurid fantasy.
F. MULDER
Happiness does not create humor. There's nothing funny about being happy. Sadness creates humor. Kra...
CHARLES M. SCHULZ
Ultimately love is everything.
M. SCOTT PECK
sometimes the most simple things in the world can be the most beautiful.
ROWENA BEAUMONT CHERRY
This is the sixty-nine,” I told him,
presenting the magazine in front of him. I put my finger...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
Striving for the impossible is better than striving for nothing.
SCOTT MORTENSEN
It is most unlikely. But--here comes the big "but"--not impossible.
ROALD DAHL
You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.

It's really funny.
BRANDON SANDERSON
If you want a golden rule that will fit everything, this is it: Have nothing in your houses that you...
WILLIAM MORRIS
There's nothing less funny than someone who looks cool. There's nothing more unappealing.
ERIC WAREHEIM
When living is too sweet and swanky, it may be very hard to appreciate the simplest things in life. ...
ERIK PEVERNAGIE
With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
DAISAKU IKEDA
Nothing is impossible to a willing heart.
JOHN HEYWOOD
Funny is funny is funny.
BOB NEWHART
Laughter is involuntary. If it's funny you laugh.
TOM LEHRER
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERS
The sad truth is that opportunity doesn't knock twice.
GLORIA ESTEFAN
It’s a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even s...
ERIC ROTH
It's the whole gambit. There are shorts, some are funny, some are sad, some are serious and some are...
MARTHA MITCHELL
God loves the plagiarist. And so it is written, 'God created humankind in His image, in the image of...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
Money is a tremendous advantage in just about everything, but in terms of reproduction, if you'r...
JENNIFER WEINER
The only thing impossible is the impossibility of the impossible
MICHAEL WILLIAM FINNEGAN
If everything is the same, nothing is special.
LADY STARLIGHT
The truth is you don't know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride, and nothing ...
EMINEM
Integrity is not everything, but it is the only thing that matters.
JEFFREY FRY
How can you analyse what is funny? What's funny to one isn't funny to another... What's ...
LES DAWSON
There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything i...
ALBERT EINSTEIN
It is sad when people can't connect, and the sense of desperation that you feel when there is no...
DAVID FRANKEL
If Christ is not all to you He is nothing to you. He will never go into partnership as a part Saviou...
CHARLES HADDON SPURGEON
When he entered the anteroom, two women looked up at him. One was Miss Robertson, the governor's sec...
GEORGE P. ELLIOTT
THE PROBLEM OF GOOD: WHY UNCONDITIONALLY GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO UNCONDITIONALLY BAD PEOPLE
(SEE ...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
Brod’s life was a slow realization that the world was not for her, and that for whatever reason, s...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
I have been waiting for you for so long.”
I pointed to the car. “We are searching for Trach...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
She was with me. She did all of those things and so many more, things I would never tell anyone, and...
JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER
I think timing is everything.
TIONNE WATKINS
The word "impossible" is only in the mind
And not in the heart.
If we can remain in the he...
SRI CHINMOY
There's an opposite to déjà vu. They call it jamais vu. It's when you meet the same people or visi...
CHUCK PALAHNIUK
If only…the saddest words in the English language.
KRISTAN HIGGINS
Pure unadulterated success is not as funny as failure.
WILL ARNETT
I won't predict anything historic. But nothing is impossible.
MICHAEL PHELPS
Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible.
MARY MCLEOD BETHUNE
If you have a character that doesn't have anything wrong with him, there's nothing funny abo...
WILL ARNETT
Life is a re-discovery.
BRIAN BLESSED
If you think that life is a celebration full of party poppers and merry go rounds it's not it's a ga...
GARY F EVANS...
Life Is a Misconception.
DEYTH BANGER
Life is a desire!
DEYTH BANGER
To trust someone you must firstly remember that it is a two way street that will go all the way if y...
GARY F EVANS...
It is a lie.
ARTHUR MILLER
The world is a beautiful place
to be born into
if you don't mind happiness
not always...
LAWRENCE FERLINGHETTI
It is what it is, it is what you make it.
JAMES DURBIN
It is what it is, and it ain't nothin' else... Everything is clearly, openly, plainly delive...
DAN FLAVIN
You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unb...
WHY YAWNING IS CONTAGIOUS
Be original, be yourself, be you.
ELISE R MAUDE IS
Is everything sad going to come untrue?
J.R.R. TOLKIEN
If you seek nothing, you'll earn everything; but if you seek everything, you'll earn nothing.
MITEB KHANTASH ALQARNI
Depression is internal. The upswings and downswings have pretty much nothing to do with what's g...
GRAHAM MOORE
Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play.
J.R. RIM
Justin Timberlake is everything, and what more could you want in a person? He's funny. He's ...
BRITNEY SPEARS
What do you want a meaning for? Life is a desire, not a meaning.
CHARLIE CHAPLIN
The easiest bit is when you're talking. It's listening that is so difficult. If you get out ...
ART MALIK
There is nothing sweeter in this sad world than the sound of someone you love calling your name.
