Akiva Schaffer
Related Are you taking us to the beach?" - Dan Cahill JUDE WATSON I can tell you that you will have your hearts broken more by the people you love than by the people ... MARGARET PETERSON HADDIX It looks ancient," - Amy Cahill JUDE WATSON Let's head out to the ruins." - Dan Cahill ROLAND SMITH It SMELLS ancient," - Dan Cahill JUDE WATSON Palm trees were fanned by a warm, light breeze, and they rolled down their windows to smell the sea. JUDE WATSON I used to watch 'Grey's Anatomy' pretty religiously. ERINN HAYES About f-f-ace!" she said to the horse, flailing with her boots. "Into the barn, please. It's time fo... PETER LERANGIS RICK RIORDAN BILL HADER RICK RIORDAN I learned something very important early on: You accept what happens and move on. In other words, if... BILLY CASPER I'm still a big 'Grey's Anatomy' fan. BROOKE ELLIOTT Alas, I think I am becoming a god. TITUS LUCAN LUCAN TOMMY CHONG Don't have to see," the pilot grunted. "Olga knows the way."GORDON KORMAN SENECA SENECA SENECA SENECA SENECA SENECA SENECA ROBERT ORBEN PAIGE VANZANT LOIS LOWRY EDDIE MURPHY I came from the Groundlings Theatre in L.A., and there, you're guaranteed to at least try someth... TARAN KILLAM STEVEN WRIGHT ADAM MCKAY If you want proof that 'Catfish' was real, just put me in an audition room and watch me fall... NEV SCHULMAN There's no path to being a writer that's applicable to everyone. Some young writers have the... JONATHAN DEE I did photograph Angelina Jolie up in Vancouver when she was making 'Life Or Something Like It&#... DOUGLAS KIRKLAND When I was at MIT, they had a beta test of Mosaic, the first popular browser. I remember looking at ... AUSTAN GOOLSBEE My mother was a Bible student, and when I was a youngster, both my mother and father would say, '... MONTE IRVIN CORAZON AQUINO People wince when something is in bad taste. They laugh when it's funny. If it's too dirty o... MICHAEL PATRICK KING I always find Victoria's Secret models a bit weird. EDIE CAMPBELL When 'Goodfellas' is on TNT, and they've taken out all the curse words and put Tide comm... ATO ESSANDOH PAUL KALANITHI BILL COSBY OLGA KURYLENKO JAM MASTER JAY STEPHEN COLBERT We believed that there's no such thing as good art or bad art. Art is art. If it's bad, it&#... BILLY AL BENGSTON NEIL PEART To be shapely when you're in the seventh grade is not exactly what everyone's looking for, o... KATEY SAGAL People who weren't there can say it was idiotic or shortsighted, but when you're in a moment... BOB MORLEY J. R. MARTINEZ ROBERT STERNBERG BOB SEGER There's a couple of movie parts that I can't remember. There was always something kind of lu... CRAIG ROBINSON I knew 'Bad Girls' attracts a younger audience, and it's vital to get oneself known to t... KATE O'MARA IAIN DUNCAN SMITH GIL SCOTT-HERON BILL BURR JOSS WHEDON I mean this sincerely... and I don't know why, but there was a period of time that for some reas... DAVE FINKEL They say there's no second act in American lives. There's something there worth exploring. G... SCOTT RUDIN I'm proud to say that I was that guy playing the character of Dr. Burke on 'Grey's Anato... ISAIAH WASHINGTON BETTY WHITE MICHAEL IGNATIEFF What's the message in Metallica? There is no message, but if there was a message, it really shou... LARS ULRICH In feature films, unless there was a body count, they weren't hiring me to direct it. GARY SHERMAN LZ GRANDERSON KENDRA WILKINSON IGGY AZALEA ADELAIDE KANE CHRIS BROWN The song 'Conceited' on 'There's Something About Remy' was inspired by people al... REMY MA MALCOLM TURNBULL All the way on the West Coast, never having seen a Broadway show, it was like, 'They don't w... DAVEED DIGGS That's the biggest shame there is, that L.A. doesn't have a team. I was a big fan of the L.A... ERIC BRAEDEN KEKE PALMER 'Elitist' doesn't need to mean wealthy and conservative; it can also mean specialised an... MARK MORRIS TOM SELLECK AMY HECKERLING I had two primary cancers, which was pretty unusual. And when I got the second one, people told me s... SAM TAYLOR-WOOD If you can believe it, Hollywood wanted to change my birthdate. I was born after Valentine's Day... CESAR ROMERO I was dyslexic - was, still am - 'cause I would see words that weren't there. And people jus... TIM CONWAY When it's your words, and then you watch it connect with an audience as the artist, I