Well, Colonel, there is diplomacy and there is reality. Our ambassador represents diplomacy. I represent reality. And the reality is we don't want you.

La ciudad se estremece
con sus ruidos terribles,
convulsiones
de risa,
estertores de miedo.
Y la ciudad tiembla
y conjetura
con sus muecas
descoloridas
y sus danzas
informes.

Diaz can get get after you but he can be laid back out there with you, too. He's a real good leader behind the plate. He takes charge back there. He's a real big target and fun to throw to. He's really receiving the ball well and throwing the ball down to second.

In fairness, Latin America's elected civilian leaders have made progress in some areas. They have brought their countries back to international respectability, curbed flagrant human rights violations, and sought to build democratic political institutions.

No offense to Iceland, but Latin America is where the fugitive leaker Edward Snowden should settle.

A few of the world's most famous non-American novelists have large followings in the United States, among them Gabriel Garcia Marquez and Guenter Grass, who were both popular even before winning the Nobel.