KATE DICAMILLO
If Michael Steele doesn't make you sad, well, then there's radio host Rush Limbaugh, no long...
DAVID SHUSTER
There is nothing funny about a well-adjusted, intelligent person making the right choices.
TIM HEIDECKER

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A champion views resistance as a gift of energy.
MICHAEL J. GELB
Over-seriousness is a warning sign for mediocrity and bureaucratic thinking. People who are seriousl...
MICHAEL J. GELB
I swear, the reason for full moons is so the gods can more clearly see the mischief they create.
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
After a year or so I really thought I was Howard Hughes. Here I was at eighteen years old, getting a...
MICHAEL J. FOX
I don't have a set of tenets, but I live an ethical life. I practice a humility that presupposes...
MICHAEL J. FOX
As a kid, I was into music, played guitar in a band. Then I started acting in plays in junior high s...
MICHAEL J. FOX
There is no poison on earth more potent, nor half so deadly, as a partial truth mixed with passion
MICHAEL J. TUCKER
Our incredible bewilderment (wilderness separation) blinds us from seeing that our many personal and...
MICHAEL J. COHEN
Now I feel and I say all the time that vanity is, like, long gone. I'm really free of worrying a...
MICHAEL J. FOX
[T]he commitment to a framework neutral among ends can be seen as a kind of value [...] but its valu...
MICHAEL J. SANDEL
First, individual rights cannot be sacrificed for the sake of the general good, and second, the prin...
MICHAEL J. SANDEL
This is heavy, Doc.
MICHAEL J. FOX
In New York, the Mets are winning the World Series in 1969; that was pretty big, but I would say the...
MICHAEL J. MASSIMINO
The sense of respiration is an example of our natural sense relationship with the atmospheric matrix...
MICHAEL J. COHEN
The most essential prediction of Darwinism is that, given an astronomical number of chances, unintel...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
The only thing worse than an opportunity you don't deserve is blowing an opportunity.
MICHAEL J. FOX
What other people think about me is not my business.
MICHAEL J. FOX
I can get sad, I can get frustrated, I can get scared, but I never get depressed - because there's j...
MICHAEL J. FOX
If you're lucky, in some point in the future when you're in need of guidance or perhaps moral suppor...
MICHAEL J. FOX
Verily, for nine hundred years have I lost. Everyone I knew is dead, the empire gone, and who knows ...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
If this hast been done to language, I fear to know the fate of all else.
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
When I was younger, I was always described as happy-go-lucky.
MICHAEL J. FOX
You don’t win battles with hate. Anger and hate can make you brave, make you strong, but they also...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
I had all the usual ambition growing up. I wanted to be a writer, a musician, a hockey player. I wan...
MICHAEL J. FOX
The rumor mill will always grind the grain of misinformation into the flour of untruth and the peopl...
J. MICHAEL BREWER
I don't have any affirmations, I don't have any of that stuff. My natural state is to look a...
MICHAEL J. FOX
Some of the best friends you'll ever meet in your life, you'll meet though your children--mothers an...
MICHAEL J. FOX
Real arms races are run by highly intelligent, bespectacled engineers in glass offices thoughtfully ...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
The result of these cumulative efforts to investigate the cell—to investigate life at the molecula...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
Is the conclusion that the universe was designed - and that the design extends deeply into life - sc...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
The conclusion of intelligent design flows naturally from the data itself—not from sacred books or...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
Random mutations much more easily debilitate genes than improve them, and that this is true even of ...
MICHAEL J. BEHE
You've probably read in People that I'm a nice guy - but when the doctor first told me I had...
MICHAEL J. FOX
Everyone stared in shock at the pool of white robes and the bright-red blood that began to stain the...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
First and foremost, the chicken was flooded with bad omens in the same overwhelming manner that Suri...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
A wise man once told me no man can escape death, but it’s how we run that defines us. And if I hav...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
It was like waiting for the sunrise and a chicken to hatch— if the sun marked the end of the world...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Ferrol’s Law was created for ordinary Fhrey, not the Miralyith,” Gryndal said. “The Art has el...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Well, do you still make that marvelous wine? The pale red one, with a hint of nuts? I’ve boasted a...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Do you see the butterfly?” Suri grinned with enthusiasm.
“Yes, I see it, but—”
�...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
I want to know how long we have before he rises. If I cut off his head, will he stay down longer?”...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Freedom, he discovered, had built a greater prison than his family or clan had.
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
How are you speaking?” Gryndal asked.
“With my mouth,” she said. “Does everyone play th...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Remember, it’s easier to believe an outlandish lie confirming what you suspect than the most obvio...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
What length will a mother go to on behalf of her child? How long is time? What is the depth of love?...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Strange game, this stating the obvious,” Suri said, shaking her head. She got up and joined Minna ...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Why are you here?”
“Oh— I came to tell the chieftain we’re going to die.” The girl sa...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Caught early enough, the waking forest had no time to disguise itself into something mundane. This w...
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN
Sunlight had a way of showing the realities that shadows born of firelight hid. The
MICHAEL J. SULLIVAN