kinda refl... BRETT YOUNG MAE WEST BILL HADER TABATHA COFFEY If there's a country, and it's dangerous, and we deploy a U.S. military man or woman, if the... JOHN F. KELLY The impetus for 'The Sisters Brothers' was it occurred to me that there was no neurosis in w... PATRICK DEWITT I work on words quite separately to music. They're both ongoing, and I don't ever feel like ... P. J. HARVEY JACK WHITE MIKE LOVE GARY ROSS PAT ROBERTSON BRION JAMES BILL CARTWRIGHT I realised that the only time I really enjoyed music was when I was in the studio writing. So even t... ADAM RICKITT I think people are transient. Back in the early church, there was a 'stick and stay' mentali... MARVIN SAPP In something like 'Frank,' which is a comedy, albeit a strange and emotional one, you can ab... LENNY ABRAHAMSON JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT MILEY CYRUS
More Akiva Schaffer
AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER AKIVA SCHAFFER In past elections, the parties all adopted strong positions on the issue of peace. But this time, th... AKIVA ELDAR When he talks to the Palestinians he thinks about a referendum in Israel ... He is focusing on the I... AKIVA ELDAR The problem is that he became a negative icon in the Arab world, in the eyes of the Palestinians, in... AKIVA ELDAR The chances are not very good that the Palestinians and the Israelis will cut the only possible deal... AKIVA ELDAR There are risks in someone who believes that the peace process started the day he was elected prime ... AKIVA ELDAR As long as you need Uncle Sam, you have to listen to him and you have to take into consideration his... AKIVA ELDAR Vote counting and ballot collecting does not occur in the light of day. There are too many occasions... BOB SCHAFFER There are many hands touching ballots after a voter drops his ballot into the ballot box. There is n... BOB SCHAFFER Goths tend to be rather pacifistic, so to associate all Goths with violence because some of them a... CHRIS SCHAFFER Goths don't identify with evil, we mourn the evil in society. The fascination with death is basica... CHRIS SCHAFFER It is unlikely Yanukovich won. If he did, his government made it impossible to determine. BOB SCHAFFER In the late afternoons and early evenings, the crowd is easily over 1 million. That many people simp... BOB SCHAFFER In Congress, I was co-chairman of the Congressional Ukrainian Caucus, which became one of the larges... BOB SCHAFFER I would love to see the French spending money to restore Iraq. BOB SCHAFFER Government is just spending too much money. BOB SCHAFFER As long as the opposition believes the world will stand with Ukraine's democrat reformers, they will... BOB SCHAFFER That really doesn't affect us in a negative way. There are some positives to it. It will bring a lot... BOB SCHAFFER It is clear that parents of children attending government-owned schools in Colorado cannot rely on s... BOB SCHAFFER If you're elected on the State Board of Education to deal with education issues, then you should bol... BOB SCHAFFER I need to know why my customers leave. BOB SCHAFFER One cannot help being impressed by the protesters. They have begun each day of the protest in Kiev i... BOB SCHAFFER Obviously anything that impacts people's willingness to travel is of grave concern to the global eve... ADAM SCHAFFER Many trade show organizers are not known for strong advance planning for these types of events. ADAM SCHAFFER It hasn't been a topic of discussion at the meetings and events I've been to. ADAM SCHAFFER We have not gotten a call inviting him back. We have no trips scheduled to go to Detroit. PETER SCHAFFER He was cleaning out vents in the ceiling in which inmates had put wads of toilet paper. ELISE SCHAFFER Otherwise, we will be dealing with this for the next 10 years. CHARLIE SCHAFFER Most of them produced slowly and steadily over the whole season, and many of them were still growing... KAREN SCHAFFER This virus tends to stick to tissue rather than move through it, so when we inject it into an organ ... DAVID SCHAFFER The Russians have a lot at stake, and the power of Moscow pride should never be underestimated. BOB SCHAFFER He actually came out with an extraordinary deal, considering what he did. I think the jurors could b... KENT SCHAFFER The city will have no further comment on this issue. We're just going around and around with Mr. Jim... CHARLIE SCHAFFER It's all true, ... I did talk about pubic hair in response to someone's paper, and I show pictures o... MICHAEL SCHAFFER All we're really waiting on is the paperwork. MICHAEL SCHAFFER Oak is always going to be the most popular. JIM SCHAFFER The project will be sensitive to maintain the natural environment of the creek. It will also signifi... CHARLIE SCHAFFER For a city our size, we probably do more capital improvement projects than any other city in Califor... CHARLIE SCHAFFER Reducing the tax burden is necessary to produce economic growth. BOB SCHAFFER My mother is Ukrainian. She immigrated to the U.S. from Canada as a child. BOB SCHAFFER Though there is growing division among the Ukrainian military ranks as to loyalty in this revolution... BOB SCHAFFER It's still winter. Slow down. ELISE SCHAFFER Nobody actually saw him fall, so nobody can actually say how it happened. ELISE SCHAFFER Gene delivery is complicated because it's difficult for us to know how to change the properties of t... DAVID SCHAFFER Gene therapy is a promising approach to curing disease, but for a number of years, the problem has b... DAVID SCHAFFER The recent history of Ukraine is replete with dead journalists, beaten journalists, news agencies be... BOB SCHAFFER I thought we were going to have a good team this year. I knew our four seniors were good players and... GREGG SCHAFFER As the game wore on we were able to solve their press. It disrupted us early, but the kids adjusted ... GREGG SCHAFFER Laser made a great play. It was a contested 3 from long range and he made a big shot. GREGG SCHAFFER I couldn't be more proud of two guys (Clore and Dahn) and the defense they played. GREGG SCHAFFER I thought we executed extremely well in overtime. GREGG SCHAFFER I think our guys competed to the very last second of regulation. Without that mindset and intensity ... GREGG SCHAFFER I'm just extremely proud of our toughness and composure all night long. I can't say enough about Nil... GREGG SCHAFFER Women's place is in the House - and in the Senate GLORIA SCHAFFER It's not really in their interest to carry this. We're focused on just his one product. That's why t... GEORGE SCHAFFER We're essentially putting ourselves out of business. That's one reason I know that I have to start l... GEORGE SCHAFFER It's useful, it's basic and it's just my opinion, but I think everyone should have a Webster's Dicti... KAREN SCHAFFER Once the flow of the game went through three quarters and it was nip and tuck, we knew it was going ... JEFF SCHAFFER We'll have opportunities to experience Appalachian culture and learn why poverty is an issue there. ... JEFF SCHAFFER We're from Michigan. We're only excited because it's in Detroit. JEFF SCHAFFER This is really important to make sense of the experience and to grow from it. JEFF SCHAFFER We played well. We're finally starting to come together. We've been sputtering, playing a couple of ... JEFF SCHAFFER I was appalled at how many people felt up against a brick wall. JOCELYN SCHAFFER It makes me very sad. I don't think the difficulties parents face are fully appreciated by the court... JOCELYN SCHAFFER My feeling is that it's anyone's guess. JOCELYN SCHAFFER environment for self-discovery. MICHAEL SCHAFFER Give a man a fish and he has food for a day; teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him of the... ZENNA SCHAFFER All is foreseen, but freedom of choice is given. AKIVA BEN JOSEPH Even the poorest in Israel are looked upon as freemen who have lost their possessions, for they are ... AKIVA BEN JOSEPH Jesting and levity accustom a man to lewdness. AKIVA BEN JOSEPH Wheresoever thou findest a high mountain or a lofty hill and a green tree, know that an idol is ther... AKIVA BEN JOSEPH He that wounds himself, even though he has not the right, is not culpable; but if others have wounde... AKIVA BEN JOSEPH Beloved are Israel, for they were called children of God; still greater was the love in that it was ... AKIVA BEN JOSEPH The tradition is a fence around the law; tithes are a fence around riches; vows are a fence around a... AKIVA BEN JOSEPH There isÂ…nothing to suggest that mothering cannot be shared by several people. H. R. SCHAFFER
You see?" Damien leaned over his desk and spread out half a dozen charcoal sketches. "These are only... 
I got invited to the Playboy Mansion with the Lonely Island guys after their first season on 'SN... 
I've got a few ideas," (Amy) admitted. "But I don't know where we're going in the long term. I mean ... 
Some men by ancestry are only the shadow of a mighty name. 
I have a wife, I have sons: all of them hostages given to fate. 
People try to put ownership on things: 'That's mine, that's my joke.' No such thing.... 
Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. 
Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness. 
Just as I shall select my ship when I am about to go on a voyage, or my house when I propose to take... 
There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no ... 
I'm just going to be myself; there's no reason for me to try and go out there and put a cert... 
When I wrote 'The Giver,' it contained no so-called 'bad words.' It was set, after a... 
There's a bunch of places in the world I haven't been to, 'cause I can only be on a plan... 
When I was on TV in the '80s, I wasn't thinking, 'There's a 10-year-old kid watching... 
When I was at 'SNL,' I would constantly get in arguments, 'Why aren't we more politi... 
I've reached a point in life where it's no longer necessary to try to impress. If they like ... 
When there's no place for the scalpel, words are the surgeon's only tool. 
If you watch kids looking at something on television, even something that's produced for them an... 
If a man can make me laugh and stimulate me intellectually, then I wouldn't mind if he was 4 ft.... 
Back in the day, if someone said that hip hop and rap was a fad, that was a joke to me because they ... 
The only thing that I don't like is my kids watching comedy that isn't actually funny. There... 
I always thought if I could just put something in words perfectly enough, people would get the idea,... 
It's hard for people sometimes to relate to me. They weren't in the military, they weren'... 
In other words, if a teacher only teaches in one way, then they conclude that the kids who can't... 
Be original. That's my best advice. You're going to find that there's something that you... 
It's fairness to say those who work hard, get up in the morning, cut their cloth - in other word... 
I thought that some of my best records was when there wasn't a lot of work being done on it, lik... 
The only time I get sick of making people laugh is when I'm in a non-writing-joke mode, and I ju... 
I always enjoy conversation more if there is some substance to it - which is a just incredibly hilar... 
I love words. Sudoku I don't get into, I'm not into numbers that much, and there are people ... 
What's distinctively shocking about Machiavelli is that he didn't care. He believed not only... 
There is no shame in black athletes not wanting to be role models, but there should be shame when th... 
I've only fallen in love once, and once was enough for me, but that doesn't mean my eyes won... 
I always thought that there was something in hip-hop culture that was the misfit of all the musical ... 
I didn't know what was going to happen with 'Teen Wolf.' I was only scheduled to do four... 
With fame, you can't trust everybody. You can't depend on them being there for you as a pers... 
The only reason to be in politics is public service. There's no other reason. Frankly, if that&#... 
Real faith is when you believe in something that you can't see. When things are going really bad... 
But, you know there's a lot of westerns - not that they were bad - it's just that they can b... 
There was one vampire movie that Gerard Butler was in, 'Dracula 2000,' and they touched on s... 
Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right no... 
There's so much bullying with young people and them feeling like they can't come out, and th... 
When you put something out there into the world, there's all these words you don't want to h... 
'The Warmth of the Sun' was a very beautiful song that Brian and I wrote in the time period ... 
There's something so wonderful about writing in rhyme where it isn't just the meaning of the... 
God created the world; the laws of nature were created by God. True science tries to find out what G... 
I never play a villain that I don't have something I can either do or say so the audience sees t... 
I remember when I was in college, people told me I couldn't play in the NBA. There's always ... 
A lot of the motivation for doing the 'Make 'Em Laugh' on SNL was because I had just fin... 
If I could get any animal it would be a dolphin. I want one so bad. Me and my mom went swimming with... 
All of our heroes did silly stuff early and got more serious as time went on. Steve Martin, Adam San... 
I find that 'Ghostbusters' and 'Alien' actually have a lot in common in that they... 
Cartoons are the best stuff on TV. 'Wonder Showzen,' 'Aqua Teen,' 'SpongeBob,